Die Kaffeestube - German and Austrian cyber Kaffee und Kuchen

[admylin]

Kaffeeklatsch for anyone in a German speaking country or interested in German, Kommt herein und setz euch!

Sorry if I've missed it, but why is he called bidet boy? Dare I ask! :)

Wow, admylin, must have been some storm! We had a storm too, (probably the same night, but I can't remember - my days blur!), but everything here is intact! DS loved looking out of the window at the lightning.

thatis, great that your youngest is walking, hurray! No rest for you now, ha! :)

So, we have found an apartment to move into, we move at the start of July, I cannot wait! Am still unpacked, as I knew we'd be moving again and I didn't want to unpack only to have to pack and unpack again (lazy!). So, six weeks or so, then I can feel more settled. Still feel a bit like I am on holiday! It is in a great location, but doesn't have the garden I really hoped for. It is super close to the best spielplatz I have seen though, so swings and roundabouts (heh heh).

Hello to everyone!

Glad you've found a decent place to live now No Hun :)

It's actually much easier now DC3 is walking - he actually crawls really, really, really fast so walking makes no difference to escape speed or having to chase him about, and the huge plus is that when we are out and about I can let him down if he walks - he is very hard to contain at DS1's football training for example, I have been putting him in his waterproof trousers, overshoes and coat and letting him crawl as he is impossible to contain in arms or a buggy (well obviously it is not impossible but he makes his displeasure known very loudly indeed) if we are standing still. Other mums look at me like I'm utterly crazy when I let a crawling baby down on wet grass, but as DS1 hates to be left at football its all a bit catch 22. Walking tot = much easier life and less funny looks when he has older but still little siblings!

Great news NoHun and hope the move goes smoothly. Same goes for Silken!

Thatis congratulations to ds2 on learning to walk! I found once my 2 could toddle they wouldn't sit long in their double buggy so I had to walk along slowly pushing an empty pram. Took us half an hour to get down the road to the nearest playground!

House full of girls coming today as it's a day off school due to the oral Abi exams taking place. dd has to do a project for chemistry on Rostschutz with 4 other girls! Should be interesting as I can't think of alot that they can find out and share out so that each one of them has something to say when they present it. I suggested starting with explaining what rust is - but wa stold, no way that subject has been given to a different group and they can only talk about prevention!

Just off to bed but wanted to say congrats to nohun on finding a new apartment! Hope to get on again tomorrow.

Admylin how bizarre, a 5 person rust prevention talk? Perhaps they could talk about rust on all sorts of different surfaces to spin it out - rusty cars, rusty gates, rusty nails, rusty brains... maybe not the last one...

My kids have never been buggy fans, not sure why - DS1 was happy enough as long as we were moving, but DD never liked the buggy (until she was too big to need it, then she thought it was fun to hop in). So I have always had tiny walkers and an empty buggy :) When I was childminding in the UK I used to put the non walker (and even when she finally walked reluctant and slow walker for a long time) in the single and have my 11 month old and a minded 18 month old on reigns one each side - they were very well trained to walk to heel ;) I did get everywhere very slowly, but then again it was kind of my job so walking along at half a mile an hour was fine somehow!

When DS1 was 18 months old he learned to pedal his tractor ride-on and used to insist on going everywhere on it - he and I used to spend whole mornings walking/ riding to the next village playground (there is one right by our house but we go to the next one, 1.5 km, for a walk) it would literally take us 2 hours to get there, then after a play I'd leave the tractor there, carry him home, get in the car and drive to KiGa to pick DD up (DS1 would fall asleep) and then drive by the other playground to pick the tractor up and put it in the boot! Now that was probably a little ridiculous, but it made for a nice calm toddler boy the rest of the day :o !

Oh that reminds me DS2 learned to kick a ball this morning - toddled up to it, lifted his foot carefully, batted the ball with his toes, put his foot carefully back down, and grinning looked around to make sure he had an audience, and gave himself a big round of applause :o Very sweet and very funny (then Ds1 tried to spend the next 5 mins playing football in the living room with him, has anyone seen Wilde Kerle 1, the scene at the beginning where they all play football indoors because it's raining... cue swift departure for the Kiga run!)

I am sitting in the car as after KiGa run I went to the supermarket and DS2 fell asleep in the car on the way home, and it's tipping down with rain. I unpacked the shopping and came back to the car with a cup of tea and the laptop! Hoping he'll sleep a few more mins then we'll drive to toddlers group (maybe he'll show off his ball kicking and toddling :) )

Hope the weather improveds for your move date Silken - moving your stuff in the pouring rain would be rubbish.

Great news on the apartment, NoHun.

