Sommer, Strand und Sonne - life in Germany and Austria

[LinzerTorte]

A thread for all those living in Germany or Austria, and for anyone else who would like to chat.

my last post has disappeared. grr. now i'm all behind again.

5more - what a shame, yes, petershausen is the wrong end - journey time of an hour, excluding either end of course, so not worth it sadly. Feel like I'm trapped in an impossible job situation. Dunno why I was reading through a relationships thread, and the dw is contemplating divorce and she's SAHM to 3, and all the people shouting get a job, you have to support yourself now etc. I'm thinking, firstly thank goodness all ok ban dh and me, but I feel v. vulnerable and frustrated and wtf would I do as being in a foreign country with children is such a huge hurdle. I've got a degree and post grad degree but feel trapped. Totally. Def did the wrong thing at school.

Anyway, yes, like Ad, my ds & dd did the whole BLW before it was 'invented'. Neither would be spoon fed, so I had no choice but to give them food and let them get on with it. Brei didn't feature heavily on the menu as a result.....

DC last day today! Can't wait. I think they're all exhausted, well def now, as ds1 had a class party last night till 10 (was v. impressed, he & 2 friends organised it and charged for entry. Amazed they decided to donate the proceeds to the Africa appeal. Think he's an aspiring Lord Sugar...) Ds2 had Hort Übernachtung, so he will be knackered. Will get them back and let them mong.

I tend to drive to UK cos for the 6 of us it is always way over 1k, even with easyjet. If we're going for over a week I'll drive it for sure. Bloody hard work though.

tadj, sorry to hear about your night. Brings back lots of bad memories. Thank goodness I can now be reasonably assured of an undisturbed night these days though still totally knackered cos we keep going to bed way too late. watching UK tv and the 1 hr time difference is partly to blame, and dh just won't go to bed any earlier. If I go to bed before him I can't sleep (wondering wtf he's going to come up) so I can't sleep anyway. Am dead myself this am as a result of dh, not kids, grrr

oh ernest, you sound so down :(. I am sorry to hear that you are feeling so trapped. What did you study at uni? In one's 20s it is so hard to know where life will take one and how one best prepares for it. I've not been around this thread for long but in the short time that I have been around you have had a tough time with moving and with the DC - I take my hat off to you, you have four, I struggle with 3 who are younger. (BTW your ds1 sounds brilliant with his charity raising!) Do you have any support near you to give you a break? I hope the holidays give you some time to reflect and think about what you want to do, both professionally and personally. Would talking to a professional help with your relationship with dh and with ideas of what to do job wise? Anyway, I am rambling but just wanted to send you some words. Look after yourself.

aw thanks for your kind words. I'm not miserable or anything, well, fed up with the conundrum and fed up with being at home! I am FED UP!! There, said it. But not down. does that make sense?

I guess I want or need the impossible. You're right though re planning in your 20's. I never really had a burning wish to be x, y or z, or a clear goal. Unfortunately I guess being at home so long has dented my confidence or ambition. I don't feel I would win any entrepreneurial prizes! Yes, unlike ds1.

Anyway, the kids have all broken up, come home with their Zeugnis. All basically what we knew, so no surprises. Though ds3 got on his really really positive comments from all his teachers in all the different areas, apart from RE who was really negative. I won't say anything unless ds has him next year. Tbh, while I understand not every teacher can get on with every kid, and I'm sure ds3 has it in him to be a complete pain, the shocking difference in the comments from everyone else is well, shocking, but most of all, the fact that he has written such a damning couple of sentences about a 7 yr old (little) boy, and not managed to say ! positive thing really makes me disregard anything he says. It leaves me feeling no confidence in his abilities as a teacher, his commitment to helping my ds learn. No credibility in my eyes. Is it just me? (I used to be a teacher and I would never, ever have written such a negative piece about anyone, and I had to teach some really difficult, troubled teens, not a flaming 7 yr old kid who's knee high to a grasshopper) Rant over!

