International divorce - children relocation

[appleandcarrot]

I am currently going through a divorce with my British husband, and we have two British children together. I am not a British citizen and currently hold a spouse visa, but I plan to apply for a family visa as the parent of British children. My soon-to-be ex-husband is living abroad with his girlfriend.
He initiated the divorce and has made a financial offer that I believe is significantly inadequate. My solicitor is currently reviewing and responding to this.
If he continues to make unreasonable offers and fails to meet our legal and financial needs, I would like to understand my options. Specifically, would I be able to relocate to my home country with my children, given that they hold dual nationality?
Can the UK family court require me to remain in the UK with the children, even though their father is living overseas and not providing sufficient financial support? To be honest, I’m not very familiar with family law in the UK, particularly when it comes to what level of financial maintenance I should reasonably expect for myself and my children. However, based on what I’ve seen so far, the offer seems very low compared to his income, and my solicitor has also indicated that I am likely to fall short financially.
My concern is that living in London is extremely expensive, and I’m struggling to understand why I should remain here without my husband, especially as I’m not originally from the UK. I also don’t feel comfortable relocating to a cheaper area within the UK, as I don’t have a support network here. Ideally, I would prefer to return to my home country where I have family support.
In these circumstances, I would like to understand under what conditions the family court might refuse permission for me to relocate with my children. I am worried about staying in the UK, exhausting my savings, and potentially facing financial hardship, particularly as my husband has already moved on and is living abroad with his new partner.
Could you also advise on the proper legal process I would need to follow if I wanted to pursue relocation?

I won’t make any decisions based on what I hear on here for sure. Just want to get some ideas. I am sure I will need proper legal advice but hope it doesn’t come to that point.

Can I ask, if your husband isn't living in the UK, do you know for a fact he would oppose the move? And if so why? How often does he see the children at the moment?

I guess he won’t like it because he would thinks he won’t have more control over me and my children when they are in my country. He comes and see the children on holidays and I don’t mind it of course he should come and see them wherever we are.

What is the home country? I have friends in a similar situation and a big factor is the dh wanting the kids to be British and brought up with a British education and British opportunities. Even though he too doesn't spend much time in the UK, he very much wants his dc to. The home country is a huge factor in their case as it's not particularly desirable to live.

Is this contributing factor for your dh do you think? If so, his current location might be a moot point to him granting permission.

How can it be abduction (if you have permission from the other parent) to take your own children to live in another country?!

I guess in my case he could argue the same. I don’t want to disclose too much about my details so excuse me please. We do have British schools/ international schools but it’s expensive in my home country. My children are British but why can’t I argue my side of story? They hold dual citizenship and I don’t think it’s wrong for me to have my children to have an opportunity to live in my country especially when dad is moved abroad with new partner? Can you tell me more about what’s the outcome of your friend situation please?

Read the post again. @Lemonjuicegums says it would be abduction if OP does NOT have permission from her husband. This is correct. To move legally, OP needs her husband's consent or a court order allowing the move.

She is still in the UK, has a lawyer and going through the court system as permission was not granted by her dh.

Of course you can argue your side of the story. The question is what the courts will decide is in your children's best interests. No-one can answer that on the information you have given.

As far as I can see from her posts (unless I've missed something), OP hasn't actually asked her STBXH if she can take her children to live in her home country. What is going through the courts at the moment is the financial settlement, not the arrangements for the children.

I am no lawyer and have no insight into how family law works. Having said that, whilst I know courts can theoretically stop your children from leaving, they cannot stop YOU from leaving. Courts work in the interest of the children. I simply don’t believe any court, when told you are leaving, will think ‘oh yes it is definitely in the children’s best interests to place them in care or agree to send them to a father they haven’t lived with for xxx months to a different country they don’t know and are not nationals of, rather than allow them to leave with the only primary carer they have ever known’.
Having said that you might want to wait around until the finances are settled as here in London your needs are great, particularly if you have NRPF and are could be entitled to a higher share of the marital ‘pie’ than if you are housed by your family in a low cost country.

I will talk to my solicitor and highlight this concerns. I don’t think my children’s dad wants to see court ordering me to go back to my home country with children. My concern is that there is no point for me to stay in UK without him and do the children making myself fall into destitution.

