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Life-limiting illness

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DD has skin cancer at 25.

45 replies

stillvicarinatutu · 17/08/2022 22:35

I'm reeling. Dd turned 25 last month and today she told me she has skin cancer . she will need a skin graft . She has been referred and should be seen within 2 weeks .

Has anyone else been here ? What will happen now ? How quickly can they tell what stage it's at?
I'm worried because she had this growth for a year , doctors dismissed it a year ago but now they suspect it's cancer and have referred her to a specialist to be seen within 2 weeks .
She appears unfazed and I darent ask too much because she said please don't start wittering about it . She has had a lot of holidays abroad and used to use sun beds even though I always said not to .
She's taken it better than me I think .

OP posts:
workshy46 · 17/08/2022 22:37

A year she should be ok and generally it takes longer to develop into a more serious problem. My DD had abnormal cells and she had it for a year almost - it hadn't developed into anything but it would in 2/3 years
Wish you and your DD all the best

thenightsky · 17/08/2022 22:41

My sister had it when she was 26. She was obsessed with being tanned all year round, burning herself in the sun abroad in the summer and sitting under a sunbed every day in winter, despite being a natural pale skinned blonde. She had it cut out and a skin graft. She celebrates her 60th birthday next month.

stillvicarinatutu · 17/08/2022 22:45

Thank you - that's reassuring.

I'm just concerned because I fear something underlying. She's had covid 3 times , she's always ill, she has an enlarged nymph gland in her groin , she's lacking iron , I went with her to gp 2 years ago and asked about blood cancers , due to the constant illness and lymph node being enlarged but they dismissed it and now she says I'm to stop going on about it , but she just seems to be always ill. I truly hope it's nothing they can't treat by cutting it out .

OP posts:
Ohsugarhoneyicetea · 17/08/2022 22:55

Covid gave me neutropenia, could be why she is always sick.

QuebecBagnet · 17/08/2022 22:59

So if she should be seen in 2 weeks has she just seen her GP and is now on a two week wait for dermatology? Because my gp said I had a melanoma but she wasn’t sure if it was basal cell or squamous and referred me on a two week wait and it was neither. Totally benign.

Hellocatshome · 17/08/2022 23:01

In general terms skin cancer is easily treatable, try not to worry until she has been seen. As it happens I went to the Dr on Friday and I am having my appointment under the 2 week referral tomorrow for suspected skin cancer. I think the quickness of the appointment makes it seem urgent but the Doctor was telling me with most skin cancers they could be left for weeks/months/years and not get worse or spread to other areas.

Hellocatshome · 17/08/2022 23:06

QuebecBagnet · 17/08/2022 22:59

So if she should be seen in 2 weeks has she just seen her GP and is now on a two week wait for dermatology? Because my gp said I had a melanoma but she wasn’t sure if it was basal cell or squamous and referred me on a two week wait and it was neither. Totally benign.

Yes also this. It might not even be skin cancer.

Huntswomanonthemove · 17/08/2022 23:06

Malignant melanoma is the serious skin cancer. There are others that are easily treated and don’t really spread. I hope your daughter has one of the easily treated ones.

No one should wait and be fobbed off, if they have skin growths.

stillvicarinatutu · 17/08/2022 23:11

It's been a year . But hopefully as you all pointed out - if it's confirmed most are treatable . I've not dared Google .

OP posts:
PicketRingFenced · 17/08/2022 23:14

It's fine it doesn't spread and it isn't life threatening.

Luredbyapomegranate · 17/08/2022 23:21

A friend of mine (early 40s) had a spot that wouldn’t go on her face for about 18 months. Turned out to be skin cancer. She is totally fine now as it sounds like your daughter will be.

Daisy03 · 17/08/2022 23:21

So has she had a biopsy and know what type of cancer it? It's really impossible to know if it is cancer unless this has happened.

sunshinefordays · 17/08/2022 23:22

@stillvicarinatutu I was diagnosed with malignant melanoma in 2020 when I was 29 years old. They acted very quickly and did a wide excision to remove extra tissue and I ended up having a sentinel lymph node biopsy/removal as well to see if it had spread. Hopefully your daughter will be seen by a great dermatology team. Malignant melanoma can spread quickly but there are different types of skin cancer, some of which are very slow growing. I hope your daughter makes a full recovery and has a lovely team looking after her.

PicketRingFenced · 17/08/2022 23:27

PicketRingFenced · 17/08/2022 23:14

It's fine it doesn't spread and it isn't life threatening.

Sorry what I meant is it doesn't spread elsewhere ie to the rest of the body like other cancers

EmergencyHepNeeded · 17/08/2022 23:29

My mum had this when she was in her 50s and she is now in her 90s. Your daughter should be seen very quickly and it will be removed. Hopefully she won't need any further treatment after that. All good luck to her.

NannyGythaOgg · 17/08/2022 23:32

QuebecBagnet · 17/08/2022 22:59

So if she should be seen in 2 weeks has she just seen her GP and is now on a two week wait for dermatology? Because my gp said I had a melanoma but she wasn’t sure if it was basal cell or squamous and referred me on a two week wait and it was neither. Totally benign.

