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Living overseas

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best career for a "trailing spouse"

23 replies

iskra · 25/01/2011 11:17

DP is very keen for us to move overseas (not imminent - in 3-5 years) with his work. I am happy to move overseas, but very very very keen on having my own career - so something that I can do both in the UK & hopefully in wherever we relocate to (likely to be short-ish 2 yr sort of things).

Is this just teaching, or is there something else to consider? Healthcare? International finance (haha)?

Any genius solutions?

OP posts:
overthemill · 25/01/2011 11:18

teaching, nursing, accountant sound transferable. usbourne books???

overthemill · 25/01/2011 11:19

hairdressing, beautician - always needed?

slim22 · 25/01/2011 13:49

depends where you are likely to go? might be restrictions to work on dependent visas.

any qualifications to date?

BlameItOnTheBogey · 25/01/2011 13:51

Journalist is a pretty good one if you are prepared to freelance. Teaching is definitely the safest bet.

Depending on where you are, things like yoga teacher can often give you opportunities within the expat community. What's your background?

Bisous · 25/01/2011 13:57

I think where you go makes a difference, but from my experience as the PP have written, teaching is nearly always a safe one!

GoingToBeSize12 · 25/01/2011 14:41

If I'd have known at 16 that I was going to spend most of my time living overseas with my DH I would have missed out A-levels and a degree and become a hairdresser and beautician. Then I'd always be able to work, even if just from home, earn my own salary and always have nice hair myself! :)

But I also agree teaching would be good.

iskra · 25/01/2011 14:52

All the signs point to teaching, don't they? I'm just not sure if I want to teach!

I don't quite have a background - I have two degrees in the humanities, but had DD at 24 (during the postgrad) & have been at home/volunteering/finishing the postgrad for the past 3 years. There were only 2 years of work after undergrad during which I bummed around overseas, basically. I have taught & written for pay though.

I don't know if I'm getting hung up on the wrong things, but I feel concerned that I need a career that I can do in different places, & pick up & put down, else I'm going to emerge at 50 with nothing to my name but a partner & children (who will be grown up by then). That sounds like vocational qualifications to me...

Not sure I could be a hairdresser or a beautician since I generally look like have been dragged through a hedge...

OP posts:
BlameItOnTheBogey · 25/01/2011 15:35

Well you could do a PGCE and that at least would give you an option? And then if you are still not sure, try your hand at freelance journalism or something whilst you are out there?

I do agree that it is good to have something to fall back on. Moving overseas can be really tough and anything that helps increase your independence is a good thing. HOw about working for an NGO? Would depend on where you ended up but there are some great jobs doing that sort of thing and you could spend the next 2 years volunteering with some NGOs in the UK to bolster your cv?

belgo · 25/01/2011 15:40

If you are moving to another english speaking country, then nursing is a transferable qualification but in the State you may have to pass exams there first.

You can do a two year short course in nursing in the UK if you already have a humanities degree.

If you are moving to a country where they speak a different language, you have two options:

1.Find a career where you can speak english eg English business/technical/medical writers are needed in many countries.

2.If you have a career where you will deal with local people eg. nursing, then you will need to learn the language.

Are there english/American schools in the country you will go to?

belgo · 25/01/2011 15:41

States as in US of America not 'State'.

anonymosity · 26/01/2011 00:46

I really think you need to know where you're going first and what restrictions you may face, VISA wise.

Then you need to look at what is needed in the local area. When we moved to Washington DC there was a huge calling for teachers of every ilk and many prestigious courses (1 yr or more) but after 18 months suddenly budgets for local schools lost millions in a re-think due to the recession and many of the part-time and speciality teachers, those newly qualified etc lost their jobs to balance the loss of budget.

While thinking about what you can do and what you like to do is essential, these are the kind of factors you'll be facing wherever you go.

exexpat · 26/01/2011 01:03

A Tefl qualification might be quicker and more portable than a PGCE - UK teaching qualifications aren't automatically accepted in other countries' school systems, so you might find yourself restricted to teaching in international schools, or constantly having to do update courses or deal with bureaucracy to qualify for local schools (SiL just had to do this in Canada). For international schools, I would guess primary teaching experience is in more demand and more flexible than specialist secondary subjects.

Journalism is also very portable, but it helps if you have been doing it here for a while first and have built up contacts.

