Hey, I'm 19 years old and I don't know if I have come to the right place but I would like some advice from a parents point of view?
I am bisexual and I've known for quite a while. During high school I only dated boys, thinking I could cope if I just ignored that I like girls. I've given up on that and came out to my friends last summer, and they were so accepting. I felt happier than I have in a long time. I started university and didn't feel the need to hide my sexuality, and met my girlfriend.
I'm not out to my mum, but I've been dating my girlfriend since January now. At first I didn't want to tell her because I wasn't sure how long this relationship would last or how serious it would get. and then I guess I just started putting it off?
My girlfriend was living with a relative who found out about her sexuality and has made her move out. This was horrible, I felt so bad because if it wasn't for me this wouldn't have happened. I became anxious. I really didn't want to tell my mum after that, even though I'm sure she would never kick me out. My first year results in my exams were poor because I was so anxious, and I began to see the university counsellor.
My mum knows about my poor grades and the counselling (I have had problems with anxiety during high school) but she doesn't know the reason behind it and she seems a bit concerned about me at times.
I don't know how to tell her? I'm worried she will be mad at me for keeping it from her for so long. It's taken me a long time to sort of come to terms with it and be happy with myself and I don't know how she will take it? I'm not sure why I'm finding it so difficult, I am usually quite open with her about things, I told her when I was having sex with boys and things, why should this be difficult?
I also would not like her telling my dad, as we've never got on much and he makes too many homophobic comments for me to be comfortable with it, but she usually tells him everything. I know I will have to tell him at some point but idk I would feel more comfortable telling my mum first..
What should I say to her? Should I say anything at all or leave it until I have moved away? How do I even begin to start telling her about everything thats been happening? I feel so bad for not letting her know, I love my mum and I don't want her to be upset with me :(