Contact arrangements

[Loulouc19]

Ok this is long sorry it’s about my grandson and contact with his dad. Both parents only 17 when he was born he’s four now. Has a very forceful nanny on dad’s side. Dad had abandoned them when he was five weeks old and in hospital with covid. Had been going with someone else throughout the pregnancy. Anyway few years down line the nanny wanted to see child. Ended up in high court due to dad’s low ability and special needs. He sees him on a supervised court order due to what he told a psychiatrist/psychologist at the contact initial court hearing. He has to be supervised by the nanny until child is 18. We don’t really know why exactly. He sees dad twice a week for three hours. Nanny asked a few weeks ago about child being unsupervised by her and dad taking him to shop alone we refused and reminded her of court order. We have now got a solicitors letter asking for more contact - apparently two more hours per week. Spoke to them explained wouldn’t work as child at preschool and routine massively interrupted by new proposal. Had asked in March for extra time after discussion solicitor told us not to do as we could be seen in breach of court order. Roll forward to now and threatening with court again. Nothing has changed in their circumstances they don’t have any other commitments and don’t take him anywhere. We have given the odd extra hour when they asked and happy enough to do this on ad hoc basis and not every week. Any one been in a similar situation? Thanks

hi IANAL but i find your post quite interesting. I speak as a grandmother myself.

Firstly you speak as if you are the guardian of your child, is that the case?

I realise that the mother is young but actually it is her, not you that is the concerned party, in any legal proceedings, unless as above you have the legal status as a guardian.

As for the “Nanny” she is of equal moral and familial status to you, and is a grandparent too.

As she has been nominated by the Court to supervise contact, i can only assume that she is not a risk to the child.

It seems to me that the person who really wants a relationship with this child is the nanny, and the only way for her to do this is via her son, hence her “forceful” approach.

Have you considered ( as you seem to the person in control) nurturing some kind of relationship with your counterpart the nanny. Whereby your grandson gains the benefit of two active grandparents, a special thing.