Anyway, I'm really happy they're all finished and can rest and relax. They need it. (though dd will go to Krippe all next week, so I can do stuff with the boys, and tidy and pack).

Anyone got any plans this weekend? Anyone been to see HP?

That's awful about your DS's report Ernest - how can anyone be so negative about a 7 year old? It doesn't sound like the teacher can be any good if he can't find anything positive to say so you're right to ignore the comments if you can. I wish we got comments on the DC's Zeugnisse but it's just grades (would prefer comments to grades); DH says it's the same at Gymnasium etc., you only ever get grades on your report.

DH has just brought me a glass of wine um den Urlaub einzuläuten - we're off to Zell am See tomorrow morning to meet up with some friends from England who are coming over for their wedding anniversary. I seem to have spent most of the day packing; I'm trying to pack for our trip back to the UK as well, as we're back from Zell am See on Wed and then flying to Britain on Thurs.

DS's appointment went OK; he really didn't enjoy having the skin prick test but the paed confirmed that he's allergic to dust mites and cats (more to dust than cats, though, as we'd suspected - the ENT specialist said it was the other way round). Got home to find the chemist (next door to the doctor) had given us the wrong medicine for DS, which is a bit of a pain as it would be an hour's round trip to change it, although they said they might be able to post it to us.

Sorry the job is in the wrong place Ernst! They emailed me today again to ask when I'm coming back and have asked if I know anyone who is interested, but there are not many native speakers out this way, and tbh I don't know any native speakers with a teaching background personally, except one and she has set herself up in business doing English singing and playing sessions in Kindergartens and Horts - is that something you can see yourself doing? Would be the self employed route again though! If it makes any difference the school is literally 5 mins walk from the station in Petershausen! :) I worked 8-2 once a week (it's longer days than regular Grundschule as it's private, but it is not snooty private, it's all a bit hippy and child led :) I liked it but the adults involved are a bit intense and earnest (no pun intended).

I know how you feel - we have a lot in common background wise in fact - I did an English degree and didn't use it for years, except for a one year in Japan teaching thing, came back and worked in an investment bank just so I could live in London and have fun with my friends who were there already (started as a PA, didn't need a degree at all and bluffed the non existent secretarial skills that would have been more useful). Did a masters in business the evenings after a bit just because my boss offered to get the bank to pay, but then took voluntary redundancy before I could use it... Re-trained to teach (did secondary too, like you) but hated it in the UK... the politics and staff more than the kids... Guess it has come in useful here as a "little" job, but as my German isn't fluent at all I can't teach in a state school, only private schools and evening classes etc. Don't know that I could support myself here without DH, I couldn't navigate the tax and legal system anyway... It does make you vulnerable!

That is shocking about the RE teacher - you hear things like that here, in the UK it would be incredibly bad practice not to say anything positive about a child, and for even the most difficult to like, truent, antisocial, abusive teen the report still usually has to have more positive than negative, even if the teacher has to reach to find positives! That anyone could be purely negative about an otherwise well liked 7 year old is a little bit scary for someone like me whose children are only just about to enter the school system!

DD was "thrown out" of KiGa today (literally - do they do that at all KiGa's or only hers? The symbolic swinging the kids out the door to their parents? Quite cool anyway, the kids love it!). But I have written quite enough and the kids are not in bed yet and baby has woken and is starting to grumble so best shut the laptop again!

Have a fun weekend away Linzer, hope the packing and mix up with the meds are not too much hassle!

Thanks 5more, the packing is almost done now so I'm feeling slightly less stressed. How can it take almost all day to pack for five days away, though?

Btw the children get thrown out of our KiGa too - out of the window in ours!

That's so cute about the dcs being thrown out of KiGa!

Hope you have a lovely holiday Linzer. Zell am See sounds gorgeous.

