RE: Moving back to U.K.

[Torta]

:) Hi, have lived abroad now for 20 years, I live in beautiful Mallorca;, left London in 1990, when I was only a young, 24 yr old... I'd LOVE to return home to London, I have all my family here (London) and my eldest son, 16yrs at boarding school; but I have that awful dreaded emotion inside, called 'fear' I wont be able to find a job - will I? Not at my age? I speak three languages fluently - would life be very difficult? We are seriously contemplating it, miss the culture, the buzz... Miss a 'real' life! Am very happily married, hubby that adores me, another boy of 12yrs - Life has been wonderful, utterly blessed but cannot help my feelings... (confused)

Of course you'd be able to find a job. You're only 44. You have another 21 years of work left (maybe more if they raise the retirement age as they're threatening to do!).

It might not be a very grand job, but you WILL get a job.

Or how about re-training to do something you've always wanted to do?

Funnily enough, I know what you mean by a 'real' life. I live in Turkey and I don't feel this is 'real' either.....

I live in Italy and I want to go back but so does ALL my family. So we are trying to do it now.

Have you any contacts left in the UK to help you on your way?

smile Oh Thanks, Guys! longgrasswhispers,Riven,happychappy, Cannot tell you how this is SO REASSURING! THANK YOU! happychappy, I am Italian; I appreciate all your comments; yes, we live in a world where 'youth' is front page news and just look at the magazines! What people fail to understand is that it is so 'IN' ´attractive to be a '40 & 50 something' in the 21st century! And have a mind that is inquisitive and full of wisdom! Yes, have contacts and family back there, but don't like to impose too much. I am on with my quest anyway, I have to fly regularly for my eldest boy, so will make the most of my time and be 'ultra' proactive. Definitely don't wish to live in London - too fast and noisey - like to visit but have to get out! No, it will be in the country, working from home if I can, LOVE writing, haven't you guessed? Does anybody know of any writing courses or colleges, maybe night classes one could train? If we move, it will be down by the coast; Brighton area, little antique shops and english tea houses... LOVE IT! Just get goosebumps just thinking about it! Hahahahaha! Thank you, all SO much!!!! grin

Another one in Italy who will go home sooner or later

I think it's easier to find a job in the UK than most places, in the sense that the jobs that are available, no matter what they are, however well-paid, or menial, are advertised properly and given to people on merit, not through the old my-cousin-has-a-neighbour-whose-sister-in-law's-uncle needs someone network. I think also, there is more acceptance of mobility regarding jobs in the UK- I am a graduate, but worked in WH Smith for 2 yrs while waiting for my civil service placement to come through. Here, certainly, people tend to work in the same sector/wage bracket for ever and ever.

Oh what a shame :( so for the writing courses one would really have to look on the internet? Also, depending in which area...

Yes, if we leave here it won't be before next summer, much to plan and organize before then, goodness, 20 years is along time! A new placement for another school for the 12 yr old. The 16 yr old doing (those four letter exams) GCSE next June... The mind is thinking and it's saying... "Would you like the U.K. again after 20 yrs, remember it is not like you left it, in 1990?" And true in U.K. the pace of life is very accelerated. It is very much an indoor life, not like here, in the outdoor... But it's the culture aspect of things for the boys, that I am looking at... All brilliant living here when they were born, by the sea, growing into free spirited beings, climbing trees, skittling along naked; swimming in the pool, everything connected to nature, so wholesome and healthy. Everything is very ('tranki' tranki') - (tranquil) what doesn't get done today will get done tomorrow attitude... "Quality of Life," we gained but gave up "the quantity" in 1990! Beautiful, fresh food, then the climate... The boys are growing though and climbing trees, running around naked in the garden, picking fruit off trees doesn't last forever, they need 'other' things, their minds need to be developed and they must be exposed to opportunities and here, very little of that... I am really very calm about this, practical and realistic. I know what it is like to live in U.K. I am not a refugee coming from a third world country, does that sound terrible? I was born in U.K., educated, lived there for 24 yrs of the first part of my life... But nothing lasts forever and I do believe in 'Change' 'Growth' and heck, I feel I have so much to give and yet, I hear this voice telling me, "it 'ain't going to be happening here," So great to share all this with you, guys. Sometimes I feel selfish because life is wonderful and I am so utterly blessed and grateful for EVERYTHING! Our surroundings are what one reads in fairy books; yet why the void? I will keep going with the flow with this, will put it out there and see what the universe throws back... Thank you all so much for allowing me to share, If you feel the energy to write, please, any feedback helps SO MUCH! THANK YOU! xx :)

wink Thank you!

