Potential issues with leaving an estate directly to biological grandchildren?

[ChorltonCreamery]

I am driving a neighbour to a solicitor’s appointment next week.

I refused to attend the appointment with her but will sit in the reception while she is in but I have been talking to her about her options though,

She has three children:

One son is divorced and remarried with stepchildren.
One son has a stepchild who has been adopted by him.
One daughter married for nearly three decades.
They all have children.

She wishes to bypass her sons and as a result feels she has to bypass her daughter.

She wants her biological grandchildren to inherit .

She wants to divide assets into thirds so each set of biological grandchildren share a third. So the grandchild who has one sibling would inherit more than the grandchild with two or three siblings.

Are there potential issues with this?

Would the former stepchild who was adopted have any grounds to challenge if the grandchildren are named in the will?

Would her own son be able to challenge on his behalf.

Two of the grandchildren are not yet 18.

She thinks that one son could potentially have more children.

Can anybody think of anything else that needs to be talked about or any potential issues?

I think saying 'divided among grandchildren' could give rise to debates about who is counted as a grandchild.

My will specifies what a grandchild is. "Biological or legally adopted children of my children (but excluding foster or step children)."

That’s a good alternative way of looking at it.

I see a poster thinks this is a good way of looking at it - I’ll just add the other side that it’s more than likely the older adopted child will have had a much, much more traumatic time than the one that got a new home/parents as a baby.

It’s incredibly unlikely (read probably 0 chance) too that their bio family are leaving good inheritances to them - it just is. Plus if their family died intestate then legally they get nothing - if - a big if - the bio family wanted to pass anything on then they’d have to be very precise about it - just saying my daughter would not suffice, as legally they just aren’t any more.

I can’t really accept it’s ever ok to exclude an adopted grandchild - even if they get stuff elsewhere - as these are the grandkids it’s likely all will get varying amounts anyway with the different families involved.

You can't say that an adopted child has zero chance of inheriting from bio family - not when that child was a stepchild at least. They still live with their mum - what if granny on mum's side is leaving them a big inheritance? Bio dad might be a complete waste of space as a father, but his parents might be lovely and desperately upset about it all. And also planning to leave money to this child. We don't know.
Maybe there's trauma or maybe it's just that bio dad has never been on the scene, step dad has been a better father and they just wanted to make it official. There are so many variables and so it feels wrong to outright condemn a woman for making a choice of what to do with her money.

Yes this. Or bio mum/Dad is deceased and left the child money through life insurance or pension or death in service benefit or something. This isn't that uncommon a scenario, it's a lot lot easier for a step parent to adopt a child if their other parent is deceased than if the other parent is around but useless. And in the parent had died scenario there could of course be very involved grandparents and wider family on the deceased parents side as well. The adopted child could end up substantially better off financially than their step siblings in this scenario, of course of course they've lost a parent so no-one would then say they're lucky or anything like it, but you can understand why the grandparents on the adoptive side might feel they want to even things up somewhat in their own wills...

I totally get that people are leaping to the defence of adopted children but I think there is a difference between 'normal' adoption and 'step' adoption, both are valid of course and I think I personally would treat an adopted step grandchild the same as biological in my will but I think some of the accusations in this thread are a bit uncalled for without knowing the full circumstances...

I think I've been a huge disappoint to my in-laws. Still married to their son, no illegitimate kids. The future they planned for me - inheriting their money, divorcing their son, getting half of a third of their suburban house minus fees and bequests. Then I think the plan was for me to marry in my 50s a man with his own children but not update my will, then promptly die at which point said presumably unpleasant man can leave it all to his own kids.

I've known them 30 years and raised their grand kids, hosted big family events for all the in-laws but yes, they absolutely think that I'm just waiting for them to pop their clogs before running off with my HRT never looking backwards with 100k to leave to the imaginary children of my imaginary second husband.

What’ a way to create family strife and upset.

They’ve made you work hard for this potential inheritance at least ha!

You may also be the reason they hold onto life till they’re 122 too lol.

I find all this so distasteful tbh - if cash is all you’re worth, and how you value yourself, then it’s a poor lookout.

Then again I’m fortunate enough not to be either inheriting or leaving millions so maybe I’d be more worried too - I really hope I wouldn’t be - at least I can be glad I’m not rich on this thread.

I think as they have got older my in-laws have definitely got more ' blood' orientated. Partly it's a reaction to BIL splitting from the mother of his children, all partners, no matter how long standing are a potential flight risk.
It's such a shame not the family I thought I was marrying into, more just my husband's relatives rather than one big family working together.

And they are so going to live for ever. FIL is currently fuming he can't have a super specialist knee op that is generally used for Olympic athletes.

Families can be so weird - I’m sure mine is too lol.

I think maybe as you age blood/genes/passing on ‘you’ becomes more and more important- I know my Dad dif a family tree in retirement- quite an impressive one!

Haha - my ma wanted the best, most immediate treatments whether only suitable for 50 or 20 year olds or not - at 90 - she wanted to live forever for sure - she gave it a good shot tbf living on her ‘spirit’ one of her friends said - for several years - god bless her.

Its hard for you though - hope you can just let it slide over you - for you, not them - they may be old but they are also very rude!

This will cause mayhem all round. Entirely her decision but very unwise in my opinion.