Writing an urgent will - executor question

[bastardkitty]

I need to write a will at the earliest opportunity (within a week) due to a rapidly deteriorating health situation. I am single with 2 adult children. The youngest lives at home.

I own my house outright (value around £260k) and there are some modest savings - under £50k. My work will pay a similar amount of death in service benefit. I want to leave everything to my children in a 50/50 split. I know this would be the case if I die intestate, or at least I believe this to be the case.

I want to make provision in the will for the young adult DC to have the option to stay in the family home without paying rent/costs except bills, for up to 3 years after my death before the house has to be sold. Is this a straightforward thing to do or very complicated? My older DC owns their own home. There is a gap in ages and life stages.

I am unsure whether to make my 2 DCs the executors of the will. My older DC would likely take a lead and the younger one wouldn't engage
I also have 2 trusted friends who will act as executors for me. Please could you comment on the wisdom of these 2 options? I wouldn't want the younger DC to be placed under any pressure to sell the house quickly and I'm aware my older child will have to wait for their main inheritance. Finally, do I need to go see a solicitor to do this or can I use a will-writing service because it's straightforward?

Thanks in advance if you can offer guidance. I need to move fast, unfortunately, so just trying to save time around the key decisions.

Given that what you’re planning, although a 50/50 split, but with some caveats, whatever you spend on a solicitor will be worth every penny for your children’s future relationship. I don’t think this is suitable for a diy Will.

Im sorry you’re facing this, and with time pressure too💐

Thank you @Jeezitneverends Any thoughts on who to make executors? I'm struggling to know what's best.

What an awful situation, but at least you still control over some part of life.

I agree with the PP, get to a family solicitor and get the will written 'properly' so at least your final wishes can be followed through.

Just to add, ask the solicitor for their estimated cost to be the executor.

Thank you @Ifailed , I will ask that question

Not a lawyer, no legal experience - just been front row a few times dealing with estates. My 2 pennies is to select one executor, and a reserve. But not joint. I would choose the oldest child, personally.

After death, emotions run high. Joint executors often leads to fall outs. It’s cleaner with just one, imo.

Side note, make sure that you have updated your life assurance expression of wish form with work. Having a freshly dated one lets them know these are your latest wishes. Same with any and all pension plans you have. The life assurance and pension expression of wish forms are rarely linked these days. These are far easier to update than the will. Literally a 3 minute job online.

Thanks for your thoughts @JustMyView13 . I'm wary of DC1 as sole executor because they would need to act to protect DC2 almost against their own interests. But I have no experience in this - sorry that you do.

I have a public sector pension and have done my death in service benefit nomination. Do you think there is something more I need to do?

I should say that I do still have a treatment option, but things are quite tenuous at the moment as it may just not be possible.

A good solicitor can advise you in regards to executors. IF you have concerns about the management of your estate it is possible to appoint a solicitor to act as an executor to ensure fair play all round. It’s a bit more expensive but worth it if you are unsure your last wishes will be followed through.

Yes, @triballeader I guess, this is part of the legal advice I need. Otherwise I guess the will would be incredibly straightforward and I could just tell the DCs my wishes about DC2 being able to stay in the house for a few years. Thank you

@bastardkitty I really hope the treatment option comes through for you. However, it’s so sensible of you to sort all of this anyway because it will be one less stress for you.

Legally, DC1 will have to follow the Will. If you do the Will via a solicitor they can register it for you (vs the home kits which I’m unsure how they work). DC2 can contest if DC1 doesn’t act in accordance. You can also make it known to friends or family what the Will says & your solicitor can store it. (Socially it would be harder for DC1 to pull a fast one). Is DC1 a responsible character, or do you have concerns they may be tempted not to act with integrity? If you have any doubts, perhaps ask a trusted friend - alternatively the solicitor can do it (for a fee).