It's hard when it's about feelings, i.e you know it would be better but then there's a slight fear or worry. Sometimes you have to throw yourself in at the deep end and just deal with it. Even if there are a few cons aswell as pros it's not going to be the end of the world, it's Britain in 2010 and compared to a lot of countries seems like paradise! and never say never, you could always move back, nothings set in stone. It makes life more interesting, and you and your family would definitely gain from it, even if it's just 'life experience'.

P.s speaking 3 languages would be very beneficial job seeking in brighton, and for home jobs too, translating, proof reading etc.

@ LaRagazzaInglese; Thank you for this and your encourgement! Very positive! A week or so later and I browse back at this thread: My homelife, surroundings here are very lovely here. Very wholesome! One cannot have everything in life, or can they? There are things here, the U.K. does not have and will never have but there are things in U.K. that will never happen for us here - what do I/we want? We have worked hard to reep the rewards and sacrificed alot over the years and of course, we have been patient too - (BIG one that one...) When I speak of my surroundings, I do not mean in terms of possessions and material things; I mean in terms of quality of life. I am on with some things right as I must have my youngest son, who is 12 yrs means assessed in the United Kingdom. He may have a learning difficulty. I have decided to go ahead with this and this should all take place around November time int he U.K. I will see how I feel and will listen to my feelings and intuition once I receive the results from the appropriate educational psychologists we will then review our current situation with my husband and family and will take the situation on from there... it is small, little steps that bring you closer to your goals.

We shall see what happens and will keep you all posted of the progression... For now, one cannot think too much of what is ahead as it still hasn't happened, and cannot think too much of the past because that has all happened and gone. Can only remain in the 'Present' moment for now otherwise I will blur out all the 'JOY' that is going on right now so, just have to be very aware with everything, weigh it all up and go with the flow of life... Thank you! :)

Torta

Maybe you could come over and spend a few weeks in the UK. I think for some that restlessness is part of their temperament. Do not jump. The UK weather is pretty depressing and with the tories making cuts it is not the most positive country to be in at the moment.
I went back this summer and was so glad to return overseas where we have a more outdoor life.Maybe i would feel differently after 20 years.....

I know people who have moved back from oz and regretted it- moved back to OZ within 2 years.

I just mean- really consider how green your grass is-the UK is expensive, cold, wet and life can be very pedestrian when you are indoors so much. Your life there sounds great- you may miss it!!

@ missslc :)

Thank you for your note dated, 5th October. You are right! I am half Italian as it is, so I am very mediterranean in my ways... I think you are SO absolutely right: And a girl friend of mine only reminded me yesterday when we were both in the car; how does one wish to see their life? The glass half empty or half full... Mine, right now is rather full at the moment, and quite honestly, I am always coming and going for my other son who is in London and at school there. Right now I have the best of both worlds... Only an 1 & 50 minutes away on the plane too! It is always good to write ones feelings down on paper, truly one has to think about things rationally. When I look back at this thread which I began on 21st September, my feelings are not the same as today, 4th November - I mean I am grateful for everything, I am 'in Gratification mode' right now - my values are still the same and my husband and boys mean the world to me! YES, the U.K. has become terribly, terribly expensive! People are very insular and everyone seems to go by this protocol, which I am not into at all!!And then the cuts! Things are no better here, economy wise but - I AM CONTENT! You are right! The grass always seems greener, but is it really??? We all sit at different angles of the garden and we all see it with different perceptions... I think everything at the end of the day is all relative, it is what works for you and the best for your family... Will check back in a few weeks... thank you so much for your positivity and encouragement, though! :)