How do executors tell beneficiaries what they are due under a will?

[PinkCatCushion]

Anyone here been an Executor?
How is it best to tell people what they are getting from the deceased’s estate?
Do you ring them individually?
Do you let them know what others are getting too?
Did you send everyone a copy of the Will?

The Will I am an executor for has lots of people getting small amounts each, some of whom may be expecting a bit more than they are actually going to get, so there may be some awkward conversations.

I’m wondering if it might be easier to just email everyone a copy of the will to look at.

It’s a distant relative who has died.

How is it best to tell people what they are getting from the deceased’s estate?

However you like. Sorry, I know that isn't much of a real answer.

Do you ring them individually?

If you know them well enough to call them then, yes, that is fine. You might also want to follow up with an email or letter so that they have something in writing as well.

Do you let them know what others are getting too?

I would suggest, only if they specifically ask. Not everyone is interested.

For example, saying out of the blue:
"Well, auntie Mabel, grandmother left you £5,000 but, did you know, she left auntie Doris £8,000!"

Might not go down too well. Auntie Mabel may be perfectly happy with her £5,000.

But you must remember that any will becomes public after probate has been granted. So anybody can download a copy of the will from the government website, however there is a charge of about £16.

Did you send everyone a copy of the Will?

Again, only if they asked for it. Not everyone is interested.

"...lots of people getting small amounts each"

One thing I will say though, is that if there are beneficiaries that you do not know personally then I would ask them to provide you with some sort of ID just to prove that they are actually who they claim to be.

It's obviously no problem if beneficiaries are all family or other people that you know well. You know who they are.

But if any gifts have been left to people who you don't really know then it would be best to ask them to show you some sort of ID.

The reason for this is that if a gift is left to John Smith and you then give the gift to the wrong John Smith, or just some random person claiming to be John Smith, then that will cause problems for you.

If the real John Smith then turns up and you have given his money to somebody else then you will be personally responsible and will need to pay the real John Smith yourself.

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It can also be an issue if one of the people has gone missing. For example, if nobody has seen long-lost cousin Shaun for many years and he has been left some money. You can't just forget about him. You, as executor, will have to make all reasonable efforts to search for him. Any costs connected with the search will be paid for by the estate of the deceased.

Being an executor is a real responsibility.

In your shoes, I'd email everyone OP (with a read receipt) unless they don't have email (my MIL, for example) then I'd write. If they have questions, let them ring you. You also have a written record of everything in a way that is very easily organised.

Definitely do not ignore @Another2Cats 's advice on seeing the ID of anyone you don't know.

I'd also confirm bank account details too. I wouldn't be paying anything into an account which doesn't have the name of the beneficiary on it.

Well done taking this on, it can be a lot of work.

Letter or email. They can ask to see the will, but they don’t have to. I got the solicitor to do it but they don’t have to be told anything until you need their bank details! Yes, you or solicitor need to make an effort to find someone!

My mother had my sister's husband and my ex husband as her executors. They didn't tell us anything. It was all done by the solicitor.

You don't have to employ a solicitor. It sounds like the OP is doing it all herself, which is totally fine if she feels comfortable.

Your mother had her daughters' husbands as her executors, but not her daughters themselves? What?

No of course you don’t need a solicitor but they do the grunt work and the estate pays. It’s often not a huge amount. Executor doesn’t really have to do much except approve things. You don’t get kudos or brownie points for diy and taking it all on.

once we had finalised the estate, we wrote to everyone individually stating they were a beneficiary and the amount they were left . Didn’t send a copy of a will or probate .

Yes. Exactly.
We knew nothing about it. She just said she'd made a will with solicitor X. She told them not to say they were the executors. When we asked her she told us it was none of our business.

Write or email to each beneficiary in person, to keep track of written stuff. No need to tell anyone what other beneficiaries are getting, which could lead to conversations you don't want to be involved in, especially on the phone. If beneficiaries want to know who got what they can get a copy of the will themselves after probate.

takes a lot of the emotion out of decisions that may need to be made

I sent an individual email to each beneficiary - there was no will, so it was a straightforward split between siblings, once we'd deducted inheritance tax etc.

Keep watertight records of all the details in case of any queries, and don't take it personally if anyone moans. Keep it all very business-like.

@chipsandpeas in my mother's case it was probably done either out of spite or because she was of the old fashioned opinion that only men should deal with stuff like that.

If anyone asks for the will don’t give them the original… I was executor of a will and the family weren’t in it… they wanted the will! I told them they could have a copy but not the original.

In a family where there was interpersonal conflict (not about the will), I think my SIL's solution worked well.

She did it by email with a copy of the will attached and breaking down the calculations for everyone involved by how the will listed it so it was all transparent and matter of fact.

I think it helped that my in-laws wills were fairly simple, but I think when you have people who were still raw and pretty unhappy with each other over how their parents last couple of years had gone (they died fairly close to each other) along with other conflicts, having it all laid out like that probably was the best way to ease what could have been a tense situation.

You should really wait until probate has been granted, as until that point you can't be 100% sure that the Will you have is the last one the testator made.

It would be very embarrassing to tell someone they'd inherited £10k only to have to tell them later that it was a mistake.

This is surprisingly common and my lip curls every time I see it.

Thank you for all the advice, they were really helpful.
I’ve read all the replies and decided to email everyone individually to tell them what they are getting (I have everyone’s details). I will only give them a copy of the will if they ask.
I think emailing them will be best as it removes the emotions and gives both them and me a chance to consider what to say before responding.
At the end of the day it’s not my decision how much people are getting; I’m just following my relative’s wishes. If anyone gets upset I’m just going to keep telling them that.

People have been asking now the funeral is over. I’m confident the Will I have is the correct one, but it’s a good idea to mention about probate.
People have been gifted a percentage of the estate rather than an actual amount so I’m not telling them how much money they are getting.

@PinkCatCushion You should not mention an amount. The will sensibly mentions % so stick to that. You don’t need to keep beneficiaries updated with every twist and turn on the journey to probate. The estate will presumably have expenses and not sure if you mentioned savings and property and any other matters relating to money. However you won’t be sure of sums until several weeks from now or even months. After probate it’s still going to take some time to settle all the finance so you can confidently distribute the estate. If no property, it’s probably quicker.