The calm before the storm

[Willowkins]

I previously posted under the title: I'm not OK - about my lovely DH with stage 4 bowel cancer.

We heard a few weeks ago that DH has refractory disease - basically the chemo is not working. We see the oncologist this week for the results of the latest MRI and hopefully a new plan but it's not looking good.

I am sitting here in the sunshine and the birds are singing but I know we have dark days ahead. I'm trying to stay strong for the family.

Just needed to share with you good folks as can't really talk about this in RL.

They are going as fast as they can.

It's hit me hard today. It's DH birthday and I realised as I wrote his card it might be his last 😭😭😭

Work have been great with me and have told me lots of times if I feel like saying sod it just so it, so I texted my manager this morning and said I didn't feel up to coming in (I work with autistic teens) so could i have a sod it day. We've sat down and talked about loads of stuff, his fears, the future etc and then went for a nice lunch.

DH had a bad scan. Oncologists today to find out what it all means.

@Frikonastick (hugs) from across the water, Ive got my fingers crossed for you x

frik and nota big hugs for you both and your families and I pray you get a good result.

DD2 is currently commuting from home into London (train/tube) for her uni placement year. She is very anxious about coronavirus, and bringing it home with her - as DH immuno compromised. I hadnt really thought about it, apart from pity for the poor sods in China. She says if/when it hits the UK she will not do the commute and work from home - and I totally agree with her actually.

@yolofish - there have been 2 confirmed cases in the UK (although they're being treated in Newcastle, not London). Coronavirus is concerning for anyone, but for someone who is already compromised in any way...

yes fishingpaws and they're not even off the plane that's coming back from Wuhan...

Hope everyone is having a good weekend, we've just watched casualty from last night - very upsetting .......

Duffy died? very sad, I remember Casualty from way back when, loved Duffy and Charlie.

We are trying to watch somethng on some Sky channel - COBRA? but the remote control has gone weird and DH is having a strop and blaming me and the dog!!

We binged cobra last week, was ok - currently binging on The Crown.

@Frikonastick hope you are ok, thinking of you x

nota just managed 2 episodes of COBRA - started really well but then wandered off into the realms of fantasy IMO. got to watch the last 20 mins of the last episode of the Crown as had to switch over for White HOuse Farm on weds.

also thinking of you frik I hope you are as ok as can possibly be.

i come on here and type huge messages and then i delete them

every day

i take huge comfort in all your posts. knowing there are others out there

🤝 Frick, am holding your hand across the water xx

much love frik

Been to hospital this morning - we should hear from Leeds in next week for the operation then results 2 weeks after so a month away before they can look at changing treatment 😞. CT scan booked for 24th feb then results on 5th March. Even with new drugs (if it’s even an option) she thinks 6/9 months - she wouldn't elaborate without them 😭

nota, I don't know what to say, except maybe the new drugs can help for quality of life if not extension.

thinking of you frik.

Thank you @notapizzaeater and @yolofish, I’m so sorry nota, I feel for you and am thinking of you xxx

Work (I work in a school with the ASC kids)have sent me home and don't want to see me until I know one way or they other ! Told me to enjoy the time .....

The op to get the sample is booked for 25th feb so 2 weeks from then.

nota I'm not sure 'enjoy the time' is perhaps the right phrase! I hope it reduces your stress levels, gives you a chance to rest at least. So you're looking at end of the 1st week of March, ie 4 weeks? I will hold you both, and frik in my heart.

@yolofish we will get results of CT on 5th which will just tell us how much it's grown. The posh biopsy on the 25th will be a two week wait again 😭

oh babe. That is so tough, I really really feel for you. I know it sounds trite, but can you and DH do something nice or perhaps at least something normal over the next few weeks? xx

We've got center parcs half term week and next week (he works from home ) we're going to go out and do lunch / breakfast etc

@notapizzaeater directed me here. I haven't read all the thread, and I'm not even sure if I "belong" but I'm placemarking so I don't forget!

Hi. DH has a brain tumour. It was removed in 2014. Returned in 2018. A year of chemo and radio. Currently on a break from treatment but latest MRI results are on Thursday. We don't know what "stage" because they can't do a biopsy, it's too deep in his brain. It was classed as stage 2 in 2014. But it's since grown, deeper and diffuse. And because it is a brain tumour it doesn't really matter if it's malignant or not.

He told me yesteday that he thinks they'll say it's grown since we stopped chemo in November. I can't really argue. He's having more epilepsy /seizure behaviour and he's sleeping loads.

Scanxiety levels are high.

Welcome,

This is the party none of us want to be at 😭

My hubby has an appointment in Wednesday to discuss a navigational biopsy as local (large) hospital can’t do it, then a scan on 24th. He’s got stage 4 lung cancer and best case scenario is currently 6/9 months. It’s really hard as he looks and is perfectly fine. It had spread to his brain just before Xmas - 6 of the little buggers and 4 big ones but gamma knife finishing on 23rd December should have sorted them (next scan for that is March)

hi @teddyneedsawash, theres always room on our bench for another fellow traveler

@notapizzaeater, its the weird juxtaposition isnt it