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LGBT parents

This board is primarily for those whose children have LGBTQ+ parents to share their personal experiences and advice.

How can I help my tween come to terms with her girl crush

2 replies

Bloodywingingit · 13/06/2024 11:25

My 12 year old started struggling to eat around a month ago- started to feel sick when she was eating. I recognised this as possible anxiety- I’m the same. Do took her aside and asked if anything was wrong- she broke down in tears, telling me she thought she was gay.
thought I’d handled it well- we love her no matter what, it’s ok to have crushes etc reassured her that having crushes on either sex is normal and a part of sussing out herself. If she’s gay, straight or whatever- we really don’t care, as long as she is happy.
since then, still not eating well, crying a lot and generally looking like the weight of the world is on her shoulders. She told me that she has a crush in a girl at one of her clubs- again- told her it’s normal, it doesn’t matter who she loves, as long as she’s happy etc.
I can’t bear seeing her so upset- she tells me she’s confused, and I understand- gosh, we’ve all been there. I’ve reassured her that she will start to figure out what she wants, and how she feels.
she look so desperately sad- how can I support her? I miss my happy, funny girl

OP posts:
SarahAndQuack · 14/06/2024 09:46

I think you're doing everything right. Your poor girl - it's such a rough age. It's not possible anyone at her club/at school has been making her feel bad, is it?

FatmanandKnobbin · 14/06/2024 09:52

With my dd I just started making sure she had plenty of access to books with gay characters, films, programmes etc, when she started her music lessons I specifically chose a teacher who is a lesbian.

Buying books, starting lessons, watching TV etc is all totally normal, but making sure she saw herself represented has been instrumental in helping her gain confidence in herself.

I would also make sure she is seeking help for her anxiety, is there anything she can access through school?

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