That sounds like a tricky project, admylin. I shall definitely be delegating anything vaguely scientific to DH when the DC go to secondary school. As well as maths (I have enough problems with primary school maths here, despite being quite good at it when I was at school). And German, obviously. I think I'll probably be left with English and music.

Thatis I had the same problem with DD2 and the buggy; she wouldn't sit in it when it would actually have been quite useful (I remember it taking us well over an hour to walk home from the doctor's once), but by the time we got it out again for DS she decided she quite liked it after all. All the quarrelling they used to do over it was one of the reasons we decided to get rid of it.

DD1 had her last Schularbeit (maths) yesterday; it's definitely a relief to have them out of the way. She got her German Schularbeit back yesterday too and got a 4, despite the hours of revision she'd done with DH.

DS is still being very clingy and has refused to go into KiGa every morning so far this week, so has had to be dragged away from me kicking and screaming. I had a meeting with his teacher last week as she wanted to know whether there had been any changes at home that might explain his recent clinginess; he's very clingy with her too apparently, as well as showing other signs of nervousness (going to the toilet 10-15 times a morning, for example). The only thing I could think of is that DH (who DS is very attached to) has been away quite a lot recently, but I have no idea whether that's really the cause.

Linzer poor ds, something must be bothering him. Hope you get to the bottom of it. Was your dd1 upset with the 4?

thatis dd used to love Wilde Kerle! Hope your living room survives the indoor football if it keeps raining though!

Phew, the talk on rust prevention is finished and nicely presented in a power point presentation for next week! Now we're trying to get used to having a rabbit hopping around the house as dd is looking after one for her friend. Ds has just got his first round of braces to wear after school and at night time and is not too happy about them.

Thanks for all the kind wishes, you lot are lovely. We are very happy to have found somewhere decent, places are getting snapped up so fast, and so many apartments have refused us as we have a child, so limiting our options. Now to find some nice furniture (anyone got any shop recommendations for a sofa, bed, wardrobes and a chest of drawers please, oh, and a dining table with chairs, that is not IKEA?).

Linzer, I think extra cuddles for your DS, give him one from me too! Poor little mite, hope he is ok, and your DH is around more. DH is working hard at the moment, long days, we both miss him. Yesterday was nice, the day off!

Hope you are all having a lovely Friday.

Linzer poor DS, but I think a lot of KiGa kids (boys especially but a few girls) seem to go through these clingy phases - a boy in DS1's group is doing it now, and you can see his mum is torn between being concerned or sorry for him and being rather embarrassed, as he's a strapping 6 year old! It's rather more easy to be sympathetic with a little 3 year old who's only been at KiGa a few months than a 4 year old in his 3rd year in the same group who has no obvious reason for the dramatics! But sometimes it is the oddest little thing. Could it be something that has happened at KiGa rather than missing your DH? Some seemingly tiny altercation or falling out with another child? DD was always the most confident and outgoing little girl then she had a phase like that and it turned out eventually that her best friend was telling her to do things she didn't want to - nothing sinister, boundary testing really, things like say something nasty to another girl,or put your hand on a rough bit of the climbing frame where another child got a splinter (the splinter one was what dd first told me, but she alarmed me initially by saying her friend had tried to make her put her hand on a nail! Luckily that was a nearly 4 yo vocab fail! dd was saying no and not doing the things, but it was upsetting her. Although it was hard at the time I think it was a learning curve for dd, which in the end improved her self esteem, taught her about standing up for herself and dealing with her peers, and she subsequently widened her friendship circle and is now one of 8 girls who even now are all good friends, although she is still friends with her old best friend they are no longer joined at the hip like they were for the entire first year of KiGa.

The whole grades thing is sounding more and more dispiriting, at least they don't have grades in the first class but all that is creeping closer come Sept, argh! Hope your dd isn't too upset about the 4.

No Hun I don't know if the furniture chains are the same throughout Germany, but we got some good solid kids bedroom furniture in Roller - much more sturdy and reasuring than Ikea, a lot of Ikea stuff seems flimsey to me. Other than that we brought most stuff with us - we bought new wardrobes, linen chests (no airing cupboard) and a sofa from a catalogue, but not only can I not remember the name, but the stuff has not stood the test of time brilliantly 5 years later and I wouldn't recommend. Enjoy your new flat!

admylin glad you (your dd) got the rust prevention talk done! Good luck with the braces!

