Moving dilemma - Sydney, via UAE? Sorry - rambling.

[beatenbyayellowteacup]

I'm from Sydney originally and have been living in London for nearly 9 years. It's time to move on - that much I know because I can't see any future here for me and so am losing interest in starting new projects or discovering new things. I'm homesick and have been for about 4 years now. I desperately miss Sydney but that might be because I haven't been home for 3 years. I also miss having my family around as I am single and have no family here.

But what I'm really missing is the beach, the massive blue skies and the birds, the soft water, the good food, coffee culture, some outdoor space and not being a foreigner. But I'm scared that if I go back I'll get itchy feet - again- and want to bugger off somewhere.

I also know that it's more expensive than it was so I'm thinking about doing a year in the UAE to save some money. But then I think I should just get back and get a mortgage (I'm 40) asap, and that a year in the UAE is just delaying what I really want which is to live in Sydney. And if I'm going to get promoted in Sydney to earn a decent salary (I expect I'll have to start without responsibility) then I should just get on with it.

I'm a teacher so I can move to an international school easily enough.

The other problem is that I've only started a new job in September and I really need to see it out for another year and a half. Or do I? Can I quit at Christmas and start the new year academic year in Sydney in 2012? I keep looking up property in Sydney and drooling over ugly little 1 bed apartments. If I'm going to go, I want to go asap. But I don't think I can quit my job without being irresponsible and letting down my school.

What would you do? Am I imagining Sydney to be better than it is? I'm going back this July/Aug to check it out a bit. Is it really parochial and dead or is it bustling and fun?

any advice most welcome.

I am doing the opposite to you!! I am a Brit (44) and after years of globe trotting and past 6 in Oz are returning to UK with my family.
So exactly like you have been terribly home sick for past 3 years, we are fortunate enough to be able to move as other half works abroad anyway & commutes and kids are very happy to return.
Have you been back lately? Sydney is fab and vibrant, I can see why u would miss it, we live RURAL NSW, mistake in hindsight but you live and learn.
Prices have indeed risen in Sydney but you may need to live a little further out than expected.
I guess family play a bit part too, you only have one and i think at our age we start to think about them, and our parents etc.
At least here you can get a mortgage with 10% down payment, Christ knows what we are heading for in Uk.
I think in your heart of hearts EVEN if its a mistake(it may be for both of us) you will have to do it or it will eat away at you and u should never live with regrets.
Your work situation though is another issue, i understand u need to go asap BUT you need to give work their due notice as excellent refs and good reputation are essential.
And as much as oz has lots to offer(it does) their is an invisible pull from your homeland that you just cant fight, so go with it, what have you to lose??
I hope my little insight helps, let me know how you go on.x

coansha - which bit of rural NSW are you in? We're technically rural as well, but it's not my idea of rural, only Sydneysiders'. We're right on the F3 as well which helps.
I still have my house in the UK - rented out - because of the property situation there. I'd hate to start from scratch if I decided that I really couldn't bear living here any more and needed to go back.

Beaten - I know you have to give a term's notice anyway to leave a school in the UK (assuming it's a normal UK school, not an international one).

Thing is - you're already homesick and have been for some time so what are you going to achieve by staying in the UK for another nearly 2 years? Apart from making yourself more unhappy? Might be an idea to take a trip back home for the school summer holidays - then go back to the UK for the new school term and decide (pretty immediately) whether UK or Sydney is the place for you. If you're still undecided, then stay in the UK a bit longer - but if you find leaving Sydney to be an almight wrench and the thought of another UK winter too much to bear, you'll have your answer, won't you?

A year in the UAE - well, that's not going to assuage your homesickness any. But you could put it on hold if you do get itchy feet once you get back to Sydney.

Hope you can work something out.

I've just moved back after 5 years in London.
Sydney is still fab, but I was surprised at how long it took me to really feel at home here again.
I think you should stay in your job until the end of the academic year so as not to burn bridges (dropping out mid-year won't look good on your resume) then come straight back to Sydney, get a job then get a mortgage and if you get itchy feet in a year or so then rent out your flat (no problem) and head off for another year or so.

When you get here you can do relief teaching or private tuition or something until the beginning of the next academic year. There's always a few maternity leave places to cover so find a good agency and I'm sure you'd be fine.

I have just made the move (from UK to Sydney) and am deeply regretting it......I'm a Brit married to an Aussie and should know better as we've made the move a couple of times now - mad I know! I always forget how different the UK and Australia are. Also what I hadn't factored in was how hard it would be to see my kids growing up as Aussies - `I'd had no idea how deeply ingrained my "Britishness" is. I know that I need to stop comparing, immerse myself in local culture etc etc but I can't stop beating myself up that I actually thought coming here was a good idea. I have this horrible feeling that the rest of my life will be spent in regret at this decision. Anyone out there who has managed to cope with these type of feelings and come out the other side (without going back to the UK!)?

Just realised my previous post was all about me and not about Beaten and so am now beating myself up about that!! My impression of Sydney is that if you've grown up here, it must be a difficult place to leave - it is truly beautiful and must be one of the very few cities in the world where you can have such a mixture of beautiful outside spaces and a groovy city. People are very friendly and seem genuinely happy - very odd to see for a grumpy Londoner! So if your heart is calling you then I think you should follow BUT if you've been in London for 9 years get ready for the woeful quality of the media, parochial nature of public debate - have you been following the carbon tax discussions? - tyranny of distance etc etc. Also be ready for the cost of living - Sydney is a very expensive city and salaries don't match that cost of living. You're a teacher however which is wonderfully transferable so seems to me you need to give it a go - just leave those rose tinted spectacles in London......