I also know how you feel Ernst. I too feel trapped as my work permit ran out in March and the stupid lawyer didn't apply for it to be renewed on time. So I shouldn't really do my 48 hours a year job, never mind something useful that could contribute to our dcs college savings, or our retirement. To top that off, German, which is the only language I could teach here as you need a Masters degree in your subject and mine's in German, has been dropped from the High Schools and the credit classes at the Community college. There was an advert for a private school on TV the other day showing a German class and I almost burst into tears as that teacher already has pretty much the only job going here!

Anyway, ds2 is now rolling back to front but does not like the babyrice. Will start on grated cheese or carrot sticks soon then!

Hope you all have wonderful weekends. It will be hot here (over 30) so will take the kids to the local pool with slides etc and maybe head up to a lake and barbecue there!

Hope everyone had a good weekend.

Ernest, hope the holidays have started well and the weather is better than up north! Will your dd be in full time Kindergarten after summer? Are you drivng to UK soon? I feel such a wimp when I'm not even able to drive over to Berlin because I'm scared on the autobahn. Honestly, the driving instructor should never have let me pass the test. When he said congratulations, you've passed I actually said 'really?'!

Jenny, you asked about Berlin. Yes, half of me would like to go back as I think the dc would have so many choices later on but the other half of me is scared of all the work I would have finding a Gymnasium and a flat in an area that suits us, guilt feelings about the dc having to find new friends, the enormous cost of moving house AGAIN, etc! I wouldn't really miss Hannover to be honest though.

Anyway, dh is speaking to the boss here. When he told the group leader last week that he had an offer else where, she cried in front of him and put her head on her desk, only trouble is she can't give hom the contract, the big bos shas to do that. He gave 9 months but dh wants atleast 4 years minimum.

We shall see tonight what has happened today. The boss in Berlin was on the phone last night telling dh to come and start in September!

admylin - does your dh have a preference? I´m not surprised you can´t face moving again, it would be really good if he could get a longer contract, so you could get rid of the uncertainty.

I´ve been out with a few friends for breakfast this morning which was really nice. A couple of the women have also got children starting school next week and were talking about how they have bought them new outfits that colour co-ordinate with their school ranzens. Please tell me this isn´t normal (not the new outfits, but matching them to the Ranzen). I would never in a million years think of doing such a thing and ds will be wearing a shirt and trousers that he´s had a while, but not worn often and they certainly don´t match his ranzen.

Well the sun is finally out, so we´ll be off to the Freibad this afternoon.
Hope everyone else is making the most of the good weather.

Hupa, no not normal to get colour coordinated outfits and bags! Which Ranzen did you get? HAve you got all your Schultüte stuff ready? I have a list of things to get for my 2 so will be starting soon. Paint and brushes that got used up last year, a few note books and new felt pens.

Dh would like to go back to the Berlin group for the atmosphere, they were all very sociable, here they are very closed and unsociable. But the subject here is more his thing so he's spoken to the big boss and he wants to keep him so is looking at giving him a longer than 9 month contract and after that permenant.

Just heard from Jugendamt, they said that dd's class teacher was wrong not to take her dyslexia into account, he should by law accept the fact and offer extra help and not wait until a therapy starts. So the man said I have to make an appointment with the Schulleiter and sort it out. Not looking forward to it, I need an assertiveness pill - if only!

Afternoon all!

Ernest Sorry to hear you're feeling so fed up. When are you off to the UK? It's shocking to hear about your DS's report - is it something you could discuss with the teacher or is that sort of thing not open for discussion? I hope the weather is nice and sunny where you are so you and your DCs can enjoy the holidays. (Btw I saw HP and thought it was fab :) )

Hupa Matching outfits to Schulranzen? That is crazy. Although I used to work with a girl who would match the carrier bag she brought her lunch in to her outfit and if she couldn't find a plastic bag in the right colour her day was ruined. I'm all for a bit of colour co-ordination but that's mad. Enjoy the Freibad!

