Wenn es im Winter stürmt und schneit, haben wir eine Flasche Glühwein allzeit bereit - life in Germany and Austria

[LinzerTorte]

As I couldn't find a suitable poem mentioning Glühwein, I composed my own. Please don't laugh.

All welcome - anyone living in Germany, Austria or anywhere else who would like to chat.

But I have been cheered up by an e-mail telling me I've got a copy of January's Book of the Month - I always seem to miss out normally, so I am .

Canella I'm also at that English teacher. It would be one thing to demand one version be used over the other in a piece of written work, but to expect a native speaker to limit what language they use when speaking is madness. I really hope the teacher told a colleague or posted on a chat site about the incident and was shot down put right.

It's very worrying, though, that it's happened to other people's dc as well. Mind you, DH's nephew has a terrible English teacher this year. She set them a test entitled "Find the phrase", after ten minutes she had to explain that the sentences were definitions and they should write down the word being defined. There were (imo) several correct possible answers for most of the sentences, allegedly the teacher refused to accept some of them, but one sentence made no sense whatsoever and the more I read it the less sense it made. Nephew had given the (correct) answer "knowledge", which I would have never come up with since the definition contained the word "know". Having failed to answer one question and apparently having given an incorrect answer elsewhere, I would have received a 2 for the test .

Linzer you must be a bigger person than me, I would never agree to teach for no money . I'm not surprised you're tempted to give up, especially if you feel the only people who appreciate it are your own dds.

Can I ask another question about potty training to you experienced mums, please? The potty training topic is full of people asking questions, but no-one with any answers seems to read it.

DD is doing okay during the day, she sometimes tells me when she needs to go, although usually only after she's leaked a bit, but she doesn't have many full-on wee accidents any more (one a week, maybe?) Poos have become a bit of an issue for her, she holds them in for up to three days, but I've learnt to recognize when she's trying to stop one coming and put a nappy on her. I'm hoping she will stop being frightened of pooing when she realises I will always give her a nappy and then I can try to bribe her into doing them on the potty later. Any thoughts?

The other question is, how do you know when to leave the nighttime nappy off? Since pt DD is virtually dry overnight: she always does an enormous wee in the morning and her nappy seems to be dry as far as I can tell when it's disposable. I have put her in a cloth nappy overnight now and then, but she seems less inhibited about weeing in them, although two nights ago the cloth nappy was bone dry in the morning. My instinct says to wait until she is reliably telling me when she needs to go during the day, am I risking missing the critical period by doing so, do you think?

I would say to leave the night-time nappy off once your DD has been dry at night for several nights in a row, silken - you can always go back to putting her in nappies if it doesn't work out, but I think sometimes they get a bit lazy if they have a nappy on. DD2's night time nappies were always full in the morning, but she suddenly decided that she didn't need a nappy at night any more and was dry (apart from the occasional accident) more or less straight away. If your DD's disposable nappies seem to be dry in the morning, I would definitely take the risk of leaving them off overnight.

Refusing to poo on the potty seems to be quite common but it's not a problem the DC ever had so I don't have any advice, I'm afraid.

Btw I don't know about bigger - probably just less assertive.

had to make myself have a computer free morning - needed to go food shopping (again - seem to spend my life food shopping - well yoghurt shopping!) and then needed to wrap the Christmas presents - thankfully my dc arent snoopers but the presents were all just lying unwrapped in my wardrobe. But they're all done now and hidden in the sauna room that no-one ever goes into!

ladder - I would keep her in her nighttime nappies until you've had quite a lot of consecutive dry nights - she's doing amazingly well to be dry some nights at her age. Mine were all over 3 before they got it (and dd nearer 4!). I've not experienced the poo problem with my dc either but my instinct would be to bribe her to poo on the potty/toilet (this is nearly always my answer to toilet problems).

linzer - I'm cross on your behalf that no-one acknowledged the unpaid job you do. I would be seriously considering telling them where to stick it (but in a polite way of course).

oh daisygator - you are having the hardest time stopping. Think you really need to go proper cold turkey since any slight demand on your boobs seems to be producing quite a supply. Will think drying up thoughts!

