Fathers in prison and their rights - can I have parental responsibility terminated?

[vikkiville]

I am new to mumsnet and need some urgent advice. Sorry in advance for the length.

My son's dad is awaiting to stand trial for a serious crime and if found guilty (highly likely) he will receive between 6 and 10 years - possibly more. My son could be a teenager (currently 3) when he is released and I am absolutely adamant that my son will never ever see the inside of a prison - I will not allow it.

His father and I have been separated for some time and he has not provided any financial support. When we were together it was a very volatile relationship and I endured years of psychological and verbal abuse. Occasionally physical abuse, but more often than not I fought back. I am actually partially deaf in one ear because of it.

I walked away and took with me a mountain of debt that he ran up in my name and I will be paying this off for 10 years. I am managing, just about. Due to his suspected crime the house that we shared is on restraint meaning it cannot be sold, I currently rent it out to pay the mortgage as I moved areas to get away from him and his family.

My son loves seeing his father, he gets spoilt rotten. I have allowed him to visit his father as long as he was supervised by his grandmother (exes mum). However, on the last visit this didn't happen, I was lied to and my ex took him to stay elsewhere - somewhere I would NEVER have agreed to.

I am worried absolutely sick that if something happens to me my ex will gain full custody of my son. No one in their right mind would consider this a good thing given his history and mental state. I have made a will and appointed guardians, however what I really want is to apply to have parental responsibility removed, especially if he goes to prison.

Will I be able to do this if he is imprisoned?

I would wait till he's found guilty and locked up just incase he becomes threatening. Right now I would cut his contact to daytime only.

I do know some who managed to have something like this done but it was quite awhile ago. You would be best talking to a Solicitor practicing in family law. I imagine it will also depend if he resists or not.

He will resist.

He also has the backing of very wealthy relatives.

Can I be forced to take my son to visit him in prison??

What if something happens to me whilst he is in prison??

If you were married to your son's father you cannot have his PR removed. Sorry.

If you were not married you may be able to get his PR removed but it won't be easy - the courts are not keen on removing PR from the natural father.

On the contact issue, if there is a contact order in place you must continue to comply with it. If you are unhappy with it you should apply for a variation to the order.

Def seek legal advice.

We were never married but he does have PR as he is on the birth certificate.

There is no contact order in place - and it is obviously best that I avoid this. Is that right that if he gets a contact order I will be forced to take my son to visit him in prison???

If he got PR through being on the birth certificate it can be removed but, as I said, it won't be easy.

If there was a contact order and he was then imprisoned that could be good grounds to apply for a variation. In that situation I would recommend talking to a solicitor with family law experience.

In theory PR can be removed but in practice it very rarely is. The presumption generally taken by courts is that even if a parent has serious shortcomings the child has the right to know about their heritage and to see both parents, as long as it is safe.

Usually it's best to accept that contact in some form will happen and support the relationship in the best interests of the child (children who are insecure about their parentage tend to have low self esteem tending to lead to emotional and behavioural problems in later life.)

Residence is another matter altogether. If there is a residence order in your favour the court may order any individual appointed by you to be the child?s guardian in the event of your death. The guardian would then have PR and can be awarded residence. The usual criteria then applies - the welfare of the child is paramount and the welfare check list.

Hi, I'm new to this but need some advice of people who are or have gone through the same thing as me...

So my sons father (we are not together and haven't been for over 1.5 years now) has just begun serving a UK prison sentence of 5 years for rape on a woman. We have a 2 year old son together and my sons father is wanting his son to visit him in prison... I have given this some serious thought and know that I do NOT want my child to be visiting a prison, personally it's no place for a child.
Sons father has been in and out of my babys life whenever it suits him, showed no interest for the past 2 years until about 4 weeks before his trial... and now thinks his baby is his everything...

Does anyone know my legal rights of anyone else but myself taking my son to see his dad in prison without my consent? I.e. Grandparents of their side.

Also he's on the sex offenders register for life, what will happen when he gets out? Will it be supervised contact through a contact centre or what? I am so terrified of what's going to happen and what rights I have. Please reply back to me xx

Thank you,
One anxious and scared mum.

Hi there. You really need to start your question again as a completely new thread. People who read this will reply to the original question from six years ago and not yours.

Hi Vikki I stumbled across your message and whilst I appreciate it’s been awhile I would like to know how things turned out. I would appreciate some guidance in something similar.