Cafcass assessment

[Juststopamoment]

I’m being taken to court by paternal grandparents for withholding contact when they have a court order. The kids do not want to see them anymore. Because of issues that I have had with the grandparents in the past and specifically the grandmother Cafcass suggested that I attend a course with her so we get along. Seeing as she has lied to social services and the police with false allegations against me and I’ve had a non molestation order against her, how likely is it that they will enforce this? I’m hoping the court will get Cafcass to speak to the kids before the first hearing but it’s looking unlikely. She has had a detrimental effect on my mental health and I regard her as an abuser.

How old are your DC? If they are teens, I would assume that the courts will ask them what they want.

We are at the beginning of the same journey. False allegations to social services and the police, a non-molestation order, and now being taken to court for access by grandparents. The threads on here don’t give me much hope… Do you mind me asking if the allegations against you and the non-mol happened before or after the contact order was made?

Until someone more knowledgeable comes along, have some 🍷on me!

@prh47bridge always gives helpful and accurate advice. He may be able to answer your questions about whether CAFCASS will speak to the DC before the hearing and whether the DC’s wishes will be taken into account.

The age of your kids is huge in this. The older they are the more weight their view carries. You also can’t attend a course with someone you had a non-mol against. The court will chuck that out.

Cafcass can only speak to the kids if the court orders it - so it won't happen prior to the first hearing.

They will speak to the applicants and the respondents and prepare a safeguarding letter, which will contain info from initial checks with police and social services.

@Juststopamoment What court order do they have? Thats the key bit of info. What are you contravening? How could you get the order changed legally? Drastic action doesn’t bode well. You don’t like what CAfcass has suggested so clearly you might be seen as obstructive. It’s not about you. It’s about DC. As CAfcass are already involved, have they spoken to DC? Seems odd if they haven’t.

Here because I've been tagged, but I don't have anything to add to @JustAnotherLawyer2's advice.

Sorry, I forgot to check back on this. DCs will be 14 and 12 when we have the first hearing. I told Cafcass it’s imperative that the children are spoken to and he said it won’t happen before the first hearing. They’ve served me an Enforcement order. Although I do understand that this is about the DC I don’t see how they can’t take into account the huge effect that the grandparents had on my mental health and as the children’s only living parent I think it’s important that I am brought into the equation. I have no fears about any checks. We are doing well as a family.

@GhostOrchids I applied for the non molestation order before the contact order so it had no bearing on it but it did mean that I didn’t have to have any direct contact with them. I talk through their other son. I applied for it because they were making false allegations to multiple agencies and my kids schools and nurseries. The final straw came for me when the grandmother and her son followed me and the children to school while being abusive, it was a 15 minute walk in my neighbourhood. They had blocked me from leaving in my car. Its good to have had it even for 1 year as it shows the court how awful things got. But when I mentioned it in the court order the court said that it had been dealt with so it was placed to one side to some extent. I however will mention it every time. The grandparents also spun out that they are elderly now and can’t keep fighting like this which is a lie. I think they will keep taking me to court until one of them gets seriously ill or dies.

I was wrong. Carcass wont speak to dc yet. Your advocate should ensure their views ars known though at any subsequent hearing if there is one. I do believe court cases about dc are about dc. You don’t have to see the grandparents. You facilitate the visits. However do what your advocate says.

@TizerorFizz The problem is that the kids don’t want to see the grandparents. The lying has meant that their trust in their grandparents has been completely destroyed and I don’t trust the grandparents to take the kids somewhere that won’t affect their health. They have actually said that they want to take the kids wherever they want to and are trying to portray me as controlling. It’s a control and a safeguarding issue. They want more control over the kids as they lost that when their son died.

Where could they go that’s not safe? Abroad? That’s a different scenario. I think you must focus on dc and not what might happen. Unless they are taken somewhere against their will: but you keep their passports. The grandparents got the order in the first place so their case was upheld. Now dc are older, they should get a say but don’t coerce them or turn them against the grandparents because no one likes that either. You do run the risk of being seen as unreasonable.

@TizerorFizz Taking them directly to places where their allergies have been triggered when I’ve told them not to take them there. I can absolutely see that I’m going to be seen as unreasonable. The children have witnessed enough now to make up their own minds.

I haven't seen my kids for 10 years but they was a court order that I was allowed to see my kids once a mth supervised. He didn't stuck to the court order.everytime the social worker wrote a letter to dad saying he has to apply by law but he never did and now it's been 10 years.. why was this allowed to happen

I feel like my kids have been threw he'll and back and they wasn't protected at all now there 16yrs of age and what they've been through all the years under their dad's care.and why when social worker was involved with me every time I fell pregnant I would always tell them and stress a court order was made and I was allowed supervised contact. And never stuck to the order. Why it wasn't took further when I informed the social worker and why they didn't make contact with there siblings after I had given birth. The main concern is why don't social worker's have a duty to make sure the child had read there life story if that's what is in there case when the child is older .how come that isn't checked that the child had been shown there life story and checked by a professional

If they are 16 it is now too late, but it was open to you to ask the courts to enforce the order. That is not the job of social services, nor are they there to tell children their life story. Their job is simply to make sure the child is in a safe and stable environment.

You've been fighting them for years now. Adamant from the start that your children should have nothing to do with them. It sounds like they won their court battle and still you continue to fight it.

I'm only posting because I read a recent case where a 13 years old, deem of good intelligence, no learningdifficulties, was denied his wishes to live with his dad full time. Despite talking directly to judge and despite expressing this wish since he was 10 years old.

The reason: they felt that his wish was influenced by his dad's views and opinion.

So it's not always the case that kids get what they want after a certain age.