5more - i love babies aged between 6 & 12 months - they are at such a cute age. Now if he could just learn to sleep......

cinders - I quite like my dh going away once in a while and I'm sure he thinks the same about me - well maybe not since he's rubbish coping with all 3 dc on his own. Your dh will be back tomorrow. Hope the school can give you some advice about your ds.

Glad all you native English speakers agreed that the English teacher was wrong to correct dd's spoken English. I'm not going to make a point of going to speak to her but will probably go to the next parents evening and say something then. Was lying in bed last night thinking of all the things I really wanted to say to her but like Linzer I'm not that assertive. Think it was admylins dc who had marks deducted in a test for using grammer the class hadnt been taught. I think its just typical of the rigid school system here (altho most of the time I'm quite happy with it).

5more - I#m actually quite impressed with how un-annoying the recorder is when ds1 plays it. It's the first time he's played a musical instrument but he was surprisingly good yesterday. He has a natural rhythm and it wasnt squeaky at all. dd used to play the violin in the UK - now that was painful!

Linzer I did buy the gel pads you suggested! They don't stay cold for long but a gel pad plus a freezer bag of frozen peas on each side seems to do the trick for a while! I was still leaking earlier today but haven't fed from either side since about 3am & I haven't exploded yet, fingers crossed...
I'm just waiting for DS to wake up from his nap so I can (bottle) feed him & nip to pick up the tablets.
Good news on your book club book! I like the idea of a book club but never really got round to joining one. I used to work in a huge chain bookshop too so that would have been a prime opportunity. Booksellers can be real book snobs though!

Canella I am now going cold turkey (literally - all these frozen goods are making me really cold!)
I think it would be worth raising with DD's teacher at parent's (parents'?) evening, even if only in a light-hearted, surely-this-can't-be-true knid of way. Maybe she doesn't realise how ridiculous it is.

Ladder It sounds like the potty training is going well! Not long now until you can purge your house of nappies :)

Cinders Sorry, I missed the fact that your DH is already away when I posted my last comment.

Not sure if it's coincidence as he will be 3 months old on Sunday, or if it really is to do with bottle-feeding, or whether it is just because the poor little mite has a cold, but I've been able to put DS down in his cot for his daytime naps for the past few days! I can get up, use my arms, EAT - the world is my oyster

Cor, only off MN for 3 weeks and the thread is flying past!
I had a week and a half of massive work stress- large customer project on very tight deadlines and absolutely heaving with internal company politics. Enough to have me not sleeping/ getting mouth ulcers from it alongside a huge chest infection and I lost my voice. That done, a weekend with my sister and a long weekend of my parents coming over. Mum hadn't been properly to Vienna before so we did the usual things in the centre; Schonnbrunn, Stefansdom, all the Christmas markets from there to the Naschmarkt. I'm so tired now and have done next to nothing for Christmas yet.

We did finally get to M+S Bratislava though, didn't pick up any mince pies but there were lovely crumpets and christmas pud that I was pleased to see. Got DD loads of clothes too in the 1-2 years size. It is more or less time now to clear out the clothes that a bit tight on her, I hate throwing out her small clothes, it makes me really sad even when there are much nicer ones coming/ ready to go .

Our nanny is having interesting times too- she came in last Wednesday and dissolved into tears. Her BF had clearly been cheating on her as she got an email from another girl saying he was seeing her and would be leaving nanny by summer. It probably wasn't even just one girl either from what she said. Poor thing was in bits about it. They are both mid-20's, Hungarian, just moved to Vienna for work early this year. I had no idea what to do but managed to get home at lunchtime to give her a halfday to go home to see family/ friends. She turned up Monday though so hopefully he is just being thrown out and she will stay in Austria.

We had a Nikolosackerl here. DH was insistent and did it all himself, including loading up all our wellies with chocolate basically. 16 months old DD is now having quite some toddlery-cross patches and won't even contemplate breakfast at the moment until she's had the chocolate out of her advent calendar. I can see immense paddies when she realises it's just December and not forever!

Sorry that is all me-me-me. I will try and keep up on the thread but very best Christmassy wishes to you all in the meantime.