Admylin I hope things are sorted with DH's job soon - how are you coping with the uncertainty? It sounds like a difficult decision, moving somewhere like Berlin or staying in a job where the subject is more your thing. Let us know how things turn out! Good luck with the Schulleiter too!

So.... we're having a boy! To be honest I didn't have a strong preference before we found out but am now over the moon that it's a boy!
We visited the in-laws at the weekend and told them and they seemed really pleased too - esp as DH's brother has a daughter so the PILs will now have a granddaughter and a grandson. DH's niece was her usual charming self. She's only 5 and usually fairly good and a nice girl, but she worships the ground DH walks on (he is now known as der große Held) and I think she might have cottoned on to the fact that she will have to share his attention once the baby is here and has been quite funny with me since we announced the pregnancy. Maybe I'm reading too much into it, who knows, but the catty comments etc are a starting to grate. Like I said, she's only 5, I'm sure it's nothing to worry about.

I make sure all 6 of us have colour coodinated undies on veryday, doesn't everyone do that? As for outfit/ Ranzen match, i thought it was standard?

(That's a sleep deprived attempt at sarcasm in case of any doubt btw)

Later, congratulations! Whens your due date? Don't tell dn or anyone else your name mind before its born. What sort of omments she making? Intrigued.

Ad, good look on job front. Seems like you've had so much uncertainty. Would you seriously move again?

Not too bothered about ds report as such, cos overall, he had a very god report. Dunno if anyone remembers, but at end of Kiga, out of blue they recommended he went to special school, which was a total shock. We ignored their advice and went for rlocal school. And it was a disaster! He reacted to the change really badly, sitting under tables, making weird noises, teacher hauling us in after 3 days.... So, not the best start! But he setteled down, was dx with ADHD, like is brother(s) and he just improved day by day. By Christmas was fine really ( i go in every Wednesday, so see him in action) and his work was streets ahead of many of the others and his behaviour absolutely fine. So after crap start he got great report. Except for this 1 teavher. Will have words next year.

Cant beleve some of you about to o back when we only just started! Or flat should be finished this weekend.

Ad, please find enclosed a bunch of assertiveness pills ( 000000 ) for you to jump up and down to when you have your meeting re dd dyslexia. I missed that. Tell me again the latest.

Have a nice day everyone.

Thanks for the pills ernest! Need them. I messaged you by the way.

Yes we would seriously have to move if dh doesn't get the deal he's asking for here. I wouldn't go straight away as school starts in a couple of weeks so we'd be following later when the dc have done half a year atleast. Looks as if we're staying here for now though. Phew, moving costs a fortune every time too.

Congratulations later! Is your niece going to be around alot when baby is born? Or does she live some distance away? at least you are prepared, she is going to be very jealous by the sound of it.

Going to a Rentenversicherung Berater today, I have some forms to fill in AGAIN and I just give up - some of the questions are just too deep! I'd rather get a professional to help me fill them in than sit for hours doing it myself.

Admylin Would the Berlin employers pay anything towards the removal costs? A sort of relocation package?
When is your meeting with the Schulleiter?
Good luck with the Rentenversicherungberater - German paperwork is crazy, I think it makes perfect sense to get an expert to help, it will certainly preserve your sanity!

I'm due in 8 weeks (eek!). We sort of told parents, PILs etc names before we knew what we were having, so they have an idea already. I keep throwing new names into the mix though as I seem to be getting strangely possessive over the baby before he is even born. Blame it on the hormones!

Ernest The comments are probably nothing but jealousy, but I think she is already a bit funny with me sometimes as she idolises DH (saying that she's happy to come to me when she wants attention or needs someone to play with etc, so she may not be that funny with me at all). It's little things like pointing pointy things at my stomach (the horns on a viking helmet, a stick she's found in the park) and saying 'ich werde dein Baby kaputt machen' and the like. Or she's been telling everyone she's really excited that it's a boy, even calling him her brother instead of her cousin, yet to me she says she wants a girl, and if I can't change the baby for a girl at Aldi (?!) then both me and the baby have to starve in jail as punishment. Very, very strange, but then I have no experience with 5 year olds so not really sure what to think. I'm putting it down to jealousy and a desire to wind me up a little and trying not to get too het up about it.

