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Original poster

3 beneficiaries wish to sell family home as per will, but 1 beneficiary threatening to refuse consent to sale

70 replies

Watershedno5 · 11/05/2025 10:29

I am the eldest of 4 children. We are all in our 50s. Our mother died a few years ago and our stepfather died 18 months ago. My stepfather left a will leaving all assets to be divided equally among the 4 kids. Probate has been granted and my parents' savings have been divided among us.
We three sisters want to sell the family home and divide the proceeds as per the will, but my brother lives in the house (he moved back in with our parents over 20 years ago) and is doing his best to delay the sale.
I live abroad and my sisters live hundreds of miles away from the house, in different parts of the UK. However, my sisters regularly drive to the house to help whittle down belongings, clean the place, etc. In the 18 months since our stepfather died we have never asked for any rent from our brother and we also agreed to him having a lodger for 6 months as a bit of income for him (he doesn't have a regular job). We have explained a million times that after the sale of the house he will have enough money to buy a one-bed flat outright, in the same town. My sisters have offered to help guide him through the process of moving and buying. But he ignores all advice.
He is not mentally incapacitated in any way but he is incredibly stubborn. He has talked about squatters' rights, involving lawyers, claims he has had a breakdown (untrue seeing as my sisters see him at least once a month), says he'll never forgive us for throwing him out of his home, etc.
He wanted to buy us out but he doesn't have the money and can't get a mortgage due to no job. He says he was not given the legal amount of notice about our desire to sell, however that is moot seeing as he's known about our wish to sell since Nov 24 (our stepfather died in nov 23) and the house won't now go on the market until early Aug 25 as we have to wait for lodger to move out and it will then take a month for my sisters to get house and garden shipshape after general neglect (which will be tricky with our brother living there).
My concern is that if we got a buyer, my brother could refuse to sign the sale and purchase agreement. At what point would it be wise to get a court order for sale? I don't know how long it takes or what is involved or how much it costs. We're hoping our brother will accept that the house sale has to happen, but how can we get one step ahead of him if he wants to be obstructive?
By the way, he is single, has never been married and has no dependants. He is the youngest of the four of us.
Any advice gratefully received.

OP posts:
Gemstonebeach · 11/05/2025 10:34

I don’t have any advice, I just wanted to say I am sorry this is happening. Such a shame when he can buy his own home outright with his inheritance.

viques · 11/05/2025 10:39

Who are the executors? Surely they have a legal duty to fulfil your stepfathers wishes, and the only way to do that is to sell the property.

The only thing I can suggest is that you try to show him some suitable properties that he could buy with his share. If he sees that they will be easier and cheaper to maintain and heat, no gardenif that is what he finds hard, two bedrooms if he wants the option of an occasional lodger, he might be persuaded. It is a big step for him and I think you might catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.

BeNiceWhenItsFinished · 11/05/2025 10:41

I agree with @viques in that this is a decision to be taken by the executor(s) who have a duty to carry out what is in the will.

Nenas · 11/05/2025 10:42

The key as others have said is who the executor/s is/are.

Nenas · 11/05/2025 10:45

As him being a beneficiary is irrelevant to the execution of the will

Original poster
Watershedno5 · 11/05/2025 10:46

Thanks. I can only think that he is terrified of moving on. He doesn't need a 3 bed house as it's just him. We three sisters aren't super wealthy and, most importantly, our parents wanted to divide the inheritance equally. We think he finds any change very hard to cope with and unfortunately he's turning this situation into a battle.

OP posts:
Soontobe60 · 11/05/2025 10:49

Who is the executor of your stepfathers will?

Original poster
Watershedno5 · 11/05/2025 10:57

The executor is my brother in law. His plan is to put the house on the market as per the will. But I assumed we, the beneficiaries, would all have to sign some kind of document agreeing to the sale. Are you saying that this is not necessary? That it is just up to the executor? Ie we don't need our brother'
s written agreement? That would be a relief if that is the case.

