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Splitting Assets and Escaping the Shared Home?

3 replies

Yeongfil · 26/09/2024 19:18

My friend has been divorced for a while now but he still lives with the ex-partner; he has to be extremely careful around her as she can have unexpected behaviour. They have a son together and this is the main reason he doesn't feel he can move out because from previous discussion she has suggested she will take their son away back to their home country and my friend will never see his son again.

She is manipulative, violent, still has to constantly have phone calls with him when he's not at home despite them being divorced and despite there not being any romantic aspect for years and years and years before. It all feels so complicated and I'm finding it very difficult to explain properly.

Her behaviour is just not normal. If someone doesn't agree with something she says, they are the enemy, it's like you have a fly in the room and she will attack it with a tank. She gets angry, borderline violent at small scenarios, let's say someone forgot to leave a light on in the hallway before she came home, and it's like a wild temper (tantrum?)... It appears she needs some help with her mental health I guess but she cannot see it so therefore she doesn't need it.

Where does my friend begin in trying to split assets when she is going to try and take everything? He contributed the most to their assets and he even made a more than reasonable offer that she and the son could still live in that house and she could pay the bills and my friend will help pay toward the mortgage but this is not good enough. It's like she thinks she owns him and to be honest, it's like he's 'letting' her do exactly that. He can't be free because he is always in fear. He managed the file for divorce but now everything seems to be at a standstill and I think the divorce was done like two years ago. It's all riding on the son.

I keep screaming at him to get legal help and he talks about the cost but I really think even a smaller cost for a small bit of advice could open some doors. Is there anything he can do regarding her episodes? Her threats to take the son away?

OP posts:
ByQuaintAzureWasp · 27/09/2024 15:29

He needs to see a solicitor about getting a financial settlement and what he needs to do to stop her taking child out of the country.

Igmum · 27/09/2024 16:31

Agree. He needs a solicitor.

Slightly concerned that you are screaming at him too.

prh47bridge · 27/09/2024 16:56

Assuming they were married when his son was born, he has parental responsibility. That means she would be committing a criminal offence if she took their son out of the country without his consent. If her country is signed up the the Hague Convention it should be possible to get the children returned to the UK. He can also hide his son's passport or, if he hasn't got one, stop him from getting a passport. If things come to a head and he believes his son will be taken out of the country within the next 48 hours, he can ring the police and they can issue a port alert to stop his son being taken out of the UK.

You need to stop screaming at him and he needs to see a solicitor and sort out a financial settlement.

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