I split up with my ex a few months ago
There are2 children involved 1 is his he is 4 and I've brought him up. the other is one which is a child we had together.
At the beginning I offered daily calls weekly photos and weekend meet ups I just needed a few weeks head space.
He refused and just said calls.which he now has once a week but refuses to let me talk to the child i brought up or let the siblings on the call together
In the meantime after swinging from I love you come back texts to subtle threat ones He had called social services and made an allegation against me harming his child .
This was checked and I was cleared. However his own child was then placed on a child in need complex plan
I decided to try mediation which he refused to go to and the day he got that email he made another allegation saying our child had a bruise on his head during a call, again checked and cleared as I had been recording calls as he was starting to be erratic in his actions. He called the GP where I live now and demanded it was changed back to the surgery next to him, they informed social and myself this had been attempted
Our 1st court date is next Thursday and he has text me asking to sort it out between ourselves which I have declined as when the social worker came she was quite stern saying get a child arrangement order and do not meet him till it's sorted (this made nervous as to what she knows and I dont) as he had previously said if I left him i would never see the kids again.
He has angry outbursts and punches holes in walls and doors which I have photos of (never hit me ) and then behaves like nothing happened
Social also told me to report the texts to the police which I did but they said its coercive control but not enough for a case. He smokes weed in the evenings but as far as I know not around the kids
The flat he lives in has a mould problem and the kids were always at the doctors with chesty coughs and a few times hospital. When I had my cafcass call I was told that he had in the last 10 years been served a child abduction notice but they had to do further investigation (scary)
Hes never paid attention to the children, never got up at night, won't take them to the park just has his head buried in his phone or out doing photography all the time and would vanish for a week or 2 every few months
He has severe adhd unmedicated which he says himself means he cant communicate ,process or concentrate
He demanded I remove all pictures of his child even if they have both children in which I didn't do as they are siblings im not going to delete thier history thats not fair. He repeatedly had my socials banned and admitted it to social that he has people looking at my accounts
He has put down all allegations are untrue and he has had a personal attack on his life and fears for his safety. And he wants our child to live with him in a Christian home (never even been to church) and I threatened abduction to Wales (no idea where that came from I have no links to wales)
I just want to get on with life at this point I have requested the court say contact centre for visits and that they will allow sibling contact too.
I'm going to ask to see the other child but have been told I may have to make a separate application but im going to try.
I guess im asking if a judge would actually give him our child full time.
Run down
Weed
Angry outbursts holes in doors
Unmedicated Adhd makes him unpredictable
Child abduction notice a few years ago (I have no details on this yet it was shared by cafcass with me)
Attempted to change his doctors
Child in need plan for his child
Threats to abduct our child
2 false allegations against me to social (case closed on both)
Coercive behaviour
Doesn't engage with the children
Unclean 2 bed flat
Un safe grandparents ( incident in front of the children)
Ex said he took thier child from her.
I work
I live with my family at the moment with our own room
Have very good savings
Attend children's groups 4 times a week
The home is clean and our child had not been ill once since leaving
All our childs basic needs are met and they have bloomed in thier development since leaving.