OP posts:
Icebreakhell · 11/05/2025 10:59

Watershedno5 · 11/05/2025 10:57

The executor is my brother in law. His plan is to put the house on the market as per the will. But I assumed we, the beneficiaries, would all have to sign some kind of document agreeing to the sale. Are you saying that this is not necessary? That it is just up to the executor? Ie we don't need our brother'
s written agreement? That would be a relief if that is the case.

No, the executor doesn’t need any of you to sign anything. You might need to evict your brother though.

ByQuaintAzureWasp · 11/05/2025 11:02

Watershedno5 · 11/05/2025 10:46

Thanks. I can only think that he is terrified of moving on. He doesn't need a 3 bed house as it's just him. We three sisters aren't super wealthy and, most importantly, our parents wanted to divide the inheritance equally. We think he finds any change very hard to cope with and unfortunately he's turning this situation into a battle.

Well you've given him an income also so why would he not want to stay. I'd say all rent now is being split 4 ways.

Original poster
Watershedno5 · 11/05/2025 11:04

Thanks everyone for your speedy advice. I am feeling a lot more relaxed about the whole thing now. We know that the house will sell as it's in a good location and I'm mightily relieved to be told that legally my brother cannot prevent the sale. Hopefully, with a sale agreed, our brother will turn his mind to moving on. My sister has already offered to take him to view properties and will try again on her next visit.

OP posts:
dogcatkitten · 11/05/2025 11:05

Are you using a solicitor for the will? I would have thought they would insist the house was sold so that the distributions could be made according to the will. If one beneficiary wanted to keep the house they would have to buy out the others.

BangersAndGnash · 11/05/2025 11:15

So your BIL is not a blood relative to your brother?

I think this makes it easier.

Stop shilly shallying around trying to be nice to your brother and negotiating, because that isn’t your role at the moment and is giving jn g him the idea that somehow there is negotiation and leeway to be had.

Support you BIL to get legal advice about the best way to handle the order of selling the house and evicting your brother. Get the executor and or solicitor to formally tell your brother that there is a legal duty to implement the Will. And that is that.

If he appeal to you say ‘it’s not personal it’s a legal imperative and we can talk to you about it no more’.

It could be formally explained to him that eviction gives him the opportunity to but with his share, and he should get on with finding somewhere so that he can move straight in. Otherwise he will be homeless for a while.

I hope you have not given him any kind of rights by agreeing to him renting a room .

Original poster
Watershedno5 · 11/05/2025 11:18

The executor, my brother in law, has been handling everything and done a very good job. He is quite meticulous.We already have probate. I assume a solicitor was used for that but I don't know for sure.
We gave our brother a year to grieve and then broached the matter of selling the house. My brother initially seemed on board with everything but has grown more difficult to deal with and currently isnt answering his phone at all. For some reason I thought we needed my brother's agreement. It seems I was mistaken.

OP posts:
Keepingthingsinteresting · 11/05/2025 11:21

Watershedno5 · 11/05/2025 11:04

Thanks everyone for your speedy advice. I am feeling a lot more relaxed about the whole thing now. We know that the house will sell as it's in a good location and I'm mightily relieved to be told that legally my brother cannot prevent the sale. Hopefully, with a sale agreed, our brother will turn his mind to moving on. My sister has already offered to take him to view properties and will try again on her next visit.

Your problem isn’t bout him signing the transfer, as PP have said that is for the executor. The issue will be the need to rpovide vacant possession and if he won’t move the executors will be in breach of the terms of sale and there there are fines etc. I think sadly the executor needs to start the eviction process now as that takes months and if he still won’t go you will need to go for enforcement and billings, which isn’t fun. I’m sorry your going through this as it will probably break the family up, but o don’t see what else you can do as he can’t lock the whole thing up forever as will prolly let the house go to ruin in the meantime.

Nenas · 11/05/2025 11:24

Your brother is behaving disgracefully with threats etc. Why does he think he can live in a house that has been left to three other people?

The executor needs to employ a solicitor and get the eviction process started. Now. The longer you tolerate this ridiculous behaviour, the harder the process will be.