3 different skin cancers
squamous cell and basal cell which are both curable. not malignant in that they do not go on to secondaries (although can be disfiguring if ignored for long enough) so do need treating.

Melanoma is different - it is malignant and if not treated early enough will spread and, if not treated early enough, will lead to death. BUT so long as it is treated early enough is also curable.

My sister was diagnosed with melanoma in the early 1980s when it was still uncommon here. She was not diagnosed early as it was an unusual cancer in the UK then (ozone layer depletion, foreign holidays and sunbeds have changed that). She already had secondaries and was very lucky to live for 17 years before dying of secondaries. (That is over 30 years since she died.)

Your daughter is being seen early AND treatments are far more specific and effective now. Although there is an outside chance, I really doubt you have anything to worry about

ginswinger · 17/08/2022 23:35

I've had skin cancer so maybe I can give you some reassurances about the processes. So I don't know who she has seen or what treatments she's had but it's normal to 1. see the GP, then 2. a dermatologist who will likely remove the growth and test for cancer. If that is positive, they seek to dig it out and lymph nodes too to check to see whether there's spread. If there's no spread, she will get a consultant for the operation then a long period (five years or so) or check ups for more growths.

Now if she's just seen GP, unless they are a specialist, it's early days. She might be calm because they haven't given her a pathway for treatment. This means it's early days, they can remove the growth under a local anesthetic and do the tests for cancer. This is usually done with small margins and maybe 3 stitches depending on the size of it. Test results come back in a matter of days. They will be able to determine the depth of the cancer with a stage number. I was a 1b so early days.

If she's a bit further down the road and has a diagnosis, she should have a cancer stage number. From there it's a bigger op under general anesthetic. she will no doubt need a bit of support, it's a big op. I had 8cm of skin removed for a 7mm mole so they go in and take wide margins to get everything. The lymph nodes drain off fluid from your body and can take a while to heal whilst they divert the fluids. I had a bag to drain the fluid for several weeks. I took a month to get back to work. After the big op you'll get a call with the results as to whether its spread about a week later.

With regards to a skin graft-I don't know. I have a large scar but am expected to live with it. I suspect if it's a place that could be life changing (like the face), skin grafts might be part of the end process of recovery. Scars can be improved by massage and using skin gels to aid recovery. Specialist masseurs can help with techniques as can the consultant.

It is quite scary but skin cancer care in the UK is good. I'm lucky because I have a relative who is a melanoma specialist and coached me through the results. I'm happy if you want to PM me for a hand hold.

stillvicarinatutu · 17/08/2022 23:35

Thank you all . I guess I just have to sit tight and wait to find out what exactly it is after biopsy.
I'm trying so hard not to worry. Appreciate all the replies so thank you x

OP posts:
stillvicarinatutu · 17/08/2022 23:39

All that is niggling me is that she has had an enlarged lymph node for a few years in her groin . They keep saying it's because she is very slim and bony so it can be seen and felt - but now this on top is making me wonder . I tried a few years ago to get them to do more tests but they dismissed me and then she accused me of scaremongering so I backed off .

OP posts:
SaltedCaramelPopcorn · 17/08/2022 23:43

I know the waiting for treatment is a really stressful time! I was diagnosed with a fast growing basal cell carcinoma on my face last year which required a skin flap (decided against graft as on my face).

Was also diagnosed with a malignant melanoma this year following a skin check with my dermatologist where she decided to check a mole she was unsure off. That was treated with a wide local excision and no further treatment needed.

The ops aren't pleasant but most of the time the surgery will be the only thing that's needed followed by regular skin checks and obviously being very diligent about wearing factor 50 at all times & covering up when it's sunny. For what it's worth, I've never been on a sunbed or sunbathed (burn too easily!). Doctor just said I've got that type of skin.

SaltedCaramelPopcorn · 17/08/2022 23:47

Oh and even though I had 10 stitches in my face with the skin flap, the scar is barely visible 18 months on and no one notices unless I point it out!

ginswinger · 17/08/2022 23:50

There's a good support group on FB called melanomamates you might like to lurk in. https://www.facebook.com/groups/686051851532653
It's for those with a diagnosis and their families. They are more for people going through treatment rather than waiting on results but you'll find them welcoming and kind.

Clearthinking · 17/08/2022 23:52

I think 6 close family members have had it, all lopped off. Dads was the worst on his back it had been there so long one day I said please ask them to check this. It had been growing a long time. It was skin cancer. They cut it straight out right down through layers of fat and skin. Follow up checks every 3 months hes doing good all gone and this had been lurking sometime over 5 years I think

ToppCat · 18/08/2022 00:03

PicketRingFenced · 17/08/2022 23:27

Sorry what I meant is it doesn't spread elsewhere ie to the rest of the body like other cancers

That isn’t true of all skin cancers. Some do spread to other parts of the body.

whynotwhatknot · 18/08/2022 00:12

i was going to say skin cancers can spread elsewhere-sorry to hear your news op hopefully its not serious