Widowed Dad with cancer and I have no POA

[Totallybannanas]

He is starting to get quite poorly now and feeling overwhelmed with everything, I want to take some of the stresses away. I know having to ring for help, advice and appointments is getting to him. When I've tried, they refuse to speak to me. We don't have a POA and my dad is single and lives alone. Is there anything with can out in place quickly, or a form we can compete with the hospital. It will be me and his sister who are supporting him.

I think the only thing you can do is apply for the POA which won't be quick sorry.

Sometimes, if you're talking to utilities, banks, council etc etc on the phone your dad can give verbal consent over the phone for them to speak to you whilst he's there.

I would expect that quite a few places will
allow him to give permission for you to deal with them in his place. Things like utilities and the gp wil definitely offer this. POA will probably take months.

Apply for POA now. Can fill in a 3rd party access form to deal with GP. Could open a joint bank account which both can manage individually. That might help with some day to day management tasks, bills etc if he moves his current account to the new joint one.
I used to call my mum's bank on speaker with her and she'd give consent for me to deal with stuff. She was always there listening in and would chip in if needed.

If he has capacity, POA for health is irrelevant. Hospitals, GPs etc will what his consent to talk to you. Our GP was happy with just a signed simple letter.

If he is very poorly, has anyone given you an idea about prognosis? LPOA takes several weeks/months to arrive once you have submitted it. Unfortunately most families I speak to who are suddenly thinking about LPOA have left it too late.

Agree with others that utilities will allow you to deal with things on his behalf once he has given permission and this can usually be done over the phone. GP will accept a letter signed by him, or at least that’s what we found. With the bank, can you be put on the account as a third party member? I did this with my parents, and although it’s just Mum now, I have a debit card so I can get her any shopping and pay bills/set up dd etc for her via banks app. This way I can help but don’t have any tax implications which I would do on a joint account.

What sorts of things would you like to do for him, is there a macmillan, Marie curie or district nurse that can help sort out personal help and appointments.

No, not sure on prognosis as early stages. It's things we need to put in place but I don't want to abuse extra stress with form filling etc, I've managed to get a form from housing so he has just signed that. I just want to make things as easy for him as possible. I wonder if I can just get a form from the bank and do the same.

An I ask what happens if he gets too ill and he has no POA? Who makes the decision about his care then?

Utilities can be direct debit, arrange online food shopping, what help do you think he would like. Banks need to see people face to face, you might be able to set up 3rd party access to his bank account, I think natwest and santander offer home visits.

The doctors will, he could also speak with his GP about a RESPECT form which outlines his wishes its not legally binding but helps health professional know what he'd like. Has he made a will and also been referred to specialist nurses

The decision would be made 'in his best interests' by the doctor treating him - this involves finding out from those that know him what they can tell you about his wishes in those circumstances.

My experience in many years of palliative care, is that for most cancers the period where someone lacks capacity is usually brief, unlike dementia, as the situation is then rapidly deteriorating. It's rare for there not to be consensus although it does happen.

You can make health and financial LPAs this weekend online on the gov website.

If his wishes are simple (ie: to make you and your aunt his joint & several attorneys) it'll take you less than an hour to complete the forms and print them. Then sign and post them off. Read the instructions carefully, and you won't go wrong.

It may take a few weeks/months for the LPA to be registered by the Government, so get the process started asap. There are other things you can do now to help your dad manage his accounts etc (as others have suggested above), but nothing is as good as an LPA

I do not have POA for my mum but I do have DWP appointee status which involves an interview at DFs house with you present. Go on the Gov.uk website. We got that done quite quickly. It allows you apply for any benefits he may need and to speak on his behalf regarding state pension.

It at will get something in place while you get
POA sorted out.

You can apply for POA online. I would get the ball rolling now.

He could just put daughter on his account

Definitely apply for a poa today online. Fill it in, print it off and get it signed. The signatures needed are the attorney (s), your Dad and a friend or neighbour who has known him several years and believes him to be in his right mind ie willing agreeing that the attorney can take over financial and health decisions when necessary. Two different documents. When signed send them off to the address on the form. If filled out correctly you will hear back usually within a month.