Social Services & next steps. Please help.

[FlyAwayFromHere]

Obviously there will be info missing here & I apologise for the length already, but I will add main points so as not to make the OP enormous & will answer anything that is asked.

My children's Social worker wrote a Section 7 report about me that is full of things that aren't true.

This includes conversations that me & her have had, but these havn't taken place, & multiple emails conversations that she's had with me, but hasn't actually sent these emails to me, as well as meetings that she's tried to set up, that hasn't happened.

My children tell her that I hurt them. This isn't true. However I completely understand her believing them. I'm not disputing her believing this.

Most worryingly though, my ex has claimed that he is worried about what I may do to the children & to himself, after the outcome of the court case.

I have a charity helping me who said that I cannot challenge this report yet, I need to wait for our final court hearing (In July)

We had a hearing yesterday & I just wrote on my statement that I have some concerns over this report & will challenge them at the next hearing.

This hearing ended with my children still staying with their dad & me no longer being able to have over night visits with one child (11) but it's still allowed with the second one (8) I can still see both children.

I have been accessing our SAR's which often paint a very different picture than the one the SW is expressing. EG I have our Cafcass notes & they are fine & accurate. I wanted these specifically as the SW has told school that 'There is an extremely damning report written about her & she is likely scared'. So I wondered what this damning report was. There isn't one.

I received an email yesterday from CAMHS stating that I cannot have these records as there is a risk of harm to my children if I have them. I wanted these specifically as it's stated that I took over my son's appointment & wouldn't let him speak, he hid & wouldn't engage with the worker (which is true however he engaged a little with grunts & nods, used his teddy to nod etc. this is 'normal' for him at appointments)

My ex told me that their appointment was much the same, my son hid & didn't really talk to her & she apparently said 'He hid like this the last time too'.

The SW states that there was a 'Marked & alarming difference between the Two appointments' & that my son engaged happily with his dad & didn't hide away at all.

Obviously I won't know now as I wasn't there, & I completely understand why I'm not allowed to see these notes.

My selfish question is, is there anything that I can do to protect myself here? I'm very worried that it's being thrown around all over the place that I'm an abuser, & I'm not allowed to challenge this until July. I'm worried for my future, jobs etc as I work in adult care (not currently working)

My charity worker who came with me yesterday, after the hearing was going through the S7 & saying 'We need to make sure that things like this, where the SW tries to arrange meetings etc & you don't respond, do actually happen'. I was in floods of tears at this point already & told her that these points aren't true, but that I'm not being given a chance to explain that to anybody.

This is obviously an absolute nightmare & all I want is for things to be better for my children. Please can somebody advise me of what I can do here? Please be kind to me. I have nobody to talk to.

I asked for extra support for my children at the end of the hearing yesterday, as this hadn't been mentioned although I'd written it in my statement, & they said that since we have this one SW then we aren't able to have anything else.

Hopeful bump.

What legal representation do you have? Our Cafcass officer admitted on the stand at the final hearing his 4 year's worth case was based on 'facts' from exh. Exh lost... Hopefully that Cafcass senior advisor was never allowed to work again. We also had a family officer who threatened me with losing my dc of I didn't play ball.. I threw her out of my home.
You need a barrister op. To dispute all this shit.

I don't have any. I have no money. I've put in an application for legal aid with a solicitor but they don't know if it will be accepted as it's 'weak' & obviously hasn't come through yet.

This charity are retired solicitors but they don't specialise in family law. They are able to be my McKenzie friend like yesterday but that's all I have.

My Cafcass officer (I only had the one phone interview with him & a few other calls) but he was really nice... However when I contacted them later & asked if they would have any contact with my children (again asking for extra support) they said that they wouldn't meet my children, they are finished with our family & that he's now left.

Sorry, Nosaucelikemintsauce, I should have thanked you for answering me & also I'm glad that you eventually had a good outcome.

I'm sorry I don't have the technical knowledge to help but I think if you can maintain the calm and factual and balanced approach you're showing here, that will go a long way to helping you.
And I suppose just calmly asking for evidence of their assertions at every opportunity.

Thank you User4274959. I appreciate any responses. I'm so upset today.

My general response is to go quiet & that's what happened at court yesterday once they'd told me the outcome... They had to keep prompting me for a response as I was just staring at the table trying not to get upset & thinking that it doesn't matter what I say now, the decision is made.

They did let me have a chat with my McKenzie friend & she prompted me to ask about the extra support for my children, which I did & then I just shrugged at her when the answer was 'No'.

I'm not being given chances to say that she is wrong. Not until July.

Go through everything with a friend. And a highlighter.. Speak up about blatant lies /errors..
I was on the stand for 5 hours.... It is gruelling. Your dc need your voice....

Nosaucelikemintsauce 5 hours?! What sort of things were they asking you?

I've been through the S7 & typed up an 18 page response (with evidence)

It's just this part where I can't tell anybody & everybody is hearing that I'm an abuser...

I don't really have any friends to go through things with. They distance themselves (I think that, as things have gone on, people are thinking 'Well there's no smoke without fire, there must be some truth in her hurting her kids') or they have their own things going on so it's just me really.