DH finished at his old job on Wed and has a new job starting the second week of June! He is now off for nearly a month (just over a week of which we'll be in the UK)! He was off on his motorbike today though, visiting a friend of his who he used to do freelance programming work with when they were both students, who now owns a relatively large IT company and is living in a penthouse with a hottub on the terrace - single of course... Think it may be inducing something of a mid-life crisis in DH, who returned to a messy rented house and the hubbub of 3 small kids... He is asleep on the other sofa now, fell asleep at some point an hour or two ago while I was putting all 3 kids to bed and cleaning up the kitchen from dinner...

Congratulations to your DH on his new job, Thatis! That's great that he's got nearly a month off in between jobs and that he can come back to the UK with you.
I really don't know what's causing DS's clinginess; DH being away a lot was just an idea, but the only one I could come up with. He used to absolutely love going to KiGa and would want to go even if he was ill, but now he complains of tummy ache most mornings. A good friend of his moved to another KiGa at the start of the year and another friend of his is going to be moving (to another town) soon, but his best friend is still there. From what his teacher said, he seems quite happy once I've left him, just a bit nervous (running off to the toilet all the time, his voice going higher in situations when he's not sure of himself, etc.) and she thinks he's scared of failure. Maybe there's not even a specific cause and it's just a phase he's going through.

NoHun I'm no help on the furniture I'm afraid, as we got virtually everything from Ikea when we lived in Germany - and still have it all now. Only the children's (Flexa) beds aren't from Ikea.
Sympathies on your DH's long hours; I used to find it really hard when the DC were little. I must confess I'm looking forward to some evenings to myself next week (DH is going to be in Eastern Europe most of the week), but I hope it doesn't affect DS too badly - and the other two miss him as well, of course.

admylin I think DD1 was a bit disappointed, but she didn't say a lot about it. Her dyslexia tutor thought the mark was very unfair as she'd only made one spelling mistake and one grammatical mistake and has improved a lot over the last year, and said she hopes she gets a more understanding German teacher at her next school. All this focus on tests and grades is obviously playing on my mind too, as I dreamt last night that DD1 got a 2 in her German Schularbeit - we won't find out until Monday or Tuesday, though.
Hope the rabbit behaved itself!

The DC are all up despite watching the final of Dancing Stars last night. DS fell asleep in front of the TV so I carried him up to bed at around 9 pm, but the girls were still up when we went to bed at 10 pm and I didn't hear them come up, so I must have been asleep before them. I'm sure they would have slept for longer if DS hadn't woken them, however...

Linzer I wonder if your ds has picked up on the fact that he'll be in Vorschule and some of the others will be leaving for primary school?

I remember my ds was very upset when some of the boys in his group left to join primary - ds wasn't old enough to start but he'd made friends in a mixed age group so was left with only 1 friend a year younger and the 3 older ones. Dd was so sad that her best friends were going to start primary that I put her in school a year early!

Better get on, sending some job applications for dh and watching the rabbit hop around - it likes trying to eat the baskets on my coffee table!

Thatis, I am LOVING your juxtapositioning of hottub and hubbub for single man vs family man! Genius! :)
Congratulations to your DH on his new job - enjoy the month off. We had similar when my DH got this job, was so lovely to have him home.

And thanks for the Roller info re furniture.

Linzer, does your DS have to go to KiGa? Could you just keep him off for a while, until he seems happier?
Thanks re the sympathy re DH's long hours. He assures me this is not going to be a 'thing' though, but while he is new, and the project is at the stage it's at, he feels he should put in the hours. It's not so much that I find it hard - I don't - I only have the one DS, and he is such a pleasure, easy-going and fun, I just hate that DH is missing out, and DS missing out on spending more time with DH. Though DS does keep late hours, so he is still wide awake when DH comes home!

Quick post since we don't have internet yet. Move went fine and we've nearly unpacked and put away everything. DD loves her new room, but I think she's suffering a bit as we've been neglecting her while we unpack. Planning to make it up to her once she wakes up from her nap, though .

Will catch up properly once we have proper internet again (knowing Deutsche Telekom probably in January...)

Glad the move went well, silken. Am very impressed at how quickly you've unpacked; I seem to remember it taking us weeks if not months.

NoHun Keeping DS off KiGa isn't really an option for my sanity as the last KiGa year is obligatory here (although there's slightly more flexibility than there is with school wrt hours). His KiGa teacher also agreed that allowing him to stay at home when he doesn't want to go isn't ideal, especially as he only has just over a month left at KiGa - he'll be at home for nine weeks then, anyway.

