Excuse me if this is the wrong place for this.
My DH was diagnosed with Stage 3 cancer 3 years ago. After 2.5 years his scan showed new tumours so it's now Stage 4. They are relatively slow growing and not affecting his life at the moment, although treatment is giving him fatigue.
He's having 'state of the art' new treatment (targeted drugs and immunotherapy) which so far have shown some slight reduction in one tumour but possibly not the larger one - dr isn't sure from the scan.
I find this very hard to cope with. it's the sheer uncertainty. One the one hand, thee new drugs provide some hope and some patients are in remission with them (bit not many.)
All our plans of what to do with our lives are not shattered. He'd just retired after a full-on job he loved and we hoped to have time to enjoy life as our adult DCs are now independent.
I can't accept this is our life now, and the not knowing of how long he may have is dreadful. It could be years if treatment works, but on the other hand, it may not work at all.
My friends are supportive, but this is not how I expected our lives to be.
My parents were together till their mid-90s and I somehow assumed as we were healthy and fit, we'd have the same time.
It's a bugger.