Divorce - worried about being homeless

[Marshmallow2024]

Going through a divorce. We have a joint mortgage on a house with £75k equity. My husband has been paying the mortgage since we moved house two years ago because he is the higher earner. I cover the bills, food, household expenses, and child-related costs.

He has pulled the children out of private school, which he had been paying for, so that he can afford to stay in the family home and renovate it. His mortgage adviser has told him he can have the mortgage in his sole name because he has evidence of paying it himself, alongside access to large loans and financial assurances from family members.

He has already paid over £5k in legal fees and has been told he would not need to buy me out because he can show he has covered the mortgage costs for the past few years. He says that, if anything, I owe him money. He also said he might be able to help me with a deposit on rented accommodation.

I’m worried I’m going to end up homeless, without a house in my name. I have had my name on a mortgage for 16 years and have two primary-school-aged children whom I will need to house 50% of the time. They are also having to change schools.

I paid for two hours of legal advice only to be told that I was in a financially difficult situation.

My husband hates me — understatement of the year — and is only thinking of himself.

What should I do?

Get legal advice. He is talking bollocks. You are entitled to to at least 50% of all assets including his pension

Your legal advice said you weren’t entitled to any of the equity? That sounds not right to me

Have you been married for 16 years? If so, this will be classed as a long term marriage and you would be entitled to at least 50% of any equity in the house. You would also be entitled to a percentage of his pension, and any savings you both have.

You need to get yourself a good lawyer which will be expensive but will be worth it.

If you have lived in that house for 16 years why do you think there is only 75k equity in it? What about the 16 years worth of payments?

Your husband is fooling you - do not move out of that house - you are entitled to at least half of the assets you own and you are entitled to be given what you need in order to adequately house yourself and your children if the assets allow for that

Do not listen to him, if anything you could be allowed to remain in the home and he will need to move

But first can you explain why there is so little equity in the property?

Likewise you maybe entitled to some of his pension plus he needs to pay you maintenance- don’t let him assume he will take your kids full time either!

You can’t believe anything he tells you. It might be true it might not.

if you have been married for 16 years and have two children this will be considered a long marriage and the starting point would be 50:50.

the major assets in any divorce are usually pensions and the house. What is the pension situation?

pulling them out of private school is probably sensible although I can imagine the kids don’t like the change.

I don't believe that is the advice he has been given. He is trying to.pull the wool over your eyes and get you to agree to his terms. You need some good legal advice from someone who knows what they're doing. It sounds as if you have been financially abused in this marriage. Remember, even if you had been a SAHM, you would have been entitled to a 50:50 share of the house and his pension.

Just put what you’ve written here into ChatGPT and it’ll tell you he’s talking absolute bollocks.

I wouldn't trust ChatGPT for legal advice. Also, those saying you are entitled to 50% or more of the house and his pension are guessing. The starting point for a financial settlement is a 50/50 split, but there are various factors that could result in you ending up with more or less than 50%. No-one can say exactly what you should get without a lot more information. However, the courts will certainly want to see that you have a roof over your head. You need proper legal advice.

Your legal advice sounds a bit shit. Get proper advice and prepare to hear plenty more lies from him.

The equity is so low as we paid above market value for the property when we bought it 2 years ago (had lived in other properties before).

He hardly has a pension but I have a substantial one that he wants half of.

If I get 50% of everything - that still leaves me with £38k from the house to use to get myself a house while he has a huge house to live in. Although he will have the pressure of covering the costs - which should be no problem without school fees.

In such a rubbish situation!

Legal advice is wrong. I have a fruend who has just divorced, exh paid for nothing but got 50%.

He may have a huge house but he’d still have the same equity as you, so just a huge mortgage! Sounds like he’s trying to swindle his way out of things. Marriage brings shared assets, that’s the house equity as well as your pension. However if he’s telling long tales about your lack of rights to equity, there may also be pensions or savings that he’s not being honest about

How much is your pension compared to his?

Have you seen for yourself what the equity is or has he told you? If the latter make sure you check information from your mortgage provider. I would get different legal advice. How old are the children?

OP says she has a substantial pension whereas he has hardly any. Her legal advice may have been based on her keeping all of her pension, which would result in her getting less of other assets. Also, if she has more earning potential than her husband, that may reduce her share of the assets. There isn't enough information here to say how much she would get in divorce, and there certainly isn't enough to say definitively that her legal advice was wrong.

Get yourself a better lawyer.