Other things like a physio qualification could be quite useful - I have met a few British/Aussie trailing spouses who have set up their own physio practices catering to the expat community - people often prefer to go to someone who understands them when they say where it hurts...

Also photography - there are opportunities in expat-heavy places for English-speaking photographers who can do, dare I say it, Venture-style family portraits, or go round taking pictures at social events. If you could turn your hand to travel photography as well that would be a bonus.

slim22 · 26/01/2011 01:11

A fail proof area of work and very portable is relocation/estate agent.

You could start in the UK with big relocation firms/movers and capitalise on that when you move.

Basic local knowledge, you can research in the 6 months prior to move and build in 3 months if you are the extrovert type.
Often local language is not necessary because you would be liaising with newly relocated expats (pretty much all in english) and have local logistics support staff.

Another area of "expertise" that never fails to astonish me is "personnal life coaching" / "nutrition expert" / "personnal stylist/shopper" etc.... There are so many around and it seems like its a thriving business. Hmm
I guess if you are passionate about one of those areas it can be another aspect of the "teaching" scenario.

strandednomore · 26/01/2011 10:57

This SO depends on where you are moving to so I would discuss this with your DP first and then decide. If it is somewhere like China then I would say TEFL. If it is in the developing world but somewhere with a largish expat community, or the Middle East, then do some research into what expats want. Certainly in my experience, things like children's swimming coach, yoga or pliates teacher, personal fitness instructor, children's dance teacher etc were always in demand. I agree with everyone who said hairdresser - but you have already said that probably wouldn't be for you.

Otherwise, something like journalism (although this is tough to get into - I would probably look at a magazine writing course as a safer bet) or website design, something you can do from anywhere in the world.

If it's the first world eg the States, Australia or Europe then I don't have much experience but look at what is actually needed in that particular country.

And yes check working restrictions. I personally wasn't able to work in my last posting without losing my diplomatic status.Obtaining a work permit can also take a LONG time.

overthemill · 27/01/2011 09:00

the other thing to note is that some countries won't let a spouse work - it'll depend on visa. eg switzerland won't (or wouldn't when my friend went with dh. she couldn't even to 'party' type work)

kreecherlivesupstairs · 27/01/2011 09:55

I was going to add it depends on where and whether the country is developing or developed. Just before we left Thailand, I did a TESOL course. Had I done it when we arrived I'd have had four years of (poorly) paid work.
I was unable to work as a nurse because I couldn't read the exam paper.
I've just enrolled DD on a short after school yoga course. While trying to find out the contact info for the teacher I came across the a site where she is training people to teach to children. If we were going to be here longer it is something I would have considered.

GoldFrakkincenseAndMyrrh · 29/01/2011 08:25

Teaching is not as portable as you'd think - most countries will require you to rectify to teach in local schools and international schools can be very picky. TESOL/TEFL is good for most places though.

The relocation agent idea is a good one for areas with a high density of expats and a quick turnover, especially if you like finding out about places/getting to know people and aren't shy about asking contacts for cheeky favours.

It totally depends where you're likely to go. If you're teaching you need to do the training next year or the year after to get your 2 years in before international schools will consider you.

onimolap · 29/01/2011 08:44

TEFL is the obvious one because it surpasses any possible language barrier. Also possibly tutoring for UK boarding school and university entrance exams/interviews.

Journalism might work, especially if you stay linked with a UK publication (especially in lifestyle): local competition will probably be well ensconced in permanent positions at destination, and it would therefore be harder than usual to break into, other than freelance.

Otherwise, something self-employed and portable (either into the expat or local community). Pilates instructor? Ante- and post- natal support? BF counsellor? Beautician/hairdresser? Children's entertainer? PA? Cooking directors' lunches?

oranges · 29/01/2011 08:55

AIm any career at the expat community, or Britain. So relocation consultant, yoga teaching, or something like freelance journalism (though that;s hard to break into).

Timebends · 29/01/2011 09:06

It does depend where you go and it depends on your husband's job - hours/travel etc. It also depends upon whether you are likely to move to other countries or stay in the one you have chosen so that you can develop your career. This of course will be a completely different prospect in a developed country.

Nursing hours don't mix awfully well with children, a husband who might be travelling and no family around. Jobs like nursing and beauty therapy practical jobs - tend to be done in certain countries (Middle East/ Asia) by low paid locals or by immigrants from the Philippines or India.

