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Original poster

The calm before the storm

999 replies

Willowkins · 02/06/2018 12:55

I previously posted under the title: I'm not OK - about my lovely DH with stage 4 bowel cancer.

We heard a few weeks ago that DH has refractory disease - basically the chemo is not working. We see the oncologist this week for the results of the latest MRI and hopefully a new plan but it's not looking good.

I am sitting here in the sunshine and the birds are singing but I know we have dark days ahead. I'm trying to stay strong for the family.

Just needed to share with you good folks as can't really talk about this in RL.

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loubieloo4 · 17/03/2020 04:01

Just popping this here for a more detailed list of vulnerable people under 70 that need to self "distance" for CV-19

www.gov.uk/government/publications/covid-19-guidance-on-social-distancing-and-for-vulnerable-people/guidance-on-social-distancing-for-everyone-in-the-uk-and-protecting-older-people-and-vulnerable-adults

Hope everyone is a well as they can be

notapizzaeater · 17/03/2020 10:00

We're getting ready to lock down here, it's like a check list.

DH - diabetes check, kidney disease check, cancer check !

On a positive note PIP won't be doing a face to face on DH so should be doing it based on hospital reports Grin

yoloPenguinsEatfish · 17/03/2020 12:22

Still no sensible advice on self-isolating for DD1, and presumably me as I have to collect her from the airport. She and her team are sure they've all had, she's still coughing, but it's not a 'new' cough which the UK govt says is what matters.

Scary times, especially on top of what you all are dealing with Flowers Wine and hugs - safe if via internet.

notapizzaeater · 17/03/2020 16:56

Ffs - the biopsy didn't get 'the right tissue' were not sure what's next tbh, we are fast running out of options .....

yoloPenguinsEatfish · 17/03/2020 18:06

so sorry nota we had that a few times. It doesnt inspire confidence Flowers any idea of new date?

Frikonastick · 18/03/2020 04:36

Hi everyone, well a mixed bag of results, not worst case but not best case, sort of in the middle. Which I am trying very hard to feel / treat like a victory. I hear you on the biopsy difficulty @notapizzaeater they can’t get to DHs which limits treatment options from our very narrow field of three to two.

notapizzaeater · 18/03/2020 10:31

@Frikonastick you have to take every little crumb as a win.

We've asked for a telephone consultation- whether we get it is another matter ! We aren't back to see Dr till 30th and if they want more tests its more waiting ......

yoloPenguinsEatfish · 18/03/2020 22:09

frik ok, in the middle is better than being on the downside?
nota DH oncology appt next week has been changed to a phone consultation. Not sure if colonoscopy will be cancelled though.

On the bright side, DD1 is home safe from France tonight and I dont think she has CV. In the car on the way home she was full of self-isolation talk, but one sight of the dog (!) and her dad and that has all gone by the wayside.

notapizzaeater · 18/03/2020 22:57

Feel awful today, DH wanted to go out to see a friend till I pointed out we are supposed to be on lockdown 😥

It's going to be a long long 12 weeks .....

notapizzaeater · 18/03/2020 22:59

@yoloPenguinsEatfish DS is / was anaphylactic to prawns and was due to have a prawn challenge all day tomorrow to see if he's out grown it, it's been cancelled today for the foreseeable - fingers crossed for you

yoloPenguinsEatfish · 18/03/2020 23:02

nota actually in your and DH situation, I'd say go for it - sit outside in a pub garden, no man hugs, etc etc. sorry abut the prawn challenge (which sounds like a dreadful ITV show Grin) hope you can get some answers soon.

loubieloo4 · 18/03/2020 23:03

DH's oncologist appointment for scan results next Wednesday has been changed to a phone consultation, he has also been given a time slot for bloods on Monday.

Original poster
Willowkins · 18/03/2020 23:26

Just checking in to see how you're all getting on in these difficult times. I imagine you're all stocked up on hand sanitiser anyway (I found a bottle under the sink left over from last year). Stay safe. Gin

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verygrumpyoldwoman · 20/03/2020 12:58

Quick straw poll... what is really sensible in terms of precautions. I was about to head out to pick something up at the shops. DP thinks under no circumstance should I go out without mask & gloves; I think with sensible social distancing and handwashing, all is fine.
What makes sense - what is everyone else doing.
I majorly need to get out!!

yoloPenguinsEatfish · 20/03/2020 13:38

verygrumpyoldwoman we are struggling with what it all actually means too. Stir craziness is a major factor. We're just all washing our hands a lot and trying to keep a distance from each other - when we remember - and a greater distance from other people.

notapizzaeater · 20/03/2020 15:58

We're off to the hairdressers in a min, will wash hands and face as soon as we get in but it's going to be hard to do nothing g for 12 weeks, we might end up killing one another

verygrumpyoldwoman · 20/03/2020 15:59

We seem to be in debate.
I figure that being sensible with hygiene and social distancing is enough - him indoors thinks masks / gloves / wiping down any shopping arriving in case anyone with virus has touched it is required. Think there is going to be a major falling out, and it's more likely to be me than covid-19 or cancer that might kill him.
Would be good if there was some more specific guidance for people in our position?

yoloPenguinsEatfish · 20/03/2020 16:32

It's so hard to know what to do... no one wants to be reckless, but if you know time is possibly limited then you need to be making the most of opportunities as safely as you can. DH is remarkably cavalier about the whole thing, DD1 veers between hysteria and forgetfulness, DD2 is the clean freak and I just kind of mooch on doing what I always do!

Original poster
Willowkins · 20/03/2020 20:46

I heard on the radio that more detailed guidance is being prepared for people at high risk. But the truth is, the risk itself hasn't changed. If only there was a way we could dye coronavirus some bright colour so we can see it easily.

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yoloPenguinsEatfish · 20/03/2020 20:47

willow I think of you and yours often... hope you are all keeping safe and coping as best you can Flowers and love.

Original poster
Willowkins · 21/03/2020 20:53

MrW knew that it was time to go bless him. We're all fine if trying to adjust to these strange times. I do think though that it will all seem normal to the YAWs and all the children. Keep safe and sane all of you.

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yoloPenguinsEatfish · 21/03/2020 21:21

I know these are inadequate willow but please accept them with love and all best wishes for you all Flowers

Original poster
Willowkins · 22/03/2020 12:05

Flowers Gin and ❤️ to all of you xx

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Original poster
Willowkins · 23/03/2020 01:21

I just saw this and thought of you (help with supplies for those in the UK) www.gov.uk/coronavirus-extremely-vulnerable

  • yay did my first clicky link Smile
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notapizzaeater · 23/03/2020 10:53

It's a bloody scary time here, if DH gets it he will probably die 😭

Our local village gp is on lockdown as 9 people are suffering symptoms - luckily we have lots of friends who are taking the burden off me for collecting stuff, shopping etc (and I'm a food hoarder so have tons of supplies !)