Going full custody and no contact

[Mamabird2022]

Hey everyone, does anyone know what the requirements are for full custody with a no contact order?
for background my child is 2. Her father is on the birth certificate but the relationship between myself and him was abusive. Mentally and emotionally which has been witnessed by the child on several occasions. He has also been verbally abusive towards her too. I spoke to a solicitor and she told me the best she could do for me was a residency order but must make some effort for him to see her. I’m worried that if he sees her this will be detrimental to her and because she is so young I will not know if any abuse has went on. His family are just as bad with smoking cannabis around her

you won’t stand a chance of getting this i’m afraid op

It's pretty much impossible to get an order in court stating no contact forever. You'll have to set out what kind of contact you would agree to and what you would expect to see before it progresses. So for example he could send her cards and gifts on birthdays/once a month/whatever, and if he does a domestic abuser program/drug misuse intervention it could increase to video calls/supervised in person.

Unless the environment for her is completely unsafe and you are able to prove this you will not get a no contact order.

What you may be able to push for is supervised contact, either at a center or with one of his family members. However you will need to be able to prove that he is not capable of safely looking after her - and not just your opinion, there has to be proof.

I have a no-contact order with DD’s father but there was provable abuse in his household and it took years and cost thousands upon thousands of barrister fees.

Is he trying to see her currently? Has he applied for contact?

There are benefits to you proactively getting a residency order -it may contain provisions that help you enforce boundaries and be allowed to take her on holiday for instance - but equally if he's not trying to have contact you may be inclined to tell him to apply to court and let him do the leg work. He may or may not.

Hi all thank you for your comments. All I want is what is best for her. The only evidence I have is text messages and police reports from where I’ve contacted the police about the abuse. I have conflicting messages from
him. Messages where he has stated he wants nothing to do with her and for me to “raise her to be a toxic cunt” then in the next breath he’s demanding to see her. He contacted ss to say I’ve had “multiple men” around her which is not true and when I spoke to the social worker he hadn’t disclosed anything about what had happened. Once I explained the situation they told me to withhold contact and go to court for an order to keep her safe. He contacted a mediation service again just stating I’m not allowing him to see the child which I do have a meeting with them
on Tuesday. He also contacted police in a different county (where my parents live) to inform them that I had illegally moved her without his permission. When I took the phone call and explained everything to the police including the fact that I had not moved they spoke to him about wasting police time. He has also called me and messaged me several times in the past few weeks asking to see her “one last time” and that I would never see him
again however he has threatened in the past to take her and run and his traveller family would hide him from the police and I would never see her again. He has also told me to drop her off in his care and for me to move back in with my family and that he would “never stop me from seeing her” stating the fact that she lives with me. I stated that if he has to have contact then a contact centre would be my preference but not with his family being a third party as they are all as toxic as each other. His mum has bipolar and is regularly off her medication and I have seen first hand her temper towards the children in her family also smacking them for discipline and smoking cannabis in the same room as the children.

No it was over the phone