Teaching has the advantage in that you will be employed on western style wages in British or International Schools , but it is true that the reputable schools will only really take you with at least 2 years experience. And you truly wouldn't want to work in some of the not-so-good schools. Tefl isn't usually regarded as a a career - more a part time job though you can earn well if you are good.

You can probably write if you don't depend on the money as there are often local expat magazines around. Tutoring English/writing might be a pastime. You might find work (in Asia or similar) writing and corecting English flyers for local businesses who want to attract expats to their product. Or helping with websites. In this kind of country women often set up small businesses to fill perceived gaps. eg: training maids in hygiene or cooking, holding writing groups or A Level/degree level study groups.

To be honest, 2 years will fly past as it takes most of a year to settle and it will be take a lot of your time helping children settle comfortably and make friends. If you've been happy with study and otherwise unstructured work until now, why will that change?

Go to www.expatexpert.com for advice from Robin Pascoe. She has written widely and sensibly on the life and problems of trailing spouses. There is also an trailing spouse's book by another author called "Career in your suitcase" to describe people in your position, written by a trailing spouse who wanted to have a career. (Don't believe her entirely when she claims to have succeeded - though it might be fair to say she has succeeded in achieving her own aims but there is bit of self promotion there).

Put bluntly, few trailing spouses manage a proper career if they have to move regularly. The exceptions are those who already have one before moving and even then it's hard. You can usually get a job of some kind though and even if you don't, you probably will, if you've the energy, manage to fill your time in a way you find productive, though without possibly making much money, if that's ok for you. Ask yourself if that's worked for you so far. The difficulties I describe are leading to companies having trouble finding good people for overseas postings because as more women (usually women) insist on their own careers, is is very hard to move dual career couples around.

The things that have worked for me have been online study and teaching (sorry - but if you are not keen don't train as it's hard work and expat parents in a good school are VERY demanding of your professional skills). For online study look at OU, Oxford University online short courses and browse other universities.

I have not regretted my peripatetic life at all, but I had reached a reasonable stage in my teaching career before setting out abroad and I wanted to stop and enjoy my children and have a change. I have done all those things and had fascinating times. I can't pretend to have had a career (though I have enjoyed the work have done) but my husband has had a wonderful one. You are very sensible though to imagine life at 50 without a career. It is a watershed for anyone when children leave, but extra tough if you are still moving round the world by that time because once the children have gone your life has no structure if you have no job and your friends are likely to be scattered round the world.

None of this applies if you're intending to go to somewhere like Australia and stay put for a good long time of course!

neversaydie · 29/01/2011 10:06

How about developing an area of work that you can do at a distance, doing most of the communication on line? As an example, my sister is an editor, and a while ago she managed to keep working in a job she originally held in Vienna, when her husband moved to Chile.

I am not sure how many of these sort of jobs exist - you need to be self starting and very good, I suspect, to be considered. But it would allow you to sustain a career of some sort in the longer term, and would I think also get you round any work permit issues.

Lollypolly · 29/01/2011 10:24

Tefl is def the most popular in most countries I have lived. I translate freelance but want to get into something more creative - thinking about make-up artist / hairdresser.

You don't say whether you are married OP. Just a quick word of wisdom.. in Dubai, I had to find a job where my employer sponsored my visa as DH and I weren't married at the time - this was extremely difficult but I managed (although this is going back 12 years or so). In Singapore 10 years ago, also not married, the same thing happened but in order to apply for my visa my employer had to prove that no-one else in the country could do the job. Fortunately it was very niche so I got my visa. Work visas as a trailing spouse are much easier to get in certain countries if you are married - if you are common-law spouse or long term partner etc you sometimes have to apply for a full work permit as an individual which can be pretty difficult. Worth looking into - obviously more conservative countries stick to this policy more than others.

tigerfrog · 29/01/2011 10:43

I have been following my husband for quite a few years. I worked as a primary school teacher before I left so I have been able to work in the British internatinal school system. I have worked in some fantastic schools and also one terrible school that was so poorly resourced it was an embarrassment! Although now I have my own children I am intending on a move back to our last country before this move!
I am so glad I kept up my carreer. Over the years I have meet many wives who have regretted putting their carreer aside for the sake of their husbands.
Teaching is not the perfect job for everyone but I have always enjoyed it.

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