My sister and another car collided, they agreed to pay for their own damages but have now changed their mind and gone through insurance?

[Mumsieslady]

I’m asking for my younger sister who doesn’t use Mumsnet but we are looking for advice. We live in England. My sister collided with another young lady in her car. I was in the car with her when this happened as witness. We all got out and exchanged details and photos with the other driver. They both agreed that the damage was minor paint work to both cars and both at fault so they agreed not to go through insurance as they both happened to be new young drivers. Then my sister and the lady deleted the pictures of each other’s car. I told my sister this was a bad idea and to go through insurance but she’s stubborn so refused. Regardless the very next day she fixed her car with a local mechanic out of her own pocket as it was minor paint damage and a dent.

She still ignored me and didn’t inform her insurer because she thought the damage was so minor even when I told her she should just in case but she wouldn’t listen. And now she has just been informed days later that the other party are going through insurance and have blamed her for the damage. She is fretting about this because she didn’t listen to me and didn’t report it at the time and the repairs have already been done to her car.

Does anyone know what we can do or what she should say to her insurer? She’s terrified that she will be in trouble for not declaring the accident and repairing her car already, especially now that the other lady is blaming her. I have no idea how to help her and she’s been crying about this all night. I wish the other lady had just been honest so then my sister would have just gone through insurance and not repaired but she knows it’s wishful thinking and now she has probably invalidated insurance or caused it to go up by so much come renewal. I also wish she had listened to me first and gone through insurance but hey. It’s too late now so I’m trying to help her as best as possible now. Any advice greatly appreciated.

can she recover the photos from her deleted files folder?

Without photo evidence and having not reported the incident at the time she’s not got many options unfortunately.

Sadly not as she deleted the photos from there too thinking the other lady would be honest. And we both genuinely forgot to ask her to do the same, she was so genuine and apologetic at the scene. I’m wondering if family or someone told her to go through insurance and she changed her mind. It’s so sad. My sister has explained everything to her insurance but I am doubting her insurance will side with her explanation without evidence. It was all verbal at the scene sadly.

I did think so. She’s totally stuffed. Silly teenagers making silly choices. Ah well. We are gonna have to wait for the outcome of the insurance claim but bless her she’s barely eating and sleeping because of this. I wish she had just listened to me. Hindsight is a wonderful thing. Thank you anyway.

It's not that the other lady is being dishonest, she agreed to something in the heat of the moment, has gone home and thought about it or spoken to someone more experienced who advised her differently and has followed the correct process. No good being irritated with her when it's your sisters poor decision making that put her in this position and if she collided with another person's car it is her fault.

She should ring her insurance plead ignorance and in experience and hope all works out ok.

No I agree with you. She really should have done the same as that lady and gone through insurance. Tbh I don’t know why she didn’t listen to me. I’m not upset with the choice the lady made, just a bit sad and disappointed for my sister who deleted everything on her word alone. She has told everything to her insurance based on her version of events because they called to notify of the other parties claim and get a statement. Let’s see how this goes. Thank you.

Exactly what @Singleandproud says. It's not about honesty.

I had someone go in to the back of me as we approached a roundabout at about 15mph. My car looked hardly touched but the bumper was damaged and had to be replaced. I had no car for five weeks.

My daughters car was hit from behind in a low speed shunt in queuing traffic. Only obvious damage was a dented bumper - until she opened the hatchback and couldn't close it again. Car was written off due to damage chassis.

You are a witness, you should write a statement to the insurance about what you saw and what was agreed at the scene. It was foolish to settle it on a handshake so to speak, but many of us have done it, had a slight touch, had a quick look and both sides thought not worth the hassle. Your sister should have a bill from the garage that did her repair to support the minor damage scenario, in the 'old days' you rarely or never had pictures, it was all done with a description. If the other party hasn't has repairs done your sister's insurance should inspect the car.

On the bad side it's possible the other party had another accident (causing more serious damage) so has now decided to put your sister's accident through her insurance to put all the damage against her. Or trying on a medical claim for whiplash.

