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This board is primarily for parents of LGBTQ+ children to share personal experiences and advice. Others are welcome to post but please be respectful that this is a supportive space.

A perspective on trans women — defining what it means to be a woman

12 replies

Inamuddle36 · 21/04/2023 11:43

I read a news story about a person named Dylan Mulvaney who documented transition over TikTok on a series titled “365 days of being a girl”. Intrigued by the photos of a perfectly sculpted/coiffed “woman”, I looked for the series on TikTok (first time on the app). There are many aspects of the series I find disturbing, especially as I assume many of the millions of “likes” are impressionable teens.
Two particular concerns:
(1) the beauty of Dylan today is due entirely to “feminisation surgery” which transformed the face into an idealised expression of what a “female” face should look like, at a cost that most people could never afford
(2) Day 1 of “being a girl” has the following stereotypical text: “Day 1 of being a girl and I have already cried three times; I wrote a scathing email that I did not send; I ordered dresses on line that I couldn’t afford; and then, uh, when someone asked how I was I said “I’m fine!” when I wasn’t fine. Yeah. How did I do ladies?! Good? Girl power!” All while dressed in a bright pink jumper, in a room with floral wallpaper, while applying lip gloss.

what I see is a very disturbed person, with a strongly binary, stereotypical view of gender and gender expression, who has found a way to exagerarte and monetise these views (and thus fund ever more extravagant “transition”) — and with a platform that can influence our children in potentially dangerous ways.
if I could turn the clock back, I would do everything possible to shield my children from social media — or at least sit with them to watch similar “feeds” so we could discuss what they were seeing. Too many parents (myself included) have lived completely in the dark about what are children are consuming on-line.

OP posts:
GreyTS · 21/04/2023 11:48

Disturbing isn't it? I find it so hard to articulate exactly what bothers me so much but it just seems like there's a complete devaluation of women and womanhood. Reducing us to our least important parts, all cosmetic of course, still a man in a dress, and men are more than welcome to join us in these cosmetic pursuits, absolutely doesn't make them any kind of woman

MichelleScarn · 21/04/2023 11:50

Awaiting the 'you're just jealous Dylan is a better woman than you can EVER be' shite that always gets trotted out!

Chewmeric · 21/04/2023 12:00

It is commonly thought that Dylan Mulvaney is grifting. As well as the surgery his looks are also down to filters. I've seen a photo where his skin was nothing like how it normally appears.

I sometimes veer towards pitying him but then remember all that he's doing is intentional for his own gains, he's not helping anybody with what he does.

I see your Dylan Mulvaney, OP, and raise you Jeffrey Marsh. Everybody needs to be aware of him.

Inamuddle36 · 21/04/2023 12:19

Ah. I see I am behind the times in learning about this person! I really do need to trawl through social media more to immerse myself in the “new world”.

OP posts:
orangeflags · 21/04/2023 12:47

He is this year's Lily Madigan

orangegato · 21/04/2023 12:50

It’s a grotesque caricature of what he thinks women are. Reducing women to irrational behaviour and pink frilly shit. It’s appropriation and it’s disgusting.

TheReverendBeeb · 21/04/2023 12:56

I agree that he is ridiculous and my 16 year old DD has seen lots of his stuff. The only good that comes out of it is that some teenagers are peaked by it. My DD is as GC as I am and we discuss some of his activities. Unfortunately she is still scared of voicing such opinions amongst her peer group in case she gets "cancelled". I am v lucky that she has a relatively wise head on her young shoulders but feel very sad, and bloody angry, that she exists in a society where she has to police her own speech for fear of being ostracized.

Nightmare2022 · 21/04/2023 13:28

orangegato · 21/04/2023 12:50

It’s a grotesque caricature of what he thinks women are. Reducing women to irrational behaviour and pink frilly shit. It’s appropriation and it’s disgusting.

Couldn’t agree with this more. I’m so disappointed to see Nike using Dylan to promote their brand. And India Willoughby feel free to screen shot this and call me a Terf and transphobic.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 21/04/2023 13:31

I like the quote - can’t remember who from - “A woman is someone with female biology and any personality/ character, NOT someone with a feminine personality and any biology!”

Bunnywabbity · 21/04/2023 13:39

I can't believe Kirstie Allsopp has chosen Dylan Mulvaney as the man who is so deserving of support, oppressed minority blah blah. He's an absolute embarrassment

Jackiebrambles · 21/04/2023 13:46

Bunnywabbity · 21/04/2023 13:39

I can't believe Kirstie Allsopp has chosen Dylan Mulvaney as the man who is so deserving of support, oppressed minority blah blah. He's an absolute embarrassment

Kirstie seems to have lost the plot the last couple of days.

whyisitalwayswindy · 21/04/2023 13:51

@SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius that quote sums it up!!

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