Power of Attorney for Mum in care home - can we live in a home owned by her?

[heidi58]

My father died recently and my mother , who has severe Dementia, lives in a care home which is a six hour round trip from where we live. We have been advised that it would be damaging to try moving her to a home near us so are considering moving closer to her. Moving into my parents home is out of the question as it is on 3 floors and my husband is a wheelchair user. What I am wondering, if anybody knows, is whether we could sell their house, use the money to buy another house suitable to our needs and live in it? The reason I am asking is that there is sufficient money for it never to be needed to fund her care home fees, I am the only child and sole beneficiary of their will and we cannot afford to buy a home ourselves at the moment in that area. I have Power of Attorney for Mum but am not sure what that enables me to do in this respect?
I would be grateful for any advice.

hi if you have power of attourney as i understand it means you have to do what your mum would have done/wanted had she been able to make her own descions. I do not see any reason why you could not sell the house as long as there is deffinately enough money for her home fees for as long as she lives. if not they would make you sell the new house to p ay for the care home fees i would spend a few pounds and double check this with a solicitor and make sure they send you a letter on the advice given otherwise you may have trouble if you get investiagted and you need to prove that the solicitor said you could, as this happened to a friend of mine, her problem was that she ran out of money to apy the home fees after 10 years and obviously did not want to move,

Thanks for replying Kitty. The problem is that Mum isn't able to make any decisions for herself as her Dementia is very severe. The POA you are right states that I have to make decisions considering her feelings and wishes but all I have to go on is that she enjoys and looks forward to our visits and hardly gets to go out unless we take her out.In this instance she would have to live to be as old as Methusala for the funds to run out to pay her home fees as they were very well off in that respect.
I will ask the solicitor - she charges £250 an hour for advice so I was hoping for some help maybe from someone who had experience of the situation!!!

Could you seek advice from another solicitor?

Several practices in our area run free clinics or you could try CAB perhaps.

Aslong as there are sufficient funds to pay for her care then it should not be a problem.. If you have POA you can almost certainly sell the existing house and purchase an alternative property

The POA states for you to make decisions for her as she would have done before she had dementia not NOW. I had a POa for my mum wwho had severe dementia and was in a care home also i kept the house until she died beacause i felt it was part of her and she loved her home and garden and didnt feel it right to sell it for my own gains before she died. but thats just me.

I can empathise with your feelings kittycat but as Mum will never be able to visit or return to her home then leaving it empty would be pointless and achieve nothing whereas selling it and using the money to buy another home which would meet hubby's needs that we could live in and be closeby for her would be a positive and helpful move. I am certain that if she were able to understand then she would feel the same - what is the point of an empty home that nobody can live in? The more I have been able to think about it and as the emotional cloud has lifted I think that I must go with my best instinct and sell the house and then, if circumstances are the same, go ahead and act as I feel she would want and in all our best interests. Thanks for all your advice guys.

My StepF recently sold his mum's house and bought a flat to rent out to supplement the home charges.

Would your mums house stretch to a place for you to live in and a place to rent out?

StepF rightly realised that interest on the capital wouldn't pay for anything, so the flat he bought pays half her fees. If your DMs house is that large, it could perhaps 'kill the 2 birds'....

The decision you are making IS in her best interest, you need not feel guilty.

Hi you need to act in your mothers' best interest, selling the house and buying something else should be ok, any left over money should be invested

no expert but that is how i understand it