My daughter has dressed as a boy for the last 3 years and spends a lot of time withdrawn in her room. I have been very worried about her, . We saw a paediatrician a few weeks ago about her persistent headaches and he wrote to me suspecting a gender identity tension cause for the headaches.
She has now told me for the first time that she would go beyond a tomboy and grow up as a boy, she wants to stop her breasts growing, change her name and switch at school to boys PE & boys uniform. Also she is attracted to girls.
I am finding this difficult as a parent, but happy to support her as best I can. However
- she won't talk to anyone else about it but wants me to influence this on her behalf
- A year ago she was determined to be a vegetarian. That lasted a week.
- I wonder if she is actually a lesbian but has more awareness of transgender (eg. Leelah Alcorn) so is interpreting it that way
- she has recently found a nice group of friends but I have my doubts about how close they would stay if she switched (they all live a long way from school and rely on parents driving / sleepovers to meet up, so it's not simple)
I have booked an appointment with the GP and we have a follow up with the paediatrician in a couple of months. We will see where that course takes us.
I also have a meeting with the Deputy Head in a few days and am wondering what I should ask.
I have so many questions and I don't know anyone in a similar situation. It looks like a scary / lonely journey for us. I'd really welcome thoughts and perspectives on practical things I can do eg. ask the school / GP.