Morning all,

Welcome back C4o, hope work has calmed down and that you're feeling better now. I felt quite sad when I got rid of all the DC's baby clothes and regret not keeping one or two items now (the only thing we still have is DD1's little knitted Christmassy hat from the hospital) but I'm actually quite glad to be able to get rid of things now as it means more space in the wardrobe and cupboards! We get quite a lot of clothes pass on to us and I also stock up on bigger sized items in the sale, so we have boxes going up to 164 for the girls (that's virtually my size! in fact, I tried on an old coat of DH's niece's and it actually fitted me) and for about the next 3-4 years for DS...

Gator I did join a RL bookclub last year, but only went once as I just don't have the energy to go into Vienna in the evenings, let alone come up with insightful comments. I also joined one of the MN book swap clubs, but apart from the fact that it hasn't really worked out, the ridiculous amount that it now costs to send books to the UK means that I would have had to drop out at the end of the year anyway. So the MN Book of the Month seems like a good compromise!
Good news on the daytime naps btw; you must feel liberated.

Canella I didn't find the recorder too annoying when the DDs used to play either, although the fact that they hardly ever practised probably helped. Agree about the violin, though; one of the girls at the piano concert last week accompanied her sister on the violin, and that did make me wince!
We already have quite a few presents under the tree, but amazingly the DC have accepted that they're not allowed to examine them too closely - I'd take them back upstairs and hide them otherwise.

Must get on with preparing today's two English lessons; the last two of the year (at school), thank goodness.

Morning. Just sitting down with a cup of tea after wrapping presents, doing washing and shopping for jeans. Ds went to school in his smallest pair that are too tight round the waist after putting all his others in the wash. I decided to get him another pair as he really is down to 3 pairs of jeans. He's definately growing again as I put 2 pairs out last week that had got too small.

C4ro, hope work settles down abit soon and hope your nanny decides to stay. Is she going home over Christmas? I don't feel as if I've done much for Christmas yet either but it's nice if your dh does abit too (like for Nilolaus). All I've done is click on the order now button on amazon up to now!

Linzer, very clever of you to have a stock of bigger clothes, my dc suddenly grow over night I'm sure! I was also surprised when I realised that after size 164 they can shop in the adult section. Hope the english lesosn goes well. I was thinking, maybe you'll get a little surprise as dankeshön on your last lesson.

Canella, I think it's best not to say anything about the English. It's just one of those things and our dc have just learn to accept it. Ds had a great English teacher last year who spoke good English, had obviously spent a fair bit of time in the UK and always got ds and the other half Englsih boy to stand up and read loud to help the other dc. This year the teacher is abit older and has a German accent and doesn't treat ds and the other boy any differently and never asks their opinion on how to pronounce words. Ds still manages to get a 1 but dd makes spelling mistakes and is too quiet so she has a 3 in English.

Hi, C4ro. Sounds like you've been very busy lately. Hope you get a chance to relax and enjoy the build-up to Christmas. Have you actually thrown out your DD's clothes or have you just put them away? I've kept everything so far on the off-chance that (a) we might manage to have another baby at some point and (b) that it might be another girl. I still feel a twinge though when I put away outfits that I particularly loved on DD. They seem to have endless "Baby Bazaars" here, so when I start drowning in baby clothes I can probably make some money from them (at least the nice stuff from M&S).

Linzer and Canella thanks for pondering my toilet training questions. I'm not really in any hurry to night train and I certainly wasn't expecting DD to start having any dry nights at this age, but it does seem to happen in quite a few children from what I've read on here.

DD's cloth nappy was wet this morning, though, and she only did a little puddle on the potty. This is the most frustrating thing for me, as she hasn't had a heavy disposable nappy overnight for weeks and weeks. I think possibly the extra material of the cloth nappy presses on her tummy when she lies on her front and that stops her being able to hold on. However, throwing away dry disposables in the morning seems like such a waste when a dry (or wet) cloth nappy can go in any wash.

Gina Ford (not normally a fan of hers, but her potty training book is humane and sensible) reckons very few under-3s should be night-trained as they can't consistently hold it all night. However, I think she means it will interfere with the unbroken 12 hours respite from their dc that GF parents are supposed to get overnight. I suspect that when DD tries to get into our bed in the middle of the night, she actually needs to wee. She did demand to use the potty at 1am one night this week and did a large wee, but she had already leaked into the nappy a bit. I can't decide whether taking the nappies away completely might help DD to recognize when she needs a wee before she starts leaking, or whether she needs to learn that before I can leave them off completely.

