Finalising an estate

[Fromwayupnorth]

I am both executor and beneficiary for my aunt's estate. The other beneficiary (my cousin) is not an executor and has refused to communicate with me at all since my aunt died. The proceeds of the estate can now be distributed but I'm not sure how to do this. My understanding is that (ideally) my cousin should sign their approval of the estate accounts, and also sign to confirm receipt of the money. I know they won't do this. They will want the money but will not do anything to facilitate the process at all. This includes sending me their bank details. Does anyone know the best way for me to proceed? Thank you.

Post her a copy of the accounts and a cheque?

Thank you for your reply. I'm just worried that we wouldn't be protected ie they could come back later to dispute the accounts or to claim they never received the cheque. I just want this to be done and dusted with no further come back but unsure how to achieve it. They would be pleased if we had to keep chasing them for a response or signature and to keep us hanging for as long as possible.

Send it all by special delivery so they can’t claim they haven’t received it? If you are concerned about potential comeback, send the accounts first with a deadline by which they need to respond with any queries and if you don’t hear anything then send the cheque? Hopefully any of your attempts of communication to date have been in writing so can always be referenced if there are any problems down the line?

Are you using a solicitor? If so, get them to do it.

Oh, and if they're not an executor, they don't have to approve estate accounts although if they are a residuary beneficiary, they do have the right to see them after they've been approved.

Send them the estate accounts and ask them to send you their bank details so you can transfer direct. Make sure to confirm their bank details over the phone.

They don’t need to approve. Just send them a copy of the accounts and a cheque (if you have an executor account, or the Bank will raise a single cheque for you ) by Registered Post. Remind your cousin they have only six months to cash to cheque, check this with your Bank as I may be wrong.
She/He can then choose to cut their nose off if they really want to, but not many could resist an actual cheque for a decent amount of money.
Sorry for the loss of your aunt and that your cousin has made the hard job of probate much harder.

We had a nightmare trying to use cheques to settle my uncles estate. The account was with Lloyds and they returned every single one I think as signature differed (it really didn’t beyond the usual handwriting variations) once it was in the system like that, even speaking to a human providing everything from birth certificate to passport it was too late to do it. Eventually it took 3 hours with a lovely member of staff making the payments from the bank, every single one got flagged to their fraud team that involved a 15/20 minute phone call. The fraud team wouldn’t wait on the phone to process the others it was just awful.

I think all you can do is write recorded delivery to your cousin. Contain a copy of the accounts advise that in order to distribute the estate you need x,y,z information, give them 2 weeks, then write again this time along the lines of:

hi knobhead further to my letter of x I have yet to receive a reply, if I don’t receive x information by y date I will place the money in a non interest paying account and advise a solicitor to contact you for the details, any fees for this will be deducted from your half of the money.

I suppose phoning them won’t work? Is there another family member that can shake the stupidity out of them?

I would leave their share in the solicitor's client account abd send a letter by soecial delivery advising them to contact x solicitor with their bank account details in order that their inheritance from x can be transferred to them

Thanks CharlotteStreetW1. No, we are not using a solicitor. They are a residual beneficiary and, whilst they don't have to approve the accounts, it is recommended. I just want to put this to bed and not have something come up again in the future so really want it all approved and signed off if possible.

Thank you redfishcat and Billybagpuss for your suggestions. I didn't know that there was a time limit with cheques and so like the idea of just sending a cheque by registered post and everything being over within a set time period. I might speak to the bank though and see if they forsee any issues with this.

Sadly Billybagpuss, they have blocked me via phone and Whatsapp and there is no one else in the family who are willing to get involved. To be fair, there has been alot of nastiness and I'm not sure I blame them. I don't think I'll ever agree to be an executor again!

Thank you all for your comments.