Contact centre stopped visitation session

[MyFluentShaker]

What it means when contact centre has stopped contact mid way through session and is recommending that the lawyers are to be told that no further visits should go ahead
5 replies
MyFluentShaker · Today 16:57
This has just happened today so I don’t have all of the information. I was asked to come in and collect my child about 35-40 minutes into the hour long contact visit. They couldn’t say much as my child’s dad was in the other room but when I was walked out to my car she just said this isn’t going to work. We need a plan B, I'm going to contact the lawyers. That my son’s dad made zero effort and couldn’t keep my child safe.
is it likely that contact will be stopped from here? Will the judge order that he still has to attend even if the contact centre have said it’s not suitable? This is only the second visit. So in total he has spent about 1 hour and 40 minutes with my son in the past fortnight.

Yeah I bet he was drunk/high/angry or a combination.

I imagine if the contact centre won’t facilitate a visit his options are almost nil unless he can prove he’s changed. I think the breaks will be firmly on for a while.
Do you think he would make the effort to continue?

I'm surprised no one else has come to that very obvious conclusion
Didn't realise he was drunk or high when he arrived it became obvious he was so they called you

Yeah, he’s showed no interest until recently. Not sure what prompted him to start but here we are and thanks

I really can’t say, I didn’t think he’d go to the centre in the first place as I had reached out before my son was one and asked him to be a parent but that he’d have to go through the centre and he refused to stating “only junkies use them, i don’t want to be seen there”
I was really hopeful that he had grown and changed for our sons sake

They didn’t mention any substance misuse but said he couldn’t keep my son safe and contact had to end and they would be contacting the lawyers to stop contact or see if there were any other options. I’ve not heard back from them since the visit ended yesterday

My son is four and a half. I wasn’t told of any substance misuse. Contact is in the centre as he hasn’t been in my son’s life until now and was extremely violent towards me. All that was said to me was that he couldn’t keep my son safe and from what I gather interacted with him very little

No, social work is not involved. This is court ordered supervised visitation as he hasn’t been in his sons life and has been violent towards me

Both parties lawyers. I didn’t get a chance to talk. The dad was in a room off to the side and it had thin walls so she had to whisper that there was no emotion, no interaction, no safeguarding. My son was in a heightened emotional state so it took us about 5 minutes to get outside. I was sort or rushed to my car to get away so that he could leave but it was said that this cannot continue. He “showed nothing, absolutely nothing” she seemed quite shocked by this. Im not sure exactly what it meant but from what I gather there was no interaction and no response from dad. Completely apathetic towards our child. To the point it has raised serious concerns with the supervisors and they have decided to stop all contact as a result of it. I’ve not had any further information. I have contacted the centre (by phone and email) multiple times since but haven’t had a response yet. Saturday is the only “working day” where supervised visits occur but weekdays the phone lines are open and I will be in touch as soon as they open tomorrow. I really don’t have any more information. It was a rushed interaction while trying to get a distressed child out of the environment and Into the car and we had to leave as soon as we got in the car so the father could leave the centre

I have emailed and got in contact by phone. I’ve not had a response. I had the call log of the visitation ending early. There is cctv in the facility also so I will request that if they change their version of events but I don’t think they will. I am contacting as soon as they open in the morning and requesting a full report in writing. I will also be contacting my lawyer

The contact is arranged through the court. Not by the parents. They have all court reports and all documents provided to the court by both parties lawyers. They go through this before the initial visit is set up. They know who our legal representatives are and have full background of the situation. They contact our lawyers, they reached out to both of ours before the first visit to clarify a few things. They will provide statements and full write up of the visitation that is given to both of our lawyers and the court. This is a government service not a private centre. I car give any more information than what I have and what was said to me. They can and have contacted our lawyers previously. This is a service used by our legal system and is ran by them to facilitate contact between parents and children

To me it sounds as if he has just ignored his son and when prompted by staff to engage he’s swore at them or raised his voice. The staff are there to do a job do and won’t tolerate abuse.

It sounds like dad just sat there like a mannequin and watched the kid have a meltdown. Dad is likely on the spectrum. You sound like a great mum but you talk about dad all the time at home. That might not be helpful in this instance. No vegetarian wants to repeatedly hear how great steak is. Maybe ease up in that while you await the outcome of the case.

I try not to talk about him too much but you could be right. I only bring it up occasionally, like when he’s painting a lot of pictures i ask if he wants to make one for daddy. He usually doesn’t want to but has said yes this week to one thing. I have reached out and asked for support and advice before the initial contact order was made on how to approach things. Was given some great advice and have tried to follow it. I just didn’t want my son to feel like it wasn’t okay for him to talk about his dad or how he had fun or did this or that around me. He’s not the type of kid that can communicate as well as his peers at this stage, we have our ways and it works. I just didn’t want him to think he couldn’t talk freely or that I wasn’t happy to hear about the things he came to talk to me about. As long as he’s happy I am. Tbh i am pretty upset by yesterday’s events. More so than I thought I would be, I’m his mum so I’m biased but he’s the most incredible little human and I hoped his dad would see that and be as enthusiastic about him as I am. That’s not the case unfortunately and I’m hurt and let down on my sons behalf