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Original poster

Mum dying and in shock

42 replies

Saddogmum73 · 01/08/2023 22:52

In the space of 3 weeks my mum has gone from being a fit 70 year old to having cancer in both lungs, breast, bowel, stomach, liver, brain and bones. Doctors have now confirmed she has days left. I can’t believe it and am in shock. Not sure what I am looking for but writing it down makes it more real.

OP posts:
determinedtomakethiswork · 08/08/2023 23:58

I am so so sorry. What a terrible loss. 💐

TodaysNameIsZig · 09/08/2023 00:16

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Knackeredhamster · 09/08/2023 09:56

I'm sorry 😞 op.

Cancer is just a bastard. My mum is nearing the end.

Hugs to you. Xx

Cowlover89 · 09/08/2023 10:03

I'm so sorry ❤

justanothermanicmonday1 · 09/08/2023 10:38

Saddogmum73 · 08/08/2023 23:18

Sorry for disappearing, my lovely mum died earlier today, she wasn’t in pain but I don’t think I will ever get over seeing her shrinking and getting weaker and weaker in front of me.
In less than a month fit to being gone. Funeral is Thursday.
Thank you for all of your posts and sorry for anyone else who has gone through or is going through this.
F*uck cancer.

Heart goes out to you, OP. Please look after yourself 💐 xxx

CrotchetyQuaver · 09/08/2023 11:03

So sorry to read this. I lost my DF 12 days after he was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer, he was older but up until a month before he died was fully functioning, independent and still driving. It was a hell of a shock and there wasn't any time to get to grips with the situation. He accepted the game was up and too far gone for treatment. Thinking of you xx

hopelessbusiness · 09/08/2023 17:13

Joining in with the 'fuck cancer' cry - lost my lovely brother (55) in May, 9 weeks after a diagnosis of metastatic liver cancer. The speed of it makes it so hard to process.
Take care of yourself. I'm so very sorry for your loss.

Hugasauras · 09/08/2023 17:22

Thinking of you for tomorrow, OP. It'll be a hard day but take the time to be present in the moment and give your emotions the space they need. For me, the grieving really began after the funeral because that's when there was the time and space to absorb the enormity of what's happened. Wishing you well as your lovely mum begins her final journey with you all by her side Flowers

RedDoughnut · 09/08/2023 18:02

I'm so sorry.

Fuck cancer indeed!

Loobyloo68 · 09/08/2023 18:26

My 80 year old mum is in the local hospice receiving end of life care, she's gone from a size 16 to less than a 6 in a year, she has been in hospital twice in the last few months. Like the OPs mum, she has cancer everywhere and it's so hard watching her waste away and her crying in pain. Her morphine has been increased and sedatives given as she is anxious, I know its wrong but I just wish she could go to sleep and die peacefully, it's torture for us all at the moment.

Lemonademoney · 09/08/2023 18:29

I’m so sorry. We lost our seven year old very suddenly eight years ago. The shock and trauma and physical pain of such a sudden significant loss is huge and takes a long time to process. Be so incredibly kind to yourself x

Ilikewinter · 09/08/2023 18:40

Oh my goodness, im so sorry OP 💐💐

yummymctummy · 09/08/2023 18:46

Op I really feel for you and your family. This is a devastating shock for you all. Just take one day at a time and be with your precious mum .

yummymctummy · 09/08/2023 18:48

Oh op im so sorry I didmt read your latest post. Im incredibly sorry for you loss. Sending you love and hugs at this difficult time xxxxx

NurseP · 09/08/2023 19:07

@Loobyloo68 , it is not wrong to wish a speedy, peaceful death. I'm sorry that you are all suffering.

So sorry for everyone in this position.

10 years ago, My lovely Dad died 7 months after being given 3 weeks. It was a bloody awful time and I wish he had died after the 3 weeks as watching him fade was truly shit.

Cancer is an arse!!

Run4it2 · 10/08/2023 21:02

I'm so sorry - hope you got through the funeral ok. Do try and make space for yourself in the coming weeks. Thinking of you x

Original poster
Saddogmum73 · 23/09/2023 20:32

I just wanted to come back and update. The first month I felt absolutely exhausted all the time, even when I hadn’t done much. It’s now a few weeks on and slowly starting to feel a bit better but it still doesn’t seem real. My dad came to stay a couple of weeks ago for a week and it was lovely having him here but so strange that mum wasn’t with him. Life goes on but it’s still hard.

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