Custody

[TheTwinklyMoose]

when he was 20 and the child was 15 he has a child of his own that has a child in need plan and he has severe adhd and gets angry and hits doors. and smokes weed before bed. He's made 2 false allegations to social services which i was cleared and the case was closed what's the likelihood of him getting custody of our shared child
Our child is 2 i have a supportive family and I work part time with substantial savings our child is now sleeping through the night and potty training, goes to multiple groups and is settled with a strong bond to me and family members.

Impossible to say as the judge will have far, far more information than that and from both sides.

Sorry I don't really understand your post/ question particularly the first part. Are you asking about the likelihood of your 20 year old boyfriend getting custody of your 2 year old child and where does the 15 year old come into it? What country are you in, England, Scotland, NI or elsewhere as the law is different in different places? Is the father named on the birth certificate of the child and what involvement have they had to date, when did you break up and how much contact have they had since then?

In general in England/ Wales, we don't use the language of 'custody' any more, courts talk about residence or 'living with' and contact or 'spending time with'. The most usual set-up after a break up is the child lives with whoever was their primary carer before the break-up (nearly always the mother) and spends time with their other parent. How much time and where/when/whether this is direct or indirect, supervised or unsupervised depends on everyone's circumstances. It's very unusual and has to be quite extreme circumstances for the court to order the child to have no contact with their father at all, but equally they would very rarely order a change of residence to live with the father if the child is settled and thriving where they are and the mother is willing to facilitate court ordered contact with the father. If care of the child was previously totally shared between parents before the court could however order 50:50 shared care or something like it, it all depends really.

The best thing generally all round is to come to some kind of sensible arrangement with your ex outside of court, using a mediation service if needed. I know this can be very hard though. If you can it would be good to take some proper legal advice.

I tried mediation but he was contacted by mediation services he refused and this is when he contacted social with false allegations there is now a date for a child arrangement order. Sorry I was trying to say before we got together he had a child abduction notice but this has only just been disclosed to me I had no idea at the time .
There is a pattern of coercive control which I have reported to the police
He has a video call once a week but I am hoping for supervised contact

He has severe adhd which is unmedicated and says thats why he smokes weed . Granted not around the children

The court will consider all evidence presented.
Your child has the right yo see his dad eg contact centre initially if there are concerns

People on here will give you some v bad advice. A child abduction warning notice is serious, as is coercive control. You may well qualify for legal aid and you should definitely find out about this asap, as a good solicitor will be very helpful