Divorce or separate?

[Mamai100]

Could anyone give me an idea or what I should be doing?

My husband has been cheating, he's agreed to leave but he'll be spending a lot of time here because we have a baby and a toddler.

We are renting and so the only assets we have is £45,000 of mine which is for a house deposit. This money came from a property I bought before we married. He's agreed that the money will be kept for me and our daughters but I'm aware things could change and in all honesty after the last year I'm not sure I trust anything he says.

The other thing is I'll probably inherit from my parents and I'm doubtful they'd want him to have any of that!

So should I start divorce proceedings? My friend started her divorce in 2017 and its still not completed, can we avoid a drawn out one if we both agree?

How much does divorce cost in the UK?

At the very least get a financial separation agreement drawn up and signed asap so that you can get it in writing that he’s letting you keep the £45,000; and to make sure he has no claim to the future inheritance.

When I did this in 2009 it took about 6 weeks and cost just less than £1,000.

You can follow on with the divorce later and use the financial agreement as part of the divorce agreement, but doing this first will ring fence what he’s currently agreeing (before a new girlfriend eggs him on to claim half of everything that you own between you).

If there’s no arguments then divorces shouldn’t take as long as your friend’s! But do take some time.

You can apply for the divorce yourself on line, costs under £600. Should take 6 months or so.
Get legal advice from a family solicitor ASAP regarding your money but be prepared for him to take half.

You can get a written agreement but it wont stand tbh. Divorce now before the inheritance drops in..

Divorce now. What he agrees to now versus what might happen later are two totally different things. Protect yourself. As PP said, agreements don't count for *, only financial orders as part of a divorce clean break.

I'm so sorry you're going through this.

As everyone says, get divorced with a financial order (it’s possible to divorce without one and then he could come for any inheritance).

A future inheritance is not legally taken into account - hence it being a good idea to divorce before you inherit!

Your £45,000 is taken into account so I’d suggest getting divorced as quickly as possible while he still feels guilty and will hopefully take less than half. From reading what other women post on here, the guilt will last a couple of months at most. If he starts feeling the financial pinch when he moves out, probably less.