I am waiting for a section 7 to be completed for my 10yo son. My ex is a horrible bully and for the last few years our child has been incredibly distressed when arriving back home. I can evidence this though reports from two different therapists, his school, GP and Children’s Services. I’m sure Cafcass will also be able to confirm many of our child’s experiences when they meet him too. He’s terrified of his dad and during the process so far I have had to reduce contact from overnight to daytimes to FaceTime due to my exes escalating behaviour. Since he has only had FaceTime contact, our son is coping much better, which has also been noted by the school and one of the therapists.
My ex has has plenty of chances to rectify his behaviour, but still continues to deny its a problem and says that I have made everything up and that everything is hunky dory at his house.
The initial safeguarding report supported what I have said and agreed that no direct contact should take place for now, however recommended the possibility of us going on some courses to learn how to co-parent. I find this alarming because I have evidenced DV which he has also admitted to, so to expect that we would now learn how to co-parent together is unacceptable in my mind. Not only does it not specifically identify who the high conflict person is, allowing for the assumption that were both as bad as each other, it potentially grants him access to to resume it. Would I be viewed as uncooperative if I tell the court that I don’t want to do these courses/have to communicate with my ex?
I understand and want these proceedings to focus on achieving what’s best for our son, but how do I ensure that my well-being isn’t compromised by them brushing over my experiences and forcing me to engage with him?