Scared,Just looking for advice if possible

[Shookethtothecore]

Hello,
I am currently going through a divorce from the world’s most awful man. I’ll spare you the details. But women’s aid and police have been involved due to emotinal abuse and coercive control. He is very wealthy compared to me. We have children.

in September, I bought the family home. I used money gifted to me from my parents. I am very lucky. He made me pay him £40k and ported our mortgage to buy a property for himself and I cleared the balance.

i had to agree to not come for his business, the pensions, spousal maintenance and a reduced child maintenance for him to agree to this. He put me under huge amounts of pressure to do so.

i recently found out his firm has come into Alot of money. When I found out, I asked if I could have some of the money back I gave him. It would really help me.

he went ballistic. Said I am greedy and he’s going to take me to court and my
morthage free home is an asset and he’s taking it.

nothing has been through solicitors,
he wrote the agreement himself and made me sign it.

can he do this, I’d let him keep the deal to get away from him and keep my home but I’m scared of the solicitor letters he’s telling me are coming.

he is utterly relentless

Get yourself to a solicitor. And fast.

With nothing legally agreed (you should have divorced and got a financial consent order) you may be on sticky ground. However - potentially same for him, if he's about to get a load of money.

I’m not a legal expert, so definitely solicitor, and not mumsnet advice!

Your definitely need to get proper legal advice. Book an appointment tomorrow!!

Any agreement you signed is not enforceable. It would only be used as the basis of the financial settlement if you both made a full financial disclosure and received independent advice. Him writing an agreement and getting you to sign it under duress doesn't come close. Do not let him keep the current deal which sounds like it is unfair to you and your children. See a solicitor urgently if you haven't got one already and get moving with a proper financial settlement alongside the divorce.

You are divorcing a rich, but awful husband and you have no solicitor??? Please get one asap. Do not gamble your kids future in this way.

Please listen to this advice ⬆️

Not wanting to put a downer on things but if he's mega-wealthy and owns his own firm then presumably he can afford good legal representation all the way to a final hearing and you probably can't. At best you'll get a dubious and cheap legal aid solicitor.

Before you start, I would exercise some caution and a commercial mindset as to whether it is worth the stress and the cost if you are comfortable with the position you are in. If the ex is abusive, he might even enjoy a good fight in court.

Not sure why you are suggesting her solicitor would be dubious.

Good legal representation won't allow him to make a deal stick if it is as clearly unfair to OP as it seems. And, in some circumstances, OP may be able to get an order making him pay for her legal representation.

I agree but based on the facts I'm not sure we even know if the current settlement is unfair? Or at least whether it is unfair enough to be worth the hassle and expense.

I'm not saying don't pursue it. I'm saying proceed with caution and a commercial mindset.

@prh47bridge I don't see LSPOs in my area very often so I don't know how common they are? Most of our clients have to pay their own fees.

So you are not actually divorced yet?

and there has been no financial consent order agreed by the court

if so, the agreement you signed is not valid.

you need urgent, competent advice from an experienced family solicitor. PLEASE do not try to do this on your own!

but also educate yourself:
Wikivorce
Divorce for Dummies
family solicitors websites.

you can do this.

I agree they are rare. But it is a possibility if OP is unable to get funding any other way and her husband has enough financial resources. I don't know if you are already aware of this, but there was a case earlier this year when the judge awarded the wife an LSPO in part because her husband was not being honest about his means and the court was satisfied that she would not reasonably be able to afford representation for the proceedings.

This.

He's a disgusting bully.

Interesting. It's probably a different level of client to what I am used to! Most of our clients are divorcing people who can barely afford their own fees let alone our client's.