Stopping access for Dad

[Mspeace]

Hi would appreciate some advice please…
I have been divorced 4 years and have a 9 year old child. Ex husband has mental health issues. He has maintained contact with child but no legal order in place. His behaviour has become increasingly erratic over the last year. Not turning up/ dropping off at the wrong time etc.
Our marriage was very abusive.
Last week I was called to child school where headteacher told me he has concerns about his mental health and that he has access to child. Ex husband has made numerous malicious allegations about me, staff, parents. I have also discovered he is filming our child pretty much constantly when they are together.
I have stopped contact after this.
unsure of next steps? He is totally unreasonable and I not able to have any conversation with him. Do I need to apply for a court order or do I wait for him to act?
I am keen for child to maintain some kind of relationship with dad but I need to know that this safe.

If u are in England, then u wait for him to apply to court or contact you for contact/access.

i suppose if u think he is unwell you can give advise for him to see GP, you could contact gp yourself (with info from school to back u up).

im not sure what court order you would be applying for yourself? But im not a lawyer.

keep records in case u need evidence for future court hearings

Thanks. I just worry that me stopping access could look bad if he does take me to court. the police contacted his gp a few months back with concerns but it had no impact.

What do you mean it had no impact? On his mental health? It's great that this evidence is recorded as well as the evidence from the school. It won't reflect badly on you if you've got a good reason to stop contact.

No impact as in it didn’t change his behaviour. If anything it’s got worse.

If common sense were to prevail, you will look better protecting your child.

Is it worth telling the school he can’t pickup his kids? Guessing that won’t work as he’s their parent too.

i would be prepared for school to contact social services RE him. What do you mean by filming your child? Does he have hidden cameras?

wait for him to act

Yes school are supportive in not allowing dad to collect. He does have PR but they have agreed to stall and do what they can if he turns up.
I have asked them to refer to social services, which they have. I am hoping they will now contact me.
He has cameras in his home and he uses his phone to record when they are out and about. He records their conversation and also him dropping and picking her up at school.

@MspeaceOf course you can go to court and get contact sorted out. Why don’t you see a family law solicitor? Talk over the issues. You should be able to restrict his contact but talk to a solicitor.

Having cameras in his home is bizarre if the kids aren’t aware they’re being recorded and it’s not like a baby monitor. Could you not contact the police?

Yes I have contacted the police. They said he is free to record whoever/whatever he likes on his own property.
they agreed that his behaviour was of concern and said they would contact his GP buy he wasn’t doing anything criminal.

@Mspeace Don’t bother with the police. See a family law solicitor.