what was your biggest concern before moving abroad with kids?

[stilldazed]

I have followed DH overseas twice now and someone asked me what my biggest worry was...honestly, I wanted to find a good playgroup...seems a bit trivial now but I remember how happy I was when ài found one.

what were you most worried about?

I was worried about security when we moved to South Africa. (I don't think that was a silly thing to worry about )

I also used to worry each time we moved that the DC's would be happy and would make friends, although they always did.

Education and health provision. It's so different everywhere, and dd2 has cerebral palsy. That and the prospect of knowing that if we went back to the uk we would be at the bottom of every waiting list, and have to reapply for statement of sen etc etc etc.

(oh, and actually being allowed in, what with the disability and all. We used to ship the wheelchair and carry her through security pretending she was tired, and then use a push chair until the shipping caught up.)

Leaving my work behind & considering a career change every 3 years + Finding a school placement for DC.

We were appart for a year as I had just set up a little business and we had no school places for DC in new posting.

I think worries change as DC grow up.

Inky and madwoman have highlted the 2 major factors that in any circumstance would really put me off. We have been very fortunate so far to not have tjose major worries.

OP, am really mot belittling your concern. It IS your main preoccupation right now. Been there too with DS1, language barrier etc....i was soooo relieved when i found the right group. It was my lifeline for that year!

The justice system.

savoycabbage, It was one of my concerns because I think it represented meeting new friends for me and dcs (who were 1 and 2 at the time). Security was a big worry too as I was going to 'big bad amerca' and had watched far too much crime drama!

I agree with laptopwieldingharpy worries change as children grow we are thinking about another move and my worries are very different.

We have only done 1 move abroad with the kids, and only had the eldest when we moved, and she was only 20 months. I did worry about taking her away from her friends, which sounds mad with a young toddler! I have a 16 month old now and it sounds mad in his context! But DD was very verbal and had a group of tots she had seen pretty much daily from birth and was forming quiet strong bonds with, who she talked about when not with, I really did feel sad to take her away from them! Stilldazed the playgroup issue applied to us to, as I wanted to help her find new friends, integrate, feel at home and pick up the language (which I didn't speak either beyond a few basics) asap.

I had worries for myself mostly based around language, and a lot of them were valid, especially as we turned out to be living somewhere where there isn't really a choice to join the "ex-pat" circuit even if I wanted to, but those are not really child specific beyond the fact I am mostly a SAHM so not making friends at the office etc.

Our move is supposed to be permanent but if we moved again my worries would centre around schooling and the kids making friends and settling, as the older 2 are nearly 7 and nearly 5 now, totally different to toddlers. I wouldn't choose to move countries once kids have started school unless it was essential due to work becoming impossible to find locally or similar. I don't think I could bring myself to move somewhere security was a big issue with kids, though I would have done pre kids or after they grew up.

my dd was born overseas but when we moved to the next place, I was concerned in particular about education since that was my worst experience in the place we had been in prior to the move.

I think education, health care and security are pivotal concerns really.