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Original poster

Specific issue order - Scotland

11 replies

Exasperated80 · 23/02/2025 20:06

Posted on another thread but advised this might be better

Last year my ex refused to give permission for me to take our daughter to America for a holiday. He refused mediation and gave our solicitor the run around and we ended up having to go to court. The Sheriff found in our favour and we eventually got to go. However it resulted in a solicitors bill of £8,500!

Our daughter is 14 and desperately wants to go abroad again, however her dad has refused permission for her to leave the UK. This included a ski trip to France organised by her school.

I don't think I've any option but to go to court again but can't possibly afford the cost of last time!! Scottish law doesn't seem as straightforward as English law in that there not just a form you can complete. Everything I find just says to speak to a solicitor. Does anyone in Scotland have any experience and/or advice? Thanks 🙏

OP posts:
Lexlum · 24/02/2025 02:53

Yes unfortunately it would need to be done by a solicitor. You could ask the Court to award expenses in your favour which (if granted) means your exH will be liable to pay. An award of expenses is however never guaranteed and you should proceed on the basis that you will require to cover the costs yourself.

Have you looked into whether or not you qualify for legal aid?

Original poster
Exasperated80 · 24/02/2025 07:41

Lexlum · 24/02/2025 02:53

Yes unfortunately it would need to be done by a solicitor. You could ask the Court to award expenses in your favour which (if granted) means your exH will be liable to pay. An award of expenses is however never guaranteed and you should proceed on the basis that you will require to cover the costs yourself.

Have you looked into whether or not you qualify for legal aid?

Unfortunately due to income I'm not eligible for legal aid, but I'm still paying off the last solicitors fees so was hoping there was a way around it. Sigh 😔

OP posts:
ShinyClouds · 24/02/2025 07:44

I’ve never asked my ex and just taken mine abroad, he does the same, which is fine.

Id just say you’re taking her and let him take action, which would be unreasonable, or not discuss it at all.

Original poster
Exasperated80 · 24/02/2025 07:57

ShinyClouds · 24/02/2025 07:44

I’ve never asked my ex and just taken mine abroad, he does the same, which is fine.

Id just say you’re taking her and let him take action, which would be unreasonable, or not discuss it at all.

The thing is it would be knowingly breaking the law. It just wouldn't sit right with me. I took her away plenty before without a problem, but for America you can be asked for written permission. As soon as he knew he had something that I needed he just made my life hell!

I just know he would do anything and everything if he found out I was acting against the law for this so wouldn't risk it!

OP posts:
ShinyClouds · 24/02/2025 08:21

I’d suggest your dd sees a solicitor herself, perhaps them writing to your ex on her behalf might work better and she might get legal aid

Original poster
Exasperated80 · 24/02/2025 08:26

ShinyClouds · 24/02/2025 08:21

I’d suggest your dd sees a solicitor herself, perhaps them writing to your ex on her behalf might work better and she might get legal aid

Spookily enough I was just reading about that! The reason I haven't gone down that route before is that I didn't want her feeling caught in the middle. But now that he's clearly directing things at her, rather than me through her, she may feel differently. Thanks

OP posts:
ShinyClouds · 24/02/2025 08:57

She could try asking him first, and prepare a letter to sign allowing travel abroad. Document that she’s done that in case she needs to see a lawyer. Hopefully he won’t want to be more of an arse about it then

id try to get a general agreement rather than for specific trips so that you don’t need to go through this every time

Original poster
Exasperated80 · 24/02/2025 09:04

ShinyClouds · 24/02/2025 08:57

She could try asking him first, and prepare a letter to sign allowing travel abroad. Document that she’s done that in case she needs to see a lawyer. Hopefully he won’t want to be more of an arse about it then

id try to get a general agreement rather than for specific trips so that you don’t need to go through this every time

I did try that initially last year when I didn't think it would be a problem, and that's when it all blew up. He wouldn't even give her a reason for not signing, just point blank refused.

I guess it's worth trying again though. Even just to show we've tried!

I'm absolutely looking for something general about trips. Last time it was only specifically that trip because the holiday was within a couple of weeks and we needed an emergency hearing. He only refused about 6 weeks before the holiday, that he'd know about for 8 months. Then the sheriff wouldn't award costs against him because I should have gotten written consent before I booked, even though he'd never objected to any holiday before that. I'm not getting caught out again!

Sorry that was a bit of a rant 😂

OP posts:
ShinyClouds · 24/02/2025 09:08

I’m not surprised, I’d be furious, it’s just so stupid and needless 🤷🏼‍♀️

Karmamamama · 24/02/2025 09:25

There is this document which sets out in detail how to make an application as a litigant in person.

https://www.sharedparenting.scot/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/Representing-Yourself-in-a-Scottish-Family-Court-2021-edition.pdf

Also it could be worth you requesting a complete copy of your file from your solicitor last year. That should show the court documents submitted and you could use those as a guide. You shouldn’t be charged much/if anything for a copy of your file.

Original poster
Exasperated80 · 24/02/2025 09:49

@Karmamamama thank you so much for that link. To be honest after reading that I think it's all a bit much for me to try and do solo!! 😱

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