You do need your lawyer to advise you. If you want people to try and help you, you’d need to disclose:

both your salaries
assets - house equity, cars, pensions
debts
length of marriage
what his current offer is
ages of children
both your ages

that will help establishing a fair division of assets.

As for immigration, that is a minefield and you will need to see an expert so as you understand your rights. Your country of residence will play a part too - there is a big difference between Iran and Italy for example.

im not British born but am British and can say it will be in your benefit to obtain British citizenship first and then consider relocating. With British children it will ensure you have more options in the future.

A family court will in all likelihood side with what is best for the children and as they are British I'm not sure moving them abroad out of this jurisdiction would be seen as being in their best interests. That's why it's relevant where you intend to move to.

I just read your other thread. Start by fighting for the best financial settlement you can get - as this will inform you whether you want to/will be able to afford to stay in London or not.
High earning men often offer low financial settlements to their ex-wives - mine did. It doesn't mean you have to accept it. My ex also now works outside the UK, but was still made to abide by the UK divorce rules - he had to fly back for our FDR hearing.
We managed to agree a financial split at a private FDR hearing - and although these are not legally binding, the Judge indicated a court would award me far more than he was offering, and that was enough to convince him.
Then, if you decide you don't want to stay in the UK, you can apply to remove the children - firstly by asking his agreement, or vis the courts. I don't think the courts would stop you taking the children back to your home country as long as you can argue it is in their best interests. I think the main argument for not removing the children would be to facilitate contact with the father - but seeing as he is no longer in the UK, that argument would fail.

There is no greater priority than ensuring your children are safe with you. Can you afford not to take legal advice?!

Sorry I appreciate that you also have to feed and house them.

Or just ask husband now. If he says no you know where you stand and take legal advice. If yes and he agrees, you’re sorted.

Explain you will have to play hard ball if stay in U.K. as you need more financial support than you would at home with family.

Worth bearing in mind that his Middle East employment may be shaky given current events. That will influence him in negotiations.

Taking my children out of the UK is not my primary objective. However, the offer my STBXH has made is shockingly low. I have discussed this with my solicitor, and she has been very clear that she will not accept any unreasonable proposals from either side. She has already identified several red flags in his Form E that she intends to challenge and question.

In terms of maintenance, I genuinely do not believe that I am asking for anything unreasonable, and my solicitor agrees with this position. It is a significant responsibility to raise two young children, particularly in a foreign country where I have no family support network and limited state support.

I will continue to push for a fair outcome. However, I also need to consider a Plan B in case the court does not grant my requests. I cannot put myself in a position of financial hardship or destitution in the UK. If it comes to that, I would rather return to my home country and rebuild my life there.

This leads me to a question I have been reflecting on: if the court does not allow me to relocate with my children, what is the expectation for their care? It would not be reasonable to suggest that I leave the UK while my children remain here without me. Their father is currently living in the Middle East with his new partner, and I am originally from South Korea. It seems difficult to understand how it could be argued that remaining in the UK without adequate support is in the children’s best interests.

I also wonder whether the court could order that the children live with their father instead of me, and on what basis such a decision would be made.

Additionally, my STBXH is unwilling to cover the cost of family visa fees, meaning I would need to fund this myself. Given that I do not wish to remain in the UK long-term or raise my children here under these circumstances, it raises the question of whether it is reasonable to expect me to bear that cost.

Op I’m in a minimum wage job and while dh and I are together we’re rocky and I would lose any childcare if we broke up. I am searching like hell for something else. It will be tough for the kids but it just has to be done. You have to look for a higher paying job

Indeed. Probably in my home country.

Why can’t you look for a higher paying job here?

Are the home office aware of your divorce? If not that's also going to cause problems for you down the road. You really need to speak to an immigration solicitor asap and also get some firm advice on the kids. I would suggest that your visa and the kids need to take priority over the financials for the min so that you know exactly where you stand.

Many reasons. I have to do children, school runs, etc. I have no help. That really limits the time I can commit to my work. My qualifications and skill sets are not necessarily acknowledged in UK. I cannot pursuit higher education or training as I noticed many of funding opportunities are limited to UK citizens or ILR holders.