Hi OP. Firstly, this sounds awful - totally unacceptable for things to be said that didn't happen and really difficult to know how to challenge in such a formal environment.
I would advise a few things:

• It's normal for at least one parent to disagree about recommendations from a sw - that's fine and what the judge or magistrate is there for, to make a final decision. It's not ok for there to be things that are made up or didn't happen. So I would approach these two things differently. For the latter, go through the report thoroughly and identify the things that didn't happen - conversations, emails etc. Each one is a line point, then talk about any proof that it didn't happen. Don't worry if the sw did try and contact you but you weren't free - it's still not ok (obviously) for them to make up a subsequent conversation! Write down the truth of what happened in each instance as clearly as you can.
• Then look for who you can contact. Google a bit about it. I'm not sure who the best port of call is but you could see if the local LADO would be relevant. Also, your local councillor can be a good call. They can be quite good at escalating things or pointing you in the right direction. Focus on the fact that things have been made up - not your disagreement with the sw recommendations (again, because this is normal and no one has done anything wrong - you just disagree). You could try your MP too, not so much for personal support but again to be pointed in the right direction.

Social work is heavily regulated so there will be ways of drawing attention to this it's just a case of finding the right person. Also, and this is just my opinion - not something I know for certain - but I think you need to raise this before you go to court. Once in court, they will be focusing on the sw report and it may be difficult to say in front of everyone that essentially, half of it has been made up. I would also argue that if parts of it aren't true then you need another social worker and new report - I appreciate that's not ideal for the children but this is not acceptable and not meeting practice standards at all, and a final decision shouldn't be made without a report that is 100% accurate.

I hope this helps.

If you are saying that the social worker is lying about events and you have evidence of this.

You should ask to speak to their manager and complain.

i would also be asking for the meetings with social worker to be completed in twos or a different Sw and have your own friend present.

Court reports are rarely just a social workers opinion it contains info from places such as CAMHS, education and health.

Marshatessa Yes, the SW asked to meet me twice with both of my children for the S7 report. The first time I responded that we could see her that evening but I only had the one child, she responded that she would do it another time.

Then she asked if she could meet the 3 of us out on this afternoon & walk home behind us. I said that we could of course do this, but again I only had one child this evening, I asked if this was needed & could she not just meet us at home?... I never received a response to this.

However, the SW has written a whole paragraph about how our emails went back & forward with her repeatedly explaining to me that she needed to walk behind us for the S7 & me refusing to allow it. She then said that 'Multiple other attempts were made which I refused'. All not true.

There isn't much in the S7 from school, just that they believe that I am telling my daughter to say what she does (how do you prove this either way?)

After the SW told school (wrongly) that I had received a damning report from Cafcass they then asked her if I'm safe around the children at all & should I be blocked from picking them up later that day.

There isn't anything much from health really. One time my son was in hospital due to self harm & they had a meeting saying that I couldn't manage him (but obviously I had no knowledge of this at the time. However I've repeatedly voiced that I struggle with my son's behaviour so this isn't untrue)

But the SW states that my son was on tablets that are for a short term plan, not long term. He is under the care of the paediatrician for these tablets so that's easily proved to be false, but it all leads into 'Look how bad mum is, she also has him on tablets unnecessarily'.

The SW hasn't seen me with my children since June 2024.

Thank you for this helpful response, pugilist. I have my children this weekend so I will go through this again on Monday.

This is my worry, that I'm 'doing nothing' about this report, but at the same time I'm not sure 'what' to do. I was told that if I mention that I have concerns about the report, then at the hearing yesterday they would likely ask me for a brief description of these (& I had a brief response written down) but they didn't ask me.

I think I remember a previous thread

I don't have any practical advice but I hope somehow things work out and get better for you all x

Thank you purpleme12. I did a previous search but the complicating factor for this particular situation is that the children are saying that I hurt them. And my ex is obviously implying that too.

I’m concerned that they’ve told you not to complain now. I would. Write it all down calmly and factually. Point out the mistakes. There will be a route for challenging this I’m sure. Good luck.

Thank you Igmum. It seems to be the accepted thing, that you can't challenge this report until the next court case... I wonder if that's for standard cases of 'I don't agree with the SW/what my ex has said' though, & not stuff like this.

Hi
Have you been ordered to file a final statement as that is your official way of arguing your side.

Titasaduckarse I have but it's only a 4 page statement & I don't really want to wait until July before I point out these inaccuracies.

Op, are there any pro bono agencies in your area?

No, Eileen101 It was incredibly difficult to find solicitors who had space to even try to take me on as a legal aid client.

I'm going to go into Citizens advice next week. I spoke to them on the phone before the court case but the advisor just kept telling me not to fight things & to let my children go... If I have to let my children go then I at least want to have had a fare chance to share my side first.

Please contact Family Rights Group. Specialist charity for those involved with social services.

I don't know if this is something you have where you are, I'm not in UK, but when I was working out how to keep my DC safe from abusive ex the lawyer I saw said if he tried to get our DDs notes from her psychologist we could ask for them to go to an officer of the court and they could then disclose any relevant details to the judge, so ex wouldn't get to read them. Maybe there's someone who could read the notes from the SARs and tell the court the relevant details. Or could you just ask for them redacted so you only get the bits specifically about you and your responses and the times you communicated.

Thank you for the idea, EliflurtleAndTheInfiniteMadness. It said that I could ask our CAMHS worker directly, so I'll wait to see the response from that. I did get a letter afterwards detailing what happened & that didn't mention anything negative about our appointment.

It's such a horrible situation, having to 'Prove' everything. I've even had to get the notes from my own counselling sessions that have just finished, as she's written on the S7 that I 'Refuse to do anything to improve my MH'...

You need to complain about this NOW!. you should write a comprehensive email with screenshots and all the evidence you have attached and send it go the social workers manager cc the Head of children's services . The social Worker is not allowed to lie like this. Do not be scared alway remain factual and calm.

Who is telling you that you cannot complain now?. You can complain about the social worker at any time. Especially if you have proof.