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LGBT parents

This board is primarily for those whose children have LGBTQ+ parents to share their personal experiences and advice.

Lesbians and STDs?

8 replies

worrieda · 22/01/2009 10:29

Hi there, a namechanger here.

Bit of background: last Christmas (lalala) I split up with my ex-gf because she'd developed feelings for a woman she worked with. They had a brief thing for a couple of months before the other woman went 'cold' on her and the fling fizzled out. We got back together in the summer, but split up again a few weeks ago when ex found out the reason ow had gone cold on her last year and obviously decided she was still in with a chance. Lovely.

Anyway, it turns out that during the time they were having their fling, the ow was supposedly raped, which is why she went cold on ex. To be honest I have very little sympathy (and I'm not even sure if it's true because it seems ow is a bit of a nutjob anyway). But assuming it DID happen, and ex did sleep with her very soon afterwards how likely is it that ex would've picked something up and passed it to me?

I don't know the details of the alledged rape but I assume it would be a man. I understand that generally the more serious STDs can't be passed through lesbian sex, but I basically want to know:

a) How likely it would be that there was still semen present in ow when she and ex had sex in the days after the rape?

b) Is it possible to pass STDs through blood/fluid contact, or genital-to-genital contact between two women? (Aside from the obvious warts and thrush, which I'd be aware of).

c) If yes to either of the above, which STDs would we be talking about?

If it would be a waste of time for me to get tested I'd rather not go through the stress and worry, but if there is a chance I'd like to know.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Disenchanted3 · 22/01/2009 10:35

the ow was supposedly raped, which is why she went cold on ex. To be honest I have very little sympathy

....

you sound like a lovely person,

Simplysally · 22/01/2009 10:38

In the time it took you to post this, you could have rang the STI clinic and booked an appt.

fryalot · 22/01/2009 10:38

disenchanted - I think the OP was saying that she didn't believe that the rape had happened, not that she didn't care that she was raped.

To the op - I have no idea but I wouldn't have thought it was likely that your ex would have picked anything up, but if you are worried, you could got and get yourself tested just to rule anything out.

worrieda · 22/01/2009 10:39

I have never met the ow and only know her through her shenanigans with the ex. If I did know her it would probably be different. Sorry if that sounds horrible, but I have to look out for myself as evidently no other f*cker will, and that doesn't include getting emotionally involved in ow's alledged rape.

OP posts:
worrieda · 22/01/2009 10:50

OK, I'll wait til I get home from work and call the clinic. (Maybe I'll call Interflora and get some flowers sent over to the ow while I'm at it too. It's obviously my duty).

I thought I'd post on here as I've seen MN give the most wonderful, intelligent, thoughtful, practical support and advice in the past. And I'm at work so I can hardly go ringing up clinics in earshot of all and sundry, hence the interweb approach.

OP posts:
worrieda · 22/01/2009 10:56

I'm sorry if I've offended anybody, I do have sympathy for rape victims, I honestly do. I didn't mean to sound as awful as I did. I'm just a bit touchy and angry that I've only just found this out now, more than a year after it happened, and worried that I've potentially been exposed for much of the year.

OP posts:
TotalChaos · 22/01/2009 11:03

no experience, but this website may be useful

depts.washington.edu/wswstd/

hester · 22/01/2009 21:21

OK, my understanding is that it is possible to get an STD through lesbian sex (was told that by a doctor at an, um, STD clinic I attended). But it's less easy and less common. I think it comes down to this: would it put your mind at rest to get checked out and given the all-clear? If so, go for it.

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