We've stopped the couple of afternoon activities he went to (we'd already paid the annual fee for Kinderturnen, although it wasn't very much) and are making an effort to spend more one-on-one time with him (DH took him for an ice cream at the weekend, for example), but he's being very difficult at the moment. He refused to go on his bike to KiGa this morning (but I really didn't want to give in and go in the car, so told him that we were cycling and that was that), cried the entire way back when we went out on the bikes for an ice cream yesterday and DH said he was whining the whole time for sweets and ice cream when he took him swimming yesterday.

admylin He seems quite happy about going to Vorschule; as long as he's starting at the same school as DD2 and will be with his best friend (he doesn't have any other close friends starting school), he doesn't seem to mind whether he's in the Vorschulklasse or in the 1. Klasse. His clinginess started before school enrolment; it was his refusal to take part that meant we were called in to see the headteacher and started considering Vorschule.

It's a nice sunny day here today; I've been out for a run and then a bike ride to the optician's (?120 for two boxes of contact lenses! I'm definitely being more assertive about buying them from somewhere else next time) and the bank. Bumped into two of our neighbours when I got home and joked that I was doing a triathlon and off swimming next, but they actually believed me until I put them straight. It made me think how rarely I can use my normal sense of humour here; if I try to be sarcastic, I tend to get taken seriously.

Morning!

silken - went to text you yesterday to ask how things were getting on then couldnt find my phone, got distracted then forgot. Sorry thats a pitiful excuse but sadly true. Glad it all went well - impressed that you're unpacked already - we had boxes in the cellar for months. Is it everything you hope it would be now that your furniture is in?

nohun - thats great news that you've found a better flat. I can also sympathise about the long hours - my dh still does fairly long hours (he's out the house 7.30 - 6 most days) but thats better than when we were in the UK so I'm not complaining too much. We bought lots of furniture from XXXL - they've got stuff at a whole variety of prices.

admylin - where are the jobs this time? You must be thoroughly fed up filling out applications. Hoep the rust prevention talk went well. Seems a very random topic.

linzer - grrrr to the marking system - I'm sure that would never have been a 4 in the UK. dd got a 2 in a maths test the other week but had 25/30!!!! Not sure how over 80% is a 2 so i'm sure your dd's 4 was also not fair. But that doesnt help her in the school system here. Hope ds settles down a bit once he gets into the Vorschule - maybe its just all the uncertainty about leaving kiga thats making him clingy.

thatis - congrats to your dh on his new job and fab news that he has a month off. And it seems like the weather is nice so enjoy the time with him.

Worked out this morning its only 30 days till I go to the UK! eeeeeeeeee! But my BIL phoned last night to say the christening of his dd (the very PFB!!) will be on the Sunday I fly back so dh is going to have to go with the 3 dc on his own. Its nearly a 4 hour drive from here - there may be frayed tempers by the time he gets there but his parents will obviously be there to help him once he gets there. Not slightly bothered to miss it (think that makes me sound like a cow) but we are so unreligious that it feels hypocritical to be involved. He asked dh to be the godfather and he agreed which doesnt sit well with me either. What do people buy as christening presents? Or do they give money?

We had a really nice long weekend - there was a 3 day fest in the village which involved eating too many steaks and the dc eating too many sausages and drinking too much lemonade. Will be glad to get us back to a normal diet this week.

x posts linzer. I ordered my lenses from Apollo this time and they were 115 euros so about the same. But dh found very similar ones on the internet for 80euros and wants me to cancel the apollo order. But I'm not brave enough at the moment. Think i'll order the first 6 months from apollo then never again.

I agree that the British sense of humour doesnt always translate here. Thankfully dh was in the UK long enough that he has it too so I get to use it on him.

Silken glad the move went well and hope you get your connection up and running soon. We were always lucky with telekom.

NoHun hope work settles soon. Will your new place be near your dh's work place?

Linzer the Germans don't get that sort of humour either! I've given up even trying. Hope your ds cheers up soon.

Ploom that sounds like great timing for you so you get out of the church trip! Bet your counting the days to your UK visit.
Yes, am fed up of not knowing where we'll be in a couple of years but so is dh and although we'd like to stay here they really are unfair at work. He's working really hard helping and supervising a chinese student who has a deadline and wants to leave and the boss will take the credit in the end. Anyway, applied to one in Berlin and Sweden yesterday (don't fancy Sweden).

Ds will be 14 tomorrow. I have failed in getting him an outfit as dd and I went into the city on Friday but couldn't even get the car parked so came straight back home, went in on Saterday on the bus and couldn't find anything nice as it was too busy so gave up and had a bubble tea with dd instead. Have got some books and sweets for him so will just give him money.

Silken glad the move went well and I´m very impressed with the speed of your unpacking.

admylin I hope your dh finds something soon. I wouldn´t fancy Sweden either, I think I´d get depressed by the short days in winter.

