Advice sought about harassment from person abroad

[StarlightRobot]

Reposting this here in the legal section based on the suggestion from Mumsnet admin.

Hi everyone, I am changing some details for privacy but the premise is the same. A close friend is being harassed by a family member who lives abroad- receiving abusive calls, voicemails and text messages. The abusive person has also posted abuse about my friend on social media that has been taken down (after she reported it). The content is horrible and crazy. The abusive person is using new phones with numbers she doesn’t recognise, so blocking calls hasn’t stopped it completely. The abusive person is mentally unwell with a history of mental illness and drug addiction. The person is fixated on my friend. I am not aware of any violent behaviour but it would not surprise me. The calls and abuse have escalated over Christmas.

I am wondering if any of this would interest the police here in the UK because the abusive person is doing all of this from abroad and so it is a cross border issue. My friend feels safe because this person is in another country but the messages are causing her a lot of distress.

My friend does not have any public social media accounts. The post on social media about my friend was on a public account, intended to spread misinformation about my friend, and this was located via a Google search.

If you have any experience or advice I would appreciate your views on what to do, if anything.

Bump

Has she thought about contacting the police in the country the family member is in?

@PennyLaneisinmyheartandmysoul

That is one of the options we are considering. Again, I don’t know if local police would be interested when she is abroad. The countries are very far apart- abuser is in NZ and friend is in England. My instinct is that this should be reported somewhere because of the escalation and to create a record. The abuse has not gone so far as threats of violence but it is direct abuse (profanities, insults, etc) and threats to post online.

The police here wouldn’t be able to do much as the harassment is originating in a foreign country. The police in the country where the offender lives could help but would depend on what the law is there. Why doesn’t they just block them?

Why doesn’t she just change her phone number? You could contact the police on the non-emergency number and ask for advice.

Sorry I saw she has tried blocking them , but like pp said she could change her number.

@ThePoshUns

She has blocked the number repeatedly but the abuser is calling on new devices and so the messages still come through. She has just disabled voicemail to stop abusive voicemails. The texts keep coming.

@yeesh
Yes, she could change her number. We don’t know how the abuser got the number in the first place. We suspect from another person in the family. If she changes her number then she will need to make it clear with all family that it can't be shared. I do think she should do this

Changing the number won’t stop the possibility of further online abuse. The abuser is currently locked out of TikTok and Facebook which is good - this is following my friend reporting malicious posts. Maybe that is the best she can do, ie monitoring online content and reporting the abuse when it pops up.

I feel like the abuser will be able to dodge consequences because this is international. The other thing that worries me is what we don’t know- the abuser has been so malicious I worry that he is doing the same to someone else, but we just don’t know about that. I think reporting to the police may be important.

I may call 101 on Monday for some advice

You could report so it’s on record incase the person ever comes here.
But I would change my phone number/email and only give the new one to people I really trust.

AI Overview

+5

New Zealand's harassment law involves the
Harassment Act 1997, covering criminal and civil harassment, allowing for restraining orders for patterns of unwanted, fear-inducing behaviour like following or unwanted contact, with a new Crimes Legislation Amendment Act 2025 specifically targeting stalking and harassment as serious offences, introducing up to 5 years imprisonment and defining these as patterns of specified acts causing fear for safety, coming into force in May 2026

https://www.police.govt.nz/

It seems you can make an on line report to the NZ Police

Try it and see what happens