Sydney - very mixed reaction from family

[SeymoreButts]

DH has been offered a job in his company's Sydney office, it will be a substantial promotion for him if he takes it up. We have 2 DCs (DD 5 and DS 2) and I'm not working at the moment. I am applying to medical schools in London, if we move to Sydney that will have to wait until we have permanent residency.

My mum is understandably upset and really doesn't want us to go. She thinks I will be lonely and cut off from support of family and that my career will suffer from having to wait to start training. DH's brother is furious that we are even considering it, he has called us selfish and naive! My sister has tried to be positive and says she is looking forward to visiting. But her DD is very close to my DCs, they are like siblings really. DH's Dad thinks its a great opportunity career wise, but doesn't want us to tell DH's Mum until it is all finalised because she will be devastated.

The DCs are very close to their grandparents and I think we will all be upset, but it seems like a great opportunity for us as a family. On one hand I think it could be a lovely place for the DCs to grow up, and the promotion for DH means more security for us, but I am worried about the effect it will have on the rest of our family.

Anytime!

I would agree that the package is key (but you already know that).

When you get the details, do not translate- he'll be earning in AUD and you'll be living in AUD so put GBP out of your mind completely (unless of course you'll be paying GBP based liabilities such as a mortgage in which case it is relevant).

Then do a spreadsheet of all your costs and taxes (important- I think you normally end up paying +50% of income in tax and super in Australia) and work out where you'd be better off.

Just found mine and my main captions were

• housing (rent/ utilities/council tax equiv)
• schools
• transport (buying car, taxing it, petrol etc) or cost of public transport
• taxes
• Flying home twice a year (we were only in the ME though so easier)
• food
• Clothes

-re-location costs not covered by employer (e.g. renting current property- will you break even on that?)

When I've moved countries I've found the Explorer Series "resident Guide to X" really useful as a starting point for things to think about, although rent costs can be somewhat out of date due to publication lead times. It's probably better to get a recommendation for a REA and give them a call to discuss, or look at one of the "all agent" property websites.

Good luck!

Sorry- re taxes, that should have been "you can end up paying +50%......"- depends on income obviously, but my understanding is that the personal tax burden tends to be heavier, so make sure you factor it in.

Thanks for the advice TheBride when the time comes I will put a spreadsheet together using those outgoings... and possibly deduct 50% income tax! Something else to add to my list of things to investigate. Will have a look at the Explorer series too

Do your friends in Bondi have kids? It's the last place in Sydney I would want to live with kids tbh, very much geared up to single people having fun. If you are happy with living in an apartment the nearby suburbs of Bronte and Coogee are gorgeous, though expensive. COO level should give you the kind of money you need to have a good time here.

I think a couple of Aussie MNers live/lived in Coogee but can't remember exactly who. If you post with something like "help wth Sydney Eastern Suburbs" you might entice them out of hiding There are certainly quite a few Sydneysiders on here with little kids who might be able to give you some good advice on suburbs - mine range from 8-17 so my wishlist was lots of space and a pool which you don't get in the inner suburbs without a good few million to spare!

I agree with SD, I would not want to live in Bondi with little children, I'm in Coogee, and close by are Randwick, Bronte and Clovelly, all good for families with great Public (state schools) and private schools. It is expensive though, my friends with houses pay $950-1500 p/w and most of us are in flats, which are $600-700 p/w for a decent one. All have good bus links to the city with express buses to central (nr Haymarket).
A slightly cheaper family friendly alternative is inner west, which I would consider if making the move now.
If you've come this far in mentally planning I would encourage you to go for it, if you decide to go home after a couple of years you know you've tried it and it's a short time in the grand scheme of things.
family is a tricky one, but if one of their concerns is support network it's easy to meet people if you have little children so I doubt you would be lonely.

This is such a strange thread. Usually everyone is saying how great it is here and that you should 'live the dream'.

Well, it doesn't always turn out to be a good dream judging by the thousands of Brits who return home from the Promised Land. I've never been to Australia, I contributed to this thread because the OP posted about how distressed her and DH's families were about their plans.

What's a COO?

NoelEdmund- that's true and a review of the overseas boards show that it doesn't always work out. I actually think most of the threads are useful for that reason. Nowhere is perfect, but some countries may suit some people more than the UK, depending on personal circumstances and opportunities. The key thing to assess before you pack is whether the benefits of X place are things you can take advantage of, and whether the downsides are things you can live with.

My personal view is that, at least for those in the private sector, the areas of business growth in the next 10-20yrs are not likely to be the UK, so if you want to get ahead, you need to be flexible and get yourself overseas into the growth markets, at least for part of your career. Increasingly, adverts for senior roles are specifying international experience as an advantage. I think people from the UK are going to have to get used to the idea that, for the next generation, we're likely to be the migrants. The rest of the world's been doing it long enough.

COO is Chief Operating Officer- the director in charge of operations- usually only junior to the CEO and on a par with the CFO.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do, TheBride. I think I've been mentally scarred by that BBC prog where they send people who are thinking of moving to OZ on a taster trip - and then force them to watch videos of the family back home sobbing or being putting on a brave face. DD is only in Yr 1 but I've already decided that if she emigrates we'll go with her - whether she likes it or not!

wishlist was lots of space and a pool which you don't get in the inner suburbs without a good few million to spare! Ack! No millions here. I will have a look at Coogee too I'm not keen on Bondi if I'm honest, just from the quick look I have had at the Real Estate website. My friend there had her first child 6 months ago, and from the sounds of it lives in a very small apartment. The other friend is single! Hopefully they won't be offended if we opt for a different area. Willow5 I will have a look at inner west, I think DH and I would both consider a longer commute as a good trade off for a bit more space. What's the best way to meet other mums? Playgroups? Hopefully some of the school mums will take pity on me.

TheBride I think you are right. DH has been getting advice from a senior colleague who has just returned to the UK after a 3 year stint in the Emirates and then 2 years in New York. DH is of the opinion that his colleague's flexibility made his career.

NoelEdmondshair I'm sorry, you asked a perfectly reasonable question and my response was uncalled for. I think I am more stressed about this than I realised.

Noel I havent seen that, but have heard about it.

I guess I am quite lucky in that my parents are quite active, so they come out here for a long holiday every year, plus I go back in the summer with my son as it's so hot, so I probably see them more than i would if i lived in the UK

Sorry - I'm getting TheBride and Seymore mixed up - my last post was meant to be addressed to Seymore (although, of course, I wish Bride good luck too ).

No need to apologise, Seymore; we are moving literally round the corner and I'm getting stressed by that! Take care.

Hi Seymour,

We are moving in August so not too long away now. We are just back from a visit and I am trying to keep all the good memories of Sydney in my head when I start to get panicked. It must be very strange to contemplate a move to a city that you do not know at all.

We have 3 kids so I am having a bit of a head over heart decision- would love to live in the Inner West (Balmain to be specific) but we need a big house and a big garden which are very hard to come by. I think we will end up somewhere on the Lower North Shore- my Dh will be working in North Sydney and all his family live that direction- so it makes sense.

I think your DH is right re career progression and mobility- a lot of our friends are a C suite level and they have all done a few stints overseas - not sure where that would leave your medical studies however ??

Hope it all gets sorted out and confirmed either way, the limbo stage is difficult.