How do gay children cope at school??

[citcatgirl45]

I suspect my son will grow up to be gay. He is 11 and loves dancing drama and anything flamboyant. He has one friend who is a boy (who at 11 is openly gay!!) and all his other friends are girls. However he is very popular and has a very wide social circle - all girls, My brother and 2 uncles are gay and also one of my cousins. He has just started secondary and we tried to find the least male stereotypical school we good as my brother had a shocking time at school. He has settled in brilliantly and the teachers love him as he is such a hard worker and a very jovial soul. However he detests sport and especially football and this week the boys have picked on him in PE because he is rubbish at football!!!! How do gay or less boyish boys survive in school where there is such an onus on having to be macho??? He had a horrible time last week being completely mocked for being "gay" and he is saying he isn't and at 11 he is too young to know anyway.The school he goes to is co-ed and very arts and drama based and there are lots of quirky kids who don't fit the mould but I know they have had bullying problems in the past but the other 2 local schools were no good either as one is single sex and the other is a sports specialist academy. I may be reading too much into it but he has always loved school and I want him to carry on excelling and loving life but feel his less boyish tendancies are going to cause him big problems. Any advice would be greatly appreciated??

I wouldn't suggest a single sex school, as boys can be particularly cruel to gay kids. He'll be fine, he'll find a group of friends wherever he goes, sounds like a fabulous DS to me!

I wouldn't go for a single-sex school. As @crazyhat said, they are even more horrible to the gay kids there.

If anything, you should speak to him and the school regarding the bullying.

He will come across homophobia, but any school worth its salt will stamp on that. Ours does not tolerate homophobia of any kind. My DD2 is 16 and has been out for 2 years now - she's had the odd remark, but where she's had to report, it has been dealt with sharply.

She's now in 6th form and it's even better - there is an LGBT club, a supportive group of teachers, some of whom are gay and out themselves, and a culture where it is not an issue. Homophobia is called out among the student body and not tolerated; the students who hold those views have learned to keep them to themselves.

DD's bi. She came out to her friends at school almost a year before she told us, and the only homophobia she's ever experienced was from older relatives. There's loads of LGBT people in her year, no homophobia there either. Times have changed since your brother was in school, they'll be fine with it. If anything does happen, though, the school will make sure it stops.