On a far more positive note - it's my birthday tomorrow!

Wow, she sounds very strange for a 5 year old later. Did anyone see her pointing the stick at your tummy? Really abit wierd, you're going to have to keep an eye on her every move when the baby is born.

Dh did tell them in Berlin that he would need relocation help but not sure what they said. Anyway, it won't be happening soon. Moving with plenty oftime to organise stuff isn't half as bad as having to move quickly with no planning (have done both kinds of move and the no plan one was hell).

No headmaster meeting arranged yet, I'm still trying to figure out how to actually get an appointment!! For now, school is still closed but I know on 2 days a week the secretaries are there and so is the headmaster. Only I don't want to phone the secretary as I hate the question 'um was geht es' - none of her business really, thinking an email would be a possibility but still have to word it. The Jugendamt man said a letter would be good too as I could then show him their answer but then again I need someone to help me correct a letter and wording it in the first place is going to take a couple of days.

admylin - I think a letter sounds a good idea and avoids having to be assertive on the phone, which is always good in my book. I´d send it registered post, so there can be no denials in the future about receiving it.

Later - your niece`s behaviour is really odd and unnerving. Hopefully once the baby is here she´ll settle down and enjoy her cousin.
Now that you know what your expecting, you can go mad and buy all the cute outfits that you see (even though in reality you don´t need many and get given loads as presents).

ernest - you must be really pleased the flat is nearly finished, it seems to have happened really quickly. When are you planning to go over and have a look?

Thanks to everyone for reassuring me about the outfits and colour co-ordinated Ranzens.
I think I´ve bought everything that ds needs, but it´s spread around the house, so i need to get it all together and check I haven`t got 4 hole punches and no pencils.

no time, but agree, letter good, but on phone when they ask what for, just say it's about dd in class. Punkt. if they push it, then just say to do with dyslexia and then that's more than enough.

quick Q, after trip to brighton was totally delighted with the builders and their work, v. v. happy with friendliness, communication, work etc. Couple weeks ago, main man goes on holiday. I hear basically nothing. Send 1 email half way, just apologies, fair enough. Now he's been back since weekend, no phone call, couple of v. brief emails, not friendly, much too little info & communication. Have tried to call, He says he's "out of service currently" (is he a robot?). Price, etc been fantastic. Now yesterday I asked him to fit 4 light fittings which cost a tenner each. in email - charge for 120 quid! queried it - says had to reinforce ceiling, took a full day. I am at this, he should have checked with me 1st.

Have gone from composing delighted rave review to feeling seriously pissed off. Still I might get there on Sunday and be delighted, and he's just been too busy. Should I call or just leave it? Tbh. it's making me anxious. Also, I wonder why the huge change in attitude? Do I challenge this or enquire or what?

Sorry to hit and run..

Later, how often do you see dn? Agree, weird for her to be so jealous, esp as not a sibling. Maybe you could almost do a couple of typical sibling welcoming baby things to make her feel more comfortable? Have word with her parents?

Morning all!! been a busy few days but got 10 mins (in between packing for hols) so thought i'd quickly type a post!

Ernest - not sure what to do about your builders. Its a tricky situation being so far away and therefore not much control about whats going on. Obviously you want the renovations done properly but he should really be contacting you about big jobs like reinforcing the ceiling. I'd be saying that to him when you see him next week.

