Has being an expat changed you or your children?

[louisea]

Do you feel different from those you left behind in your home country? Do your kids feel different from their family members or their school friends when they come back to the UK?

Yes and yes. But all in a good way. Mostly.

We are returning to the Uk this summer after 10 yrs abroad. Kids were 3 and 1 when we left. It will be tough for them and they will pretty much have to learn to keep quiet about all their marvelous experiences as no-one really wants to know.

That's the sort of thing I was thinking. We spent 3 years overseas and my kids have had to learn to keep things to themselves. I find that I have a much broader view of life than many people I come in to contact with. I was also an expat kid and moved schools many times so know what they are going through. I get asked a lot about our time overseas but I can see from people's faces that they aren't really interested.

Def. My almost 11 DD has a much broader view of the world than her peers. She is slightly less streetwise and much less fashionable but, she has had life experiences that they can't imagine.
One boy in her class challenged her having been to Cambodia. Apparently it doesn't exist except in her mind.
My DD is tolerant and accepting of everyone, although that could be as a result of our parenting. She is curious and confident.
I wish I was her!

My kids are having the kind of upbringing I couldn't have dreamed of now we are living in Sydney. 13yo DS has just come home from school - he went paddle boarding for school sport today and is now swimming in our pool. DD has performed at the Opera House twice with her choir. All our kids were born in Brighton and we enjoyed our life there, but they have a much better lifestyle (and education) here.

Being expats with no relations here has also really strengthened the bonds between my kids ( even though there are big age gaps between them) and brought out family closer.

Funnily enough I was talking to my neighbour about this earlier - her kids are older than mine so its perhaps more relevant. On one hand the kids have had some fabulous experiences - either travelling to "exotic" countries or a little bit more "luxury" than back home in the UK be it swimming pools in the backyard or particularly here in Asia help in the house. On the other hand they have to learn that it may seem they are "showing off" to other people and how to manage that.
She had a problem between her kids and their cousins, where they compared vacations - camping in South of France versus 5* luxury in Thailand. Apparently it all got very heated and has left some simmering resentment which is hard to repair at a distance. But it was a useful lesson to her kids about how to handle similar situations. It could be that people are jealous or uncomfortable as opposed to not interested.

Being an immigrant is going to changes your life in many ways. My children are not the people they would have been if we hadn't moved to Australia because their experiences are different every day. For example,my eight year old knows that she can be prime minister because the prime minister is female like her.

Good on that girl of yours, savoy.:)