Be very insistent about your perspective of the accident, don't let the other party railroad it.

The other person no doubt thought she'd pay for her own damage.....until she got a quote and realised how much it was going to cost! It's not unusual for this to happen. Bodywork is expensive.

In terms of "blame", this isn't surprising either. Each insurance company has a responsibility to mitigate (reduce) their own losses, so the going-in position is nearly always that the other party caused the accident, not them. It will then be up to your sister's insurance company to argue the other way, that your sister was blameless, and the other party caused the accident. They do this using your sister's evidence.

Your sister will just have to explain in as much detail as possible exactly what happened, what was said, who witnessed what etc. Lots of drawings etc. Photos would definitely have helped! The insurance company will look at the evidence and argue with the other insurers. If it isn't one party obviously at fault, and neither will accept the blame then they will usually share the liability, so each party pays for their own damage (sometimes called knock for knock).

You are supposed to declare accidents to your insurers, but if she comes clean and explains that it was so minor she just sorted the damage herself she shouldn't get into trouble.

What's the worst that can happen? You have insurance for a reason. If the accident is deemed her fault then yes, her premiums might go up a little. But she won't be fined/prosecuted/bankrupted.....not for a small scrape where no-one was injured.

I'm a fleet manager, by the way, so deal with a fair number of claims per year.

Who was at fault for the accident?

I'd guess that the third party has found that the repairs cost more than she expected, hence wanting to go through insurance. I don't think that means she was dishonest, you can't really blame her.

Your sister should just do the usual - submit a written statement and diagram.

You are not an independent witness, so likely your statement won't be of any use.

Kinda confusing but basically they were both driving round a bend at a traffic light in their own lanes and kinda collided with eachother so it was hard to tell who specifically was at fault. Both an even amount of damage to eachothers car doors as a side swipe. There was a minor dent on my sister’s car but kinda long and less scratches, but the lady had more scratches and I couldn’t see much of a dent.

I think the lady misjudged her lane or tried to move slightly over (she was in the left and my sister in the middle lane) and my sister wasn’t looking properly on both sides as she turned the bend and didn’t give the lady enough room. It was coming off a dual carriageway.

And rather equal distance of a hit. We parked to the side and exchanged there. I’m wondering if it’s worth contacting the police to see if we can obtain any CCTV footage or from her insurance? She’s with E-sure. Yeah I know what happened from my sisters side and personally think they are both at fault (maybe the lady slightly more? But who knows I’m not an insurer and couldn’t say!) But I highly doubt her insurance want anything from me. They haven’t asked and I was sat with her when she gave her version of events to her insurance company when they called.

It's good she had you as a witness and that might help making it a 50/50 claim but she will have to contact her insurance now. It's hard but a lesson learned that however nice the person is, you don't agree anything at the time especially as both parties will be shaken by an accident so not in a mood to make decisions. Sorry your sister is so upset though.

Might be worth checking her phone. She may have some cloud based storage that the photos could have backed up to without her knowledge.

unless shes had another accident and now trying to cover it up via making out it was this accident that caused the damage ?

Thank you! It’s her own fault really. She doesn’t need to contact her insurance as they contacted us first to get a witness statement. So we shall see how things go. Wondering if I can see if insurance will considering to go through CCTV to get any footage there as proof?

No I totally agree. I’m not blaming the lady as such as I totally get why she’d be smart and go through insurance like my sister should have. It’s just so awkward my sister deleting everything and the lady now saying my sister hit her. I’m hoping my sister will make it out this ok with just a few insurance hikes. Defo lesson learned. Thank you!

Thank you! I take it it’s not worth contacting the police or trying to get CCTV footage? We have a very good diagram of what happened and it’s very fresh in our minds. Luckily we just remembered my sister still has the pictures of her own damage because she emailed them over to the repair shop to get the initial quote before they repaired! So that’s one step in the right direction! Thank you.

Might be worth checking with the garage in case they took photos before repair or can give you a copy of the detailed job card.