financial support for non-resident children

[piepie]

I have recently been unsuccesfull in a custody/residential case the children are to live with their dad as he is self-employed and can provide better care and has a larger property than me. On the other hand I am a single parent of a 14 year old in a two bedroom house we all used to live together. But it appears that dad has the upperhand as he has more financially, eventhough he did not want ot know them before. When the children come to me for contact, bearing in mind I only get benefits for myself and my 14 yearold, I find I am struggling with all three as I cannot take them anywhere. It did not used to be like this before he took them away where can I get help there was no financial assistance drwan up in the court orders and the barrister did not request it, which I think was a mistake on his part. Social services, the solicitors, the gaurdian have not acted in my childrens best interest they clearly miss mum and their other brother and want to come home. It is now out of the family courts I need financial assistance whilst they are with me. I am desparately actively seeking work, as I have always worked I am not a benefits mum, but I am in this situation since I had my youngest 4 years ago now I want a job the recession dont help. PLEASE ADVISE.........

I would not expect to find anything about financial assistance in court orders if the case was just about residence. The bad news I'm afraid is that, as the law stands, the absent parent (you) can be made to pay child maintenance to the parent with whom the children live. The fact that he is better off than you already isn't taken into account.

If you were married to the father and are not yet divorced, you won't be able to get maintenance for the children as they don't live with you but you may be able to get maintenance for yourself as part of the financial settlement. If the divorce has already gone through, check to see if he is supposed to pay you a nominal amount of maintenance (£1 a year is normal). If he is, you can go back to the courts and apply to have that increased to something more sensible.

tHANKS FOR THE RESPONSE PRH47BRIDGE As it goes I was not married to the ex, He was not an active or participating father when I was with him, he clearly did not want to know my children. I went to court for 3 years fighting for them I told the truth all the way, He told so much lies, but he had soc servs on his side. I just dont understand why their welfare has not been taken into account whilst they are on contact with me. Things will be better when I get a job but it just aint happening fast enough. In all fairness, based on my experience I can say the system stinks, My children are so unhappy especially my 9year old he just wants to come home I worry about his state of mind. The judge denied them a guardian. They were so intent on my 14 year old having a CAHMS assmnt that htey overlooked the 9 year olds emotional state. he has not adjusted to the changes well at all...REPLY

I'm really sorry to hear that. I wish there was something I could suggest. Have you tried the CAB?

sorry i didn.t reply back earlier, however thank you for your response I have not been to CAB I will have get advice from somewhere because I have recently attended court for TV license I explained why I ran into arrears and they totally understood. I feel this case is quite unique. Every single person dealing with my case was against me having my children returned My 9 year old told the ind soc worker he wants to come home and why, but he was not listend to now its out of the courts do I accept it or fight it. I really dont want to give up but I have no more steam left. I am not a legal person but I saw so much indescrepancies the case actually became a joke....

I'm sorry to hear you are going through this. However I disagree with phr47bridge. IT might be the usual thing but there are exceptions.

I know of someone who was paying his ex a small amount of child maintenance even when he was the resident parent. If he earns far more than you, he should be helping you at least a bit. However, the amount you can get may need to be decided by court, which will be, as you already know, an expensive process.

So, I'm really sorry to say this, but you just need to keep trying finding that job. Any job will do, with the tax credits you can get for being a single mum to your 14 year old, things will get better.

I don't think that can be right, Mongolia. Are you sure this wasn't spousal maintenance?

The Child Support Act 1991 works entirely on the basis that payment is from the absent parent to the parent with care. The courts may order something different but in most cases they leave child maintenance for the CSA and it would be extremely unusual for the court to order the parent with care to pay child maintenance to the absent parent. If the court does order something different it can be overturned by the CSA after 12 months. The CSA only ever order the absent parent to pay maintenance.

So pretty much the only ways the parent with care can pay the absent parent maintenance without the CSA interfering are if they do so voluntarily or if they are paying spousal maintenance.

Piepie - It is difficult to comment on the limited information you can post here. I would recommend speaking to the CSA. If you didn't have legal representation it would be a good idea to consult a solicitor who specialises in family law. Many will give you a 30 minute consultation free of charge.

Yes I am. The way it worked was that she would pay him, lets say, for illustration purposes, £100, and he had to pay her £30. The problem was she didn't take the payments seriously and interrupted maintenance often, while him, the resident parent, who was in a lower income continued to pay.

It took the court to intervene to stop this ridiculous situation which I think was bad in this case, but considering how piepie is struggling, and that such struggle may end up restricting the contact with her own children, perhaps there is something that could be done.

I have also noted in the Wikivorce maintenance calculator that child maintenance payment is also calculated for both parents to pay. And have also seen it in other divorce books but can't seem to find it in my notes right now.

Perhaps is a "leftover" from the times before the CSA, it may not be possible to get this through the csa but may still be possible through court.

What is the net income of the father? If the 14 year old was a natural child of the relationship you can claim child support through the CSA. The father can also claim against you for the children living with him and then a balancing payment can be assessed.

Sadly it isn't unheard of that some NRPs struggle financially to maintain contact and there was a case local to me where the NRP survived on 5 tins of baked beans all week just so they could afford to feed the children at the weekend. Both the courts here and in Europe have found the benefits system discriminates against parents who look after children for the minority of the time but government has said administratively it is too complicated to change the system.

Since March 2003 the courts have no jurisdiction to impose an order for child maintenance when the CSA has jurisdiction. See s8 Child Support Act 1991 as amended. The exceptions are top up payments when the non resident parent's income exceeds the CSA capped amount of £2k/week; expenses directly related to education and training for vocation, trade or profession; expenses associated with a child?s disability; or when either parent lives abroad.

As Wikivorce keep saying, their calculator is only a very rough guide and should not be relied on. If you look at the results again you will see that they don't mention child maintenance at all. Childcare is mentioned as part of the calculation but the figure they come up with is described as "maintenance". It isn't at all clear whether they are talking about spousal maintenance, child maintenance or a combination of the two. I suspect it is intended to be the latter.

In the UK the courts generally avoid awarding child maintenance, leaving that to the CSA, the exception being where the parents agree maintenance between them. Even where the parents have agreed, the courts check it is reasonable and legal.

The arrangement you describe sounds very strange.

Can I refer you to this page which is a clear statement of the law as it currently stands.

STIDW has put it better than I have. If the parents agree child maintenance between them the court will confirm that. However, if the parents cannot agree then the court cannot make an order for child maintenance (apart from extras on top of the CSA figure). It is then up to the CSA who ALWAYS make the non resident parent pay.

Hi
just wanted to say you're not the Mum who'se been screwed in the courts by a lying, clever, fiancially dominant ex. My two oldest live with their father who has consistentlty messed up thier contact with me....used to be quite suicidal but surprising how it starts to feel like a bereavement and then eventually you deal with it. Re the money - you can have all the child benefit paid to you with their father's permission - benefit office told me it is quite common. My ex would rather see us all starve so I don't get it but you might at least until you are in work? - best of luck with it all.