Hupa - definitely no colour coordinated clothes/Ranyens here!! altho i did here about a child here who started the first class 2 years ago and turned up on the first day in a white suit with white tie etc!!! think he'll be mortified about those school photos in years to come. I plan to send ds in some nice jeans (ie no holes in the knees) and a t shirt. But i've still got 6 weeks yet to think of his outfit. How does your ds feel about starting school?

admylin - hope you can get the appt sorted out with school - i think ernests plan seems like a good one. Also agree that relocation costs should be part of the deal. Its an expensive business moving. Hope it gets sorted one way or the other - the uncertainty must be horrible.

later - Happy Birthday!!!! hope you are having a fab day! how nice you found out the sex of the baby. But how weird about your dn - some serious jealousy there. My dd was 5 when ds2 was born and she didnt act like that - think at 5 they are able to understand that they can share the love. But if she's never had to experience that then she might need lots of explaining to.

SO life carries on being chaotic - had a fantastic time in Munich with my friend from Scotland and Take That were great - well actually Robbie Williams was beyond amazing but after he had been on I felt they struggled to keep up the frenzy he had created. But it was still good! And we had a lovely day with my BIL and SIL in Munich on the saturday. Came back here on saturday night and then spent all Sunday at a fest in the local town - by monday I was exhausted! felt like i'd spent the whole weekend on my feet.

But my friend went back yesterday but not before she kindly watched the dc while i went to the cardiologist. He was lovely and spoke to me in perfect English. As i already knew, my heart problem isnt life threatening but does increase my risk of stroke so I've to start taking an aspirin daily. He also put me thro a load of tests yesterday including a 24 hour ECG which i've still got on. But think at the end of it they'll be happy to do nothing and just give me some tablets to keep at home in case it happens again. Was overly impressed by their efficiency but not sure if thats because i knew the other chefarzt? Would be impressed if thats the care that everyone receives. Puts the NHS to shame.

My kitchen is carrying on - the door and window are being replaced as I type and the tiler is coming tomorrow. All this while I have to pack to go on holiday on saturday!! chaos!!!!!!! Looking forward to going on holiday to somewhere with a proper kitchen - might not be so bothered about cooking this year (i normally force us to eat out or eat pizzas most nights since i say its no holiday for me otherwise!!). But the weather forecast for Austria for next week is rain rain rain! might be playing a lot of monopoly!

Ranzens Hupa!! the keyboard is a german one but its set to english!! beyond confusing with Z/Y!

I have that problem too Canella when I switch back and forth between keyboards, although I keep mine on German most of the time so that I can use umlauts and ß.

Just taking a quick break from the unpacking, packing and washing to catch up with the thread. We had a lovely few days in Zell am See and were really lucky with the weather, which was awful last week and has gone back to rainy again today. We still needed warm clothes to go up the mountain, though; the company that DH works for has a reservoir at the top of one of the mountains, which we inevitably had to go and visit (quite interesting though, and spectactular scenery).

I thought of you while we were away Jenny as the family we met up with live in York and had also invited some other friends who live in Tadcaster. I almost told them that I "know" someone who used to live there, but restrained myself!

Canella Glad you had a good time in Munich and that the appointment with the cardiologist went well; it must have put your mind at rest. The healthcare system is so much more efficient in this part of the world, isn't it?

Ernest What a pain about the builders' change of attitude; they really should have contacted you if the costs were going to be so much more than they'd originally told you. Agree with Canella that you should discuss it with him when you seem him next week.

hupa Def. no colour coordinated outfits and school bags here either! I still need to get all the school stuff, but will leave it until we're back from the UK - I've sorted through what we already have to see what we can reuse next year, though (and have put it into neat piles that are bound not to stay neat for long).

admylin Yes, a letter or e-mail sounds preferable to having to phone the secretary. Hope your DH gets the deal he's asked for (unless of course you decide that you want to move back to Berlin after all).

Later Exciting news about finding out the sex! We didn't tell anyone the names we'd chosen until after the DC were born, although my brother did say that when they told people DD1's names, everyone said what a lovely name her second name was but no one mentioned her first name! (Not sure if this was a subtle way of telling me that he didn't like it either.) Agree with the others that your niece's behaviour is a little strange; hopefully she'll be a bit more positive about it all once the baby is actually here.