Crossposted with admystletoe. I'm really surprised your dd gets 3s in English! Is it partly down to her dyslexia, do you think? English spelling is a right pain, I suppose.

Ladder, yes the 3 is due to her dyslexia but only partly, she is too quiet and 50% is for oral participation and it's a gymnasium so they are very strict with marking and take points off for every minor mistake! I have heard that alot of native speaker dc in German school don't get top grade sin English though so I'm not too worried. As I've said before, both my dc have had marks taken off for using phrases or words that hadn't yet been covered in class!

I didn't comment on your potty/night nappies question becuase you're already doing so much better than me when I was potty training. I failed and had my 2 in nappies up to age 4 and 3 day time and it took a while to get them out of night time nappies. I know my sister used to lift her dds out of bed when she went to bed at 11pm and put them on the toilet half asleep. She did that for years.

Morning...

Canella yes baby H is a lovely age it is true - so smiley (except when he's cross...) and very communicative in his baby way - giggling, waving, holding his hands up to be lifted, clapping, and his delight with the oddest of small things is highly amusing and very sweet, and it's lovely to watch the new things he can do. I am proud of his high speed commando crawling although he is rather fascinated by getting to the hall and peering under the open stairs down to the dark basement... eek - don't remember DS1 doing that and he was a baby here too... He is a menace though, he terrorises Ds1, stealing his toy cars and getting himself onto his "race tracks" and disrupting his games, poor boy! Also - he appears not to need to sleep - last night was worse than ever, and today he napped from 7am to 8am (having been aw3ake since 4am) so DS1 was still home and needing taking to KiGa so no chance at all to lie down with him...

C4o hello, welcome back, hope your nanny stays around. I am a little jealous of the DHs who did the Nikalaus stuff - mine is German but all that is down to me, no idea if he'd do anything if I didn't...

Linzer hope the last English classes went ok and you were thanked by the teachers! I am somewhat dreading dd l(and later the boys) earning English at school, she will be an utter novelty as there are no other English speakers at her school.

Ladder I think I meant to answer your toilet training questions but got distracted by baby probably. Thing is it really is one of those areas where every child is so different - ds1 was dry at night from 2 years 9 months, and has never had a night accudent (he is 4 now) - the first day he had no nappy he was confused by me getting one out at bed time and said "I don't have nappies" so I left him nappy free, expecting accidents, but that was it - he still had the odd day accident but dry at night! Dd on the other hand was dry in the day at 2.5 but I went the reward chart route to get her dry at night a full year later, at 3.5, and she continued to have the odd accident til she turned 4. Think you just have to take the child's lead, but no hurry with nights imo! I do know 3 girls who were still in pul ups at night at 5...

oh meant to say neither of mine ever had dry night nappies while they still had nappies - and ds1 does go to the loo at 5am most days (but he was awake at that time even when he had nappies and he doesn't disturb us unless he hears anyone out of bed)

hello admystletoe, cross post

oh and I never lifted ds1 for night time toileting - tried it once with dd and she woke right up and took forever to settle again - mine are light sleepers!

5more, I think that's what put me off lifting mine - no way was I going to risk waking them up at that time of night! But my sister did it for years, almost until her dc were too big to lift up easily. Fear of wet beds and more washing probably made her do it.

Your ds sounds so cute, I also love that age. Enjoy it while it lasts, one day they tell you not to kiss them and cuddle them so you have to get loads of that in now too!

Oh dear, I've just pressed 'order now' on amazon again! The best bit is you don't have to hand the money over in person like in a shop so you can ignore that part and just not look at the bank statement! Ds wanted some headphones for his laptop and when he's playing games and talking to his friends on skype. I hope I ordered the right ones as I have no idea about that sort of thing.

Thanks for your input, 5more. I can't imagine lifting would work with my DD, either, for the same reason.

My guess is that DD would be dry most nights, but I would have to take her to the toilet very early in the morning for my own peace of mind, since she comes into our bed at around 4:45-5:45 each morning. I also think she would have the occasional accident in her own bed especially when we've been in a restaurant the evening before and she's drunk a lot of Apfelschorle.

I didn't think my questions were really age-specific, admystletoe, but I suppose they were in terms of it being a communication and independence issue as much as anything at her age.

Tag zusammen.