Beaten, we have just lef the UAE and the cost of living is very, very high there, so doubt if you would be able to save anything in year. As the others have said, go to Sydney first then if in a couple of years you still have itchy feet then go for it.

Barmcake, good point. I have an English friend who lives normally in Aus but moved to dubai for a few years to save some money and she has had quite a good time there, but hasn't saved a penny.

I was going to say, despite not paying any tax, it is easy to get through money in Dubai. I wouldn't bank on saving enough to compensate you for your year's delay in getting back to Sydney.

Also, having lived there, I'd say it's kind of a difficult place to live as a single woman in your thirties/forties. The social life tends to be either very family focused or, at the other end, going on the lash at Double Deckers and pulling randoms.

thumbbunny we are in the Shoalhaven(but not for long!!!) lovely but my dd's are SOOOOOO English its untrue, we call them Elizabeth & Margaret((corbs I so know where you are coming from) despite, the many positives it is not "home" and I guess that is what pulls beatenbyayellowteacup ??
We did go back for huge holiday and loved it, despite shit weather, costs, crap road jams, we really loved it.
I will say corbs unless you can HAPPILY make a go of it, it may eat you up and who knows where that can lead?? How long have you been here??
We have been here 6 years so I think that's a fair shot.
My BF who was an Australian but sadly passed away had lived in UK for 16 years and prior to her illness & sad death wanted to return to Uk, I ramble a bit so sorry but have learned one thing from her wasted early demise is to not put off things or live with the what ifs.
You have no partner or kids to take into consideration, luckily my dd's were delighted the loser is my DH (bless him) but knows how sad and down (depressed even at points) so is moving for me, but it was very hard being honest with him.
As with the UAE a few friends have returned as cost of living was so high, so please check this out and read a book called BURQALICIOIS!!
Corbs if you need to vent I am your woman!!

Ah, you be south of Sydney then! I haven't been down there yet, but we're going to Canberra tomorrow to see what's what and then down to see that big mountain, Mount Kosciuszko.

Interesting what you are saying about things - DS is only 3, and still very English-sounding - but that will change when he goes to school of course :( and I don't know how I'll react to that...

But I can't see DH ever being happy to settle in the UK again, unless we have pots of money and can afford a largeish estate (the house doesn't need to be big, just have a reasonable amount of land) so I might have to just put up with things. :(

BURQALICIOIS is NOT representative of life in the UAE. It's like saying Diaries of a Call Girl is representative of life in the UK.

One example of what a load of rascist twaddle it is; they don't even really wear Burquas in the UAE. They wear Abayas with a headscarf.

I Know, its a bit of UAE chick lit!!!!! Just as allo allo is not representative of Nazi occupied France..... good lord lighten up.

Just as allo allo is not representative of Nazi occupied France..... good lord lighten up.

Allo Allo is fictional. Burqalicious is being published under "non fiction".

Weirdly, I find it hard to lighten up about lazy racial stereotyping and outright lies. Don't know why. I'm amazed she didn't throw in a few casual beheadings of shoplifters to go with the rest of her inaccuracies.

Get down off your soap box, I think most women on here can weed out the truth, FOR THEMSELVES.

Christ woman do you search through these posts to bring people to task???
I think you'd find it hard to lighten up about anything personally, you forgot to mention flogging and chopping off of hands.

NOTE TO SELF MUST READ MORE TROTSKY.......and not watch smutty exploitive crap on TV.

Coansha - we're only asking that you stop GENERALISING.

I'm posting from Qatar. I'm originally from NZ, been living in the UK for 10. Prior to that we lived in Sydney for 3 yrs. We're planning to move to Doha later this yr. Other peoples experiences are exactly that - we take this info on board but make our own decisions.

I would love to return to Sydney and love the lifestyle there. The UAE/Qatar is a big sandpit and for us a means to an end. But there is definitely some elements of Australia here, lots of huge blue sky for start, wonderful outdoor lifestyle in the winter rather than the summer, and here you are not so much a foreigner because all expats are foreigners, with a mix of cultures that are very inclusive unlike the UK.

Personally i would want to return to Sydney with a bit of money because the city is expensive to get established in. Teacher contracts at international schools here are fairly lucrative, but you'd have to do your sums to understand if it would be worth your while.

I have lived in Spain(5 yerars), France9!), Italy, Austria(2), Tunisia(1 only thank the lord), Andorra(2) NZ (1), UK(well born there) and OZ (6)and not for a 4 month holiday, LIVING.
So when the initial post about the concerns of moving etc which i am going through too, I actually thought my insight might be helpful, not general.
The comment about the book(lord above i mention the name again) was a for a bit of fluff. ok?
But goodness me, we are here to help people and learn, which I love about this sight, life is hard enough ebfore we start having ago at each other on here.
last post on this.

Yeah, sorry, I probably was being a bit arsey. Unfortunately I do find that a lot of people not familiar with the ME do tend to put all Arab people into the "Saudi" hand-chopping bracket, and books like this don't help. I had so many people just read Rod Liddle's famous article and think "well Rod Liddle is a reputable journalist so Dubai is definitely just like he portrays".

Hence conversations-

"So how do you get about?"
"I drive"
"I thought women weren't allowed to drive in Dubai?"
"No, that's in Saudi"

Repeat conversation for: working, drinking alcohol, not wearing a burkha, going out unaccompanied, not living on a compound etc etc etc