Has anyone cancelled a C100?

[Crlmt]

I filed a c100 to set in stone a child arrangements order as me and my ex partner could not agree. He was also threatening to withold child support in a bid to make me comply with whatever he wanted.

However, since applying, he has started work and now we have a schedule whereby he has our son overnight once a week every weekend. The nastiness has subsided and he is paying for our son.

Im not sure what benefit there would be in continuing the court process. I mentioned about the emotional abuse towards me throughout our relationship - not our son who is still a baby, however now we have limited contact and he is compliant Im not sure what will happen with that either.

I dont feel theres anything the court can now do to help as it seems to have resolved on its own after months of disagreement.

Im nervous about withdrawing the application as I will lose credibility should I need to re apply in the future. And I am also nervous about potential investigation around the emotional abuse as despite having evidence, I am still feeling vulnerable and would rather not start digging into the past.

Has anyone done this?

Don’t withdraw - keep going through the process and have it set in stone by the court.

But when you've withdrawn it due to his fake good behaviour, and he starts being horrible all over again, where will you be left if you don't file it?
A leopard doesn't change its spots.

I'm feeling really guilty because he has been sticking to the agreement. Although he shorted me £100 this month because hes not earning a salary yet which is confirmed by CMS.

Then again, he is known to be incredibly manipulative and a liar...I am just not sure what the court will do if theres no dispute at this time?

A court order saying dc lives with you means you won't need to ask his permission to go on holiday. Plus he's probably toeing the line because it's going to court, not in-spite of it.

Do. Not. Withdraw

let me guess, you don’t even go via CMS?

For how long has he been “sticking to this arrangement”?

Doesn’t really not occur to you that he’s sticking to it so you withdraw it

Wait are you saying he’s not even been in work for a month!!!

He quit work following his paternity leave. He hasnt worked since May but has recently started a new job, however its a startup and he isnt on a salary yet...just commission on whatever deals he makes. Its all sounds BS to me but I have no proof of anything. He was paying for our son still, however frequently threatened to not pay as he had no income, whenever we argued. He took home £75,000 on his last month of work so I dont believe he is short on cash.

Since he started working 2 weeks ago. The only time he has to see our son is a weekend so he has no choice really if he wants to see him. But at the time of filing, he wasnt working and didnt want him overnight every weekend...

I am actually terrified of going through this process. Im worried now hes sticking to everything I am going to be seen as the controlling narcissistic parent, when in fact it took me a lot to make this decision and I have lots of proof of his threats and disgusting behaviour

I did but he quit work the week after I filed.
He told me he would quit work and hide income so he legally didnt have to pay. But he then paid me out of 'goodwill'. So of course CMS wont enforce anything as he has no income and he knows it. But then he can use his goodwill to manipulate me

I am aghast you’re even considering withdrawing

Please re read all the posts you have made on this thread. Nothing in them indicates that you should withdraw but the opposite.

He has received the papers and told me he isnt happy at all. Im so scared the court will not believe/ see the abuse and he will somehow turn this round on me despite my intentions being to protect my own mental health and having some security.

You are right. I am just panicking now it feels real and I somehow feel I am going to come out of this worse off

I can’t even imagine - but you have to stay strong for yourself and for your baby. He is abusive - as you very well know there is not negotiating with abusive people there is no compassion, logic or self awareness. It’s about them not about what’s best for their kids. Don’t withdraw. If he mentions it again just say something along the lines of “I don’t want it to be contentious it’s just about putting baby’s interests first, and I know we both want that” and leave it at.

This is just another tactic to manipulate you. Go to court. It will protect you in the long run.

If you agree the arrangements you can ask for the agreed arrangements to be put into a consent order. You don't have to go through the full works of proving factually what did or did not happen but please ensure you have the security of a Court order if he is flakey!

I'm a family court magistrate. We often get to the hearing and families have managed to sort out an arrangement before the hearing so we just get parties agreement and write up the Order.
No one is going to be critical and instead will probably ask father why he couldn't sort his act out prior to the hearing!

I'd keep going with it and honestly think hard if every weekend is what you want.

What about when you're working all week and baby is older and has school? You're going to need 'fun time' too.

You need to think about what schedule is best, what's best for longevity (you may find if you want to change it when starts school to have that fun time a court may say no as status quo). You want to have a set schedule where he can't screw you about.