C4ro I hope work has calmed down a bit & that you are feeling a bit better. It sounds like everything hit you at once. Do you have much time off over Christmas? I hope things work out for your poor nanny - how awful for her!

Linzer Good luck with the English lessons. When do you start again after Christmas? I hope you have a decent break & that they surprise you with something nice today. (Masses of chocolate, a book voucher, nice wine...)

admysteltoe The order now button on Amazon is very dangerous! Amazon is the only reason I have managed any Christmas shopping this year.

5more He sounds adorable! Any chance of a pic? (Feel free to tell me to bugger off - I realise how nosey I am.) Sorry the sleep situation isn't any better. Is there any way your DH could take a few days off (a long weekend maybe) to give you chance to nap?

ladder No potty training advice from my end but I have my fingers crossed and my thumbs pressed that it works out for you.

I think things are improving here.... I hadn't bf'd for 30 hours on the really full side by this morning & even longer on the other side. Milk was spurting out in all directions in the shower, the bedsheets & my pyjamas were soaked through & it was so painful & lumpy that I had to let him feed for 2 mins or so from that side, but it doesn't feel like it's filling up again so fingers crossed. I've almost finished the second bag of frozen peas & took a second dose of the lactation suppression medication yesterday. It feels such shame to waste all this milk but I really couldn't take any more.

I've just had a lovely, hot cup of full-strength PG Tips for the first time in a year, mmmmm. (I'm sure I shall be bouncing off the walls later :) )

Glad the milk seems to be settling Gator - have just added 2 pics to my profile just for you - have never had pics on my mn profile before...

DS2 just fed to sleep on my knee and big 2 are playing Playmobile in the corner - will peace reign til ds1's football training Christmas party in an hour? I'd like a cup of tea but daren't move, as ds2 fell asleep on me earlier and I had to get up to answer the door and he woke right up - I know he should nap in the cot by now, and he used to at one point, but it is inevitably doomed atm so I am just in survival mode til his nose clears up and he can breathe more easily.

He really is adorable!! All three are gorgeous :)
Good luck with your hour of peace and quiet.....

OMG, I just went on your profile, 5more, to look at the photos (which are adorable btw) and then clicked on the Christmas card thread . Can you realy buy named Xmas cards . I have definitely been away from the UK for too long...

Aw your dc are gorgeous 5more!! H looks like a right cute but cheeky monkey.

Not much MN time today - DH is off till tues so we had a lazy morning then went for lunch with ds1. We get so little time in the day together normally that I really appreciate every minute. [soppy emotion]!!

LinzerTinsel Thanks, luckily all calmed down now. Just normal level workload and closing out the year to go now. Hope your classes are settling down- are they just at the distractable age? I'm still vaguely hunting somewhere to do weekend class with others. Not going to be easy to fit it in but if I don't start soon, I'll not get moving at all.

admysteltoe I'm definitely going for an amazon-Christmas this year! This weekend promises a mad dash for urgent things though. Nanny situation seems to be calming down. Her BF seems to have managed to talk his way out of it and she is much happier. She is going home to Hungary and then to see a mate in London over the Christmas break. It is her birthday Jan 1 so we have to think of something for a birthday and Christmas for her. We are off from 23-28 at MIL over Tyrol way.

Canella From my DH experience, there is no way to win against language teachers. After 3 years out in US as a teen, he came back bi-lingual to German schools. Had one teacher that kept marking him down if he didn't give the exact answer on her form and, in a self-righteous fury, took one test result to one of the English teachers he really liked and respected. He was basically told, well you're right and it should have been full marks but tough luck lad, suck it up! If you know your DD has the English really and scores only reflect dyslexia and harsh marking, just try and cheer her up that it doesn't reflect her skill level really.

laddinmyxmasstocking I'm doing a bit of a sort on the too-small clothes. Some of the manky stuff I just throw straight out, only keeping things worth having as I've got 2 younger brothers and a BIL that all got married in the last year and all of whom could possibly need some of it! Not sure if I could fit another baby in- the ideal gap for me would be DD off to school first but I'm 37/ she's only 16 mo so that would be pushing up to very-elderly for the second. I have got a few very nice things indeed- mostly for the aforementioned 3 weddings, plus I made a slight pricing conversion f-up in Geneva and got a lovely but as-it-turned-out hideously overpriced jumper and tights from Gallo for her! I like your idea of the cloth nappies when night training

