Absolute Newbie - DS (12) says he wants to be a girl

[BoccadiLupa]

Need help! Out of nowhere, my 12 year old DS has announced that he might want to be a girl. Of course I have been super supportive and positive, but he says he would like to speak to a counsellor about it - I think that there are various issues: being scared of puberty, being scared of moving to a new school next year. I would have no problem at all if he were to be trans, I just want him to have space to explore the issues which worry him.
I have no idea where to start. Can anyone recommend a good counsellor in London, who deals with tweens and gender questioning issues? Thank you so much in advance.

Has he said why? What does he think being a girl will bring to him that he can't have as a boy?

Steer well clear of Mermaids and GIRES. Have a look at the Transgender Trend website.

Not all counsellors are the same. Many want to go down the affirmation route which is the fastest way to puberty blockers and cross-sex hormones while a smaller group are keener to find out what the underlying causes might be.

Although I have no recommendation, try to get one of the latter type.

Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to reply. I agree that I don't want affirmation of it, I just want him to have space to explore the underlying causes - not that I would mind if he ultimately became a girl. He hasn't given me many reasons for wanting to be a girl other than to say that he wants to grow his hair long (that's been true for years!) and that he doesn't want to become a man.

If anyone does know a good, gentle and non-pushy counsellor then I would love a recommendation.

really sorry to hear you're encountering this, please reach out to us at www.bayswatersupport.org.uk we can suggest therapists who have helped young people work through their distress around this issue.

You need to really get to understand this topic. The way you said he could become a girl is exactly what I said when my son said the same (thankfully he had grown out if it now). It’s not that simple.

Please look at transgender trend. Also watch Stephanie Davies Arai here.
There is currently a court case being brought against the NHS Tavistock clinic for prescribing puberty blockers.