IMustDoMoreExercise · 11/05/2025 11:26

Watershedno5 · 11/05/2025 11:18

The executor, my brother in law, has been handling everything and done a very good job. He is quite meticulous.We already have probate. I assume a solicitor was used for that but I don't know for sure.
We gave our brother a year to grieve and then broached the matter of selling the house. My brother initially seemed on board with everything but has grown more difficult to deal with and currently isnt answering his phone at all. For some reason I thought we needed my brother's agreement. It seems I was mistaken.

Your problem is evicting him.

We had a similar issue, but luckily my BIL found somewhere to rent quickly and left.

We contacted a solicitor and they said it could cost £50k to evict him.

Original poster
Watershedno5 · 11/05/2025 11:38

We said he could rent out a room for 6 months only. Partly I think it was a delaying tactic on his part. The 6 months is up at the end of June. I will take your advice and leave it all to the executor. Thank you for taking the time to advise.
He was the carer for our stepfather and it became quite an ordeal towards the end. So we wanted to give our brother time to adjust, grieve. Our brother has been trying to lay a massive guilt trip on us individually and I must say it's been very effective. But we're now over it and just want to get this sorted.

OP posts:
godmum56 · 11/05/2025 11:38

Watershedno5 · 11/05/2025 10:57

The executor is my brother in law. His plan is to put the house on the market as per the will. But I assumed we, the beneficiaries, would all have to sign some kind of document agreeing to the sale. Are you saying that this is not necessary? That it is just up to the executor? Ie we don't need our brother'
s written agreement? That would be a relief if that is the case.

What precisely did the will say? because i have been here. IIRC If the will says the house to be sold and the proceeds divided then the executor can go ahead. If the will says that the house is left to the 4 siblings with no direction as to how this should be enacted then I don't think the house can just be sold by the excecutor. Are there any other resources in the will? What the executor can do is use some of will resource on behalf of all the executors to take some legal advice about how to resolve this. If you express this to your brother as the probable next step then might this indicate to him your resolve to get this sorted and the fact that if he pushes this, he will end up with less from the will.

Original poster
Watershedno5 · 11/05/2025 12:20

godmum56 · 11/05/2025 11:38

What precisely did the will say? because i have been here. IIRC If the will says the house to be sold and the proceeds divided then the executor can go ahead. If the will says that the house is left to the 4 siblings with no direction as to how this should be enacted then I don't think the house can just be sold by the excecutor. Are there any other resources in the will? What the executor can do is use some of will resource on behalf of all the executors to take some legal advice about how to resolve this. If you express this to your brother as the probable next step then might this indicate to him your resolve to get this sorted and the fact that if he pushes this, he will end up with less from the will.

Show quote history

I devise and bequeath all my estate whatsoever and wheresoever unto my trustees upon trust to pay my funeral expenses etc.... and then to hold the residue thereof upon trust for such of my children and stepchildren [us 4 children named] as shall be living at my death and if more than one equally between them absolutely....

OP posts:
Hoppinggreen · 11/05/2025 12:36

As has been explained you may not need his actual agreement but if hr just refuses to engage at all you will need to evict him
Selling it with him still there will be virtually impossible I imagine

Mrsbloggz · 11/05/2025 12:43

@Watershedno5 your brother is taking the piss and then some!
I think there's a good chance that once he becomes aware that you all know he doesn't have a leg to stand on he will get himself together before he's out on the streets.

godmum56 · 11/05/2025 12:45

Watershedno5 · 11/05/2025 12:20

I devise and bequeath all my estate whatsoever and wheresoever unto my trustees upon trust to pay my funeral expenses etc.... and then to hold the residue thereof upon trust for such of my children and stepchildren [us 4 children named] as shall be living at my death and if more than one equally between them absolutely....

Show quote history

oh....ok. Does he realise the the executor can take the costs of evicting him out of the estate? That he WILL leave the house and that he will get less of an inheritance because of the additional cost he is causing?

Loopytiles · 11/05/2025 12:50

Executor should really have sought information and legal advice on this (foreseeable) scenario and his ability (without others’ approvals) and approach to sell the property & evict your brother way sooner, and should do so now IMO.

Icexream · 11/05/2025 13:10

Surely the executor has fulfilled his duty by transferring the property into the names of the 4 siblings? It's not the executor's role to sell it?