Public sector pensions are the rare occasion where it is all linked. It’s super important you don’t stop paying into your pension, as that’s typically the link for eligibility to the DIS lump sums. You should have an online portal you can log into to double check.

@JustMyView13 Thank you. DC1 is mostly responsible but I don't want to damage their relationship by setting up a conflict as there's no other family really. There are trusted, very long-term friends who will support and guide though. Obviously I can talk to DC1 about this in advance to give some heads up and actually, that's something I need to do.

"There are trusted, very long-term friends who will support and guide though."

Could you ask one of them if they would be prepared to be the executor?

Is there an existing conflict between the siblings? If not, talk to DC1 about it and try to get them to tell you their honest feelings and thoughts. If the sibling bond is strong, they won’t be upset at the idea of DC2 having time to grieve before having to find a new place to live. It’s only if there is a risk of DC2 running down the house or causing significant issues that there may be trouble.

I would say to get the solicitor to be the executor if you can. The paperwork is doable but time-consuming and unless DC1 is the type of person who needs a concrete task to see them through tough times, it can be overwhelming alongside work/family/grief.

We used our local solicitor practise, same practice we used for house purchases but a Will guy. We nominated the practise as Executor. Could that be an option?

I think you can put the request in place for the house to not be sold for a period of time.

Two friends have already agreed to do this, but it sounds like people think it's easier for just one person to do it. I think it might make it easier for the DCs if they don't have to do the executing. Both DCs absolutely trust my 2 friends.

DCs are not in conflict, but are very different and one is sensitive and can be volatile.

I've dealt with a few estates as executor, given the circumstances I would appoint the solicitor as executor, it can be a tough job at an emotionally charged time - and will be hard for your DC, they can be executors alongside the solicitor, so they are not taken out of the process, but supported by a professional.

It is likely you will have to form a will trust for the property, giving the younger an interest until they are say 25 or 30, this will require trustees, again the solicitor can act as one trustee with your DC as co-trustees.

Then this sounds like the perfect solution.

In terms of picking a friend, perhaps have one as the executor and one as the reserve in case they’re unable to act for any reason. A solicitor can guide you on this properly.

I'm sorry you are going through this OP.

What you are suggesting for DC2 is an occupation trust. If DC1 is sole executor (and trustee) he will be in sole charge of the trust for DC2. DC2 will have a right of occupation but you will need to set aside money from the estate to be used for upkeep etc before sale. I suggest a professional executor/trustee would be better.

Also ask a solicitor, or a willwriter who is a member of the IPW or SWW to draft your will as a home written one could go horribly wrong.

Thank you - I will do this

Absolutely all of this. Pay for proper legal advice so you don't leave a muddle for your children. I am so sorry about your illness.

Absolutely, DIY wills are fine when its very simple, but when there are trusts created then it needs to be professionally drafted as even one word used incorrectly can cause a world of trouble invalidating what you are attempting to do.

I’m sorry to hear you’re poorly 💛
Your executor needs to be somebody you trust 100% to fulfil your wishes.
I am my Dad’s executor even though me fulfilling his wishes means I might not get inheritance for another 20 years or so but I don’t see it as my money whereas my brothers see it as theirs so can’t be trusted.

Are your friends completely unbiased and trustworthy? I’d make those executor along with a reputable solicitor x

This is why I would advocate a solicitor, not only are you needing an executor, but trustees for the interest trust for the younger DC. Trustees can, with the beneficiaries agreement wind up and distribute the trust asset - especially in the two years following the death before it has to be registered.
The danger is that if both your DC are the trustees they could (foolishly or with one acting in their own interest) disband the trust and go ahead and split the asset, which may be disadvantageous to the younger.
Having a solicitor as trustee would make that much less likely, as they will follow your instructions.

Thanks for your wisdom, everyone. My friends are unbiased, know both children well and can be trusted to consider both of them and to act fairly. I've also already discussed my wishes with them and they are both in agreement with my wishes. I have the best friends.