Right, must get back to the packing. We're leaving at around 6 pm so that we can go to M&S beforehand (which may sound a little strange as we're flying back to the UK, but it means we can stock up without having to worry about adding to the weight of our luggage on the flight back - and there's no M&S near where my parents live, anyway). Our flight is at 10.30 pm so we won't be back at my parents' until around 3 am - eek!

Hope you're having a long lie in Linzer and you have a lovely time back home.

Canella, the treatment sounds great and yes I do think knowing one of the chef ärzte helps to get better treatment but that's just how things work here. Dh has helped quite a few patients because he can have a word with the chefarzt here. Have a great time in Austria. How long are you away for?

Will your dd's and ds's first day back at school be on the same day? The Gymnasium einschulung is just as emotional as the 1st year one. I had to be very brave and hold back the tears when my 2 walked out of the hall with their new class!

Back to stage 1 with my rentenversicherung papers. The person I was meant to see doesn't help anymore and the alternative person is away. There's also the option of just sending the forms in with a question mark next to the questions I didn't understand.

For the headmaster, do you think something along the line: I would like an appointment to discuss my dd as the form teacher, Elternsprecher and other parents have not been able to help me. Have to try a few versions in German.

I'm no help with the paperwork!! Sorry! About the headmaster - think you need to word it carefully so it doesnt set you off on the wrong foot. So maybe "we've been struggling to find the appropriate help for dd and I would like to arrange a meeting with you to discuss and formulate a plan for the next school year." is that what you want to discuss with him? Sorry if i've not got the right story.

Yeah dd and ds1 both have their first days on the same day. Dd is insistent at the moment that she'll go to the gymnasium on her own but i want to go with her. They dont start at the same time so it'll be no trouble to do both! But its still 5 weeks away! Lot to do before then.

So the new window and door is in but the finish around it is so crap. The workers were proper locals who I could barely understand so I got dh to phone this morning to complain. It just looks like a shoddy job at the moment. But the quality of the door and window are good so hope it'll be quickly sorted. The tiler is here today and has got 2/3 of the floor tiled already. And it looks great! Cant wait now for it all to be done. Only away a week but that'll be enough to let us relax before coming back to finish our renovations!

Hope you're all enjoying your hols - have a fab time linzer in the UK! "see" you all in a week

Canella, sounds as if the kitchen is getting there really fast! Hope they come back to finish the door/window job off properly.

Definately try to make it to the first school day, your dd can't go alone, it would be sad as there's usually a little ceremony and most dc turn up with both parents and grandparents (or here they seemed to). I bet you'll be running about on that day as the year 1 dc only stay for a very short time usually too.

Thanks for the headmaster tip - I have to try and explain in the email/letter that I have already tried to get help or advice with the form teacher and elternsprecher as I know you're meant to go that route first. You're right though - I have to be careful even though I'd really like to say the form teacher was useless!!

admylin - I agree with being careful about the wording, but would definitely mention that the Jugendamt have recommended you contact the head as your attempts at making progress through the class teacher etc. have not been successful.

Canella - Which colour tiles did you decide on in the end?
I´d definitely try to go to both Einschulungen - do you know the times yet? Here the Gesamtschule start at 8:30 and then the Grundschule at 10:30, although we have the Gottesdienst on the Monday evening.

ernest - probably a bit late, but you´ve definitely got to say something and stress that you want to be consulted first if there are going to be anymore unexpected costs.

Later - sorry I missed it was you birthday - hope you had a great time yesterday.

Linzer hope you have a great holiday.

Ds managed to trip over at the Spielplatz yesterday and split open his top and bottom lip and dh had to stich his face just above his lip. At the moment he looks like he´s boxed a few rounds with Mike Tyson, but I´m sure by Tuesday (Einschulung)a lot of the swelling will have gone down.