Linzer ´Does ds enjoy Kiga when he´s there? Our ds hated his last year at Kiga. He turned into such a whinger, but I didn´t really connect it with Kiga because he was like it the whole time and I thought it was just his personality. Once he started school he was like a new child, much happier and more like his old self. Maybe your ds will enjoy the change when he goes to Vorschule. It must be frustating not knowing the cause of his clinginess.

Ploom your village seems to have a different fete every week. It must be great to live somewhere with such a sense of community.

Dh was in France at the weekend, so I took the dc to Serengeti Park. It´s just north of Hannover near Hodenhagen and we had a great time. Dd enjoyed it so much she said it was one of the best days of her life. I think it´s probably too far away for most of you, but it´s definitely worth a visit if you´re in the area.

hupa It's reassuring to hear that your DS was much happier once he started school. I don't think DS's clinginess is particularly connected to KiGa either as he's the same the whole time, refusing to go to afternoon activities or even to friends who he doesn't know very well, and often quite difficult at home too. The DDs seem like a breeze in comparison! (DD2 used to be very hard work too, with frequent temper tantrums, but has got much easier over the last few months.)

admylin I like the idea of Sweden but think that life there can be quite difficult for outsiders. The winter weather would put me off too. If I had to learn a new language, I'd go for a Scandinavian one but I really wouldn't fancy starting a language from scratch now.

Ploom Now that I know my new prescription, I'll definitely be buying my next lenses via the Internet; I've got six months' worth, but my next check-up is in two years' time so I have a couple of years to build up my assertiveness!

None of the DC's godparents, bar one, are particularly religious but for me it's more about them having a special connection with their godparents, which doesn't have to be particularly religious (I know that's probably hypocritical). Gift-wise, children seem to be given presents rather than money (the German guests at the christening we went to last year also gave an actual present, although I didn't see what it was). We've given/received a cutlery set, books, a plate/bowl/cup set, a little wooden train with a letter on each carriage making up DS's name, etc. - I think that anything the child can keep/use for years to come is acceptable. We bought a personalised cutlery set for my goddaughter from Jako-o, but ended up giving it to her for her birthday instead as I was worried about it being confiscated if we tried to take it to her christening (we only had hand luggage)!

hupa Yes, DS does seem to enjoy KiGa once he's actually there - he always seems very happy when I go to pick him up, running round and playing with his friends, and not shy at all.

Hupa I'm in Hannover so I'll have to look at that Serengeti park - did you stay in a hotel or was it just a day trip?

Linzer I think dc go through phases and are changing all the time as they grow older so it's hopefully just a phase with your ds and school/vorschule will be a new start for him.

I've offered a few ideas to ds for his birthday and he wants to go bowling with some friends at the weekend. We'll have to go by bus as we only have room for 5 in the car but should be OK as there is a direct bus from the corner of our street to the bowling place. I'm not planning on joining in as they're at that age where they'd rather be left to it but I'll go pay for it, go shopping or something and then go back to pay for the drinks they'll have had. Anyone know how long it takes to play 2 games/rounds at bowling?

I would think it would be less than an hour to do two games with that amount of children, Linzer, so you won't get much shopping done!

Well done on the move silken. You've done so well to get unpacked so quickly.

I hope your dh finds something quickly admylin as he gets such a rough ride there.

My dh is finally back home. His case arrived two days later. I am hoping he gets out of the cycle of working till midnight on his laptop. It's such a pain, but I can't see it ending. Americans have such a long hours culture.

My ds1 is going through a funny, clingy phase at the moment too. Every morning he claims he doesn't want to go to pre-school (this morning he said he was going to be sick) but when I go to pick him up he doesn't want to leave!

Sorry if I've missed anyone. Ds2 is also in a funny mood! Must be a Monday morning/after the eclipse hangover. Hope you're all having a good evening.

Sorry, it's not Linzer taking the kids bowling ( I thought that was young to leave them!) Admylin, I do apologise! It still doesn't take all that long once they have started.

aaarrrgghh
tooth absess
dh still away
my mum is coming in a few days

and however much I hoover the house still a mess

keels over in a corner

Cinders same here it's never ending isn't it? I'm quite minimalistic but still feel we have too much stuff.

jenny I was hoping it'd be 2 hours atleast, maybe I should book 3 games? Hope your dh gets some time off soon. Sounds abit like my dh though - he can sit in his office all day at work then come home and sit at the computer all night! Was quite nice when the internet was down as he HAD to rest in the evening!

Just been for ds's birthday cake - bought one but at the weekend I'll be making a couple myself for him and his friends! It's heading for 29° today, might go and get the ventilator from the cellar.