Gator Thanks too. Luckily it is all settling already. Still tired from virus I think but we have the week off at Christmas so it will be OK. Not sure if Nanny situation is really resolved- as said, BF has persuaded her that the girl must have faked up an email address looking like it was his, made a fake mail to herself, then sent that on to nanny as "proof". Maybe it's true, maybe it is B-S and she will have the same problem again if he is really a cheater. Are you cutting out the BF now? I hope that goes well, it seemed to take ages to fully stop for me but I think only a couple of days to feel more comfortable. My brother sent me PGTips in the post and both my Mum and my Sister brought them when they visited so it's the one thing I have cupboards full of now.

5more Your DC are very smiley! Little sweeties. Do you upload pics directly or have to host them on flickr/ other places to do it?

It is the work Christmas party tonight so I'm getting my party face together and sitting here at work waiting for it to be time to drive over. Doesn't start until 1900 but no point to go home, have 5 minutes and then have to drive all the way back again. Not sure what the general protocol is of Austrian customer-staff parties is so will hopefully learn something tonight.

Canella Hope you're enjoying your child-free time with your DH - it's a very rare occurrence here too, and it's quite nice to be awake enough to actually talk to each other!

5more Great pics - your DC are all adorable. I saw that Christmas card thread too and I must admit that my DC all sent individual cards to (and received individual cards from) my parents, but not named ones. Today I got a second card that had been designed by the child (with the name of the school on the back); is this the latest card trend? Although I vaguely remember receiving one last year too...
The DDs were the only English speakers at their school until this year (when two more children growing up bilingually started), but were never treated as a novelty btw. I'm aware (but only because a couple of friends have said so) that I stand out here because I speak English to the DC, but I've never felt very conspicuous and most people don't mention it when I first meet them.

Gator Glad to hear that things are improving and that you're able to indulge in normal tea again.
Chocolate, wine or a book token would all have been wonderful, but I just got a thank you and happy Christmas. I used to get chocolate at Christmas and in the summer from DD1's class, but that stopped when her old teacher retired - although I did get chocolate and a voucher for a stationery store from both teachers/classes at the end of last year. I start teaching again in the first week of school after Christmas (so on 12th Jan) as I get next Thursday off.

admylin I felt like a huge failure at potty training too, as DD1 was in nappies until she was almost 4 - when she started KiGa, she was the only child who hadn't been potty trained. Mine were all still in pull-ups at night until they were at least 5 (DS still is), so I'm probably not the best person to offer advice either! I did lift them for a while when they first stopped wearing nappies at night; I know it's controversial, but it worked for us as they would often be wet if we forgot to do so and they never woke up properly.
I can imagine DD1 getting 3s (or worse) for English at Gymnasium as she just can't spell in English at all. I really must start doing a bit more written English with her, but she has so much to do for school anyway that I don't want to put even more pressure on her. She's also fairly quiet although her participation in class has improved this semester, according to her teacher.

ladder I found GF's potty training book very sensible too, although it didn't work with DD1 (not that anything did). I read the CLB book when DD1 was born and dismissed it, but was so desperate for sleep after three months of a max. of 5 hours' (interrupted) sleep a night that I gave it a go and, I must admit, it was a godsend. But I do recognise that it's not to everyone's tastes and I didn't follow her routines to the letter (I don't think you can with a bf baby, despite what she claims).

Must start putting the DC to bed; I'm determined to have them all in bed by 7 pm tonight as DH is out at his work Christmas do and I'd like to have as much of the evening to myself as possible! That sounds very selfish, I know... but I always have to wake the girls and usually DS too in the mornings so I think they could do with a slightly earlier bedtime (I aim for 7pm, but it's usually more like 7.30-8pm).

x posts C4ro - you don't work for the same company as DH, do you? Although from what I remember, you're in completely different fields (he works for an electricity company). Hope you enjoy the Christmas party, anyway!
Yes, the younger children can be distracted (the older ones are generally quite well-behaved) but it's hard work as they seem to need constant distraction. What kind of class are you looking for? There seems to be very little in the way of organised classes going on here at weekends, esp. for younger DC, but it's probably easier to find something if you're nearer to Vienna.