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LGBT children

This board is primarily for parents of LGBTQ+ children to share personal experiences and advice. Others are welcome to post but please be respectful that this is a supportive space.

Worried about teenage son

1 reply

ImOutNumbered · 18/02/2021 11:56

This may be long, apologies I advance.
My 15 year old son has recently come out as bisexual. Middle of last year he started hanging out with a new group of friends that don't go to his school, he started changing the way he dresses and was with kids we didn't know (except one of them, a girl who used to come to our house) anyway, he told us that this girl was bi, then a few others in this group were too which then made us wonder what they were all getting up hanging round the park so we tried to reign him in a bit which was all helped with the lockdown situation, fast forward to the middle of Jan and we agreed to let him out to meet up with one person for a walk, this person, was born a female but doesn't identify as a specific gender and wants to be referred to something different than their given name, he told us this when he announced he was bi. He said he was interested in a relationship with this person. We are so grateful that he can come to us and open up but now he's started searching for condoms on the Internet. This concerns us for a number of reasons, they're not actually together, they are currently meeting up to walk round a park because we are in lockdown and not visiting houses so a park is not a safe environment, I think they're both confused about who they are, they're both under age.
Does anyone have any advice on how we can approach this?

OP posts:
Italiangreyhound · 21/02/2021 02:32

@ImOutNumbered

I'm really sorry I don't have any advice but I think it would be fair to have a chat with him about safe sex. Not just about condoms etc, (I mean he knows about that anyway) but as you say a park is not a safe place. If he and she are both under age then this could be a dangerous situation for him especially.

I think the fact he may or may not want to identify as bi is not really relevant in this situation, IMHO.

He is male and the person he is interested in is female so the issues would include both possible under age sex and possible pregnancy.

"I think they're both confused about who they are..." they may well be but I'd just make sure he is safe, not doing anything that could endanger him or this other person.

Lockdown will end soon. I think. And your son will reach 16 and so will this other person, so just try and focus on him getting on with you and sharing relevant stuff and see what the future holds.

Whether he is bi or not will unfold in the future and I think you will not be able to influence this either way (not saying you will try to).

Just for the record my dd is bi and is currently in a relationship with another girl. She has had boyfriends and I did very much worry about the pregnancy aspect and had all those conversations so it is quite understandable you are concerned and especially because he is under age.

I also think it is a bit concerning this other person is not sure of their identity and it is great they have your son as a friend so I hope it will all work out well.

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