Prohibited steps order

[Orangeleaf827]

Hi all,

So I'm in need of some advice, as I'm not really sure on what to do or where I stand. Any advice would be welcomed and extremely grateful.

My ex partner and I ended and not on good terms. We decided that we would co-parent, so he would have our daughter (9 months old) for 2 weeks and then I would have her for 2 weeks.
Every time he would drop our daughter off she had severe nappy rash, dehydrated, unexplained bruising and smelling of urine and cats.
On Christmas day last year he called me saying he "couldn't do it", "she's better off without me" and "I can't be a dad" and that I had to go pick up our daughter.
I decided after that I would safeguard our daughter, and said that if he wanted to see her it would be in a neutral location and supervised. He declined this.

I wanted to go back down south and see my family but didn't think it was ideal for my daughter to be on a coach for 11 hours and my ex offered to have her. We agreed that he could have her whilst I was away and that I would have video calls and daily updates on her. However he got extremely jealous that I was catching up with old friends I hadn't seen in 6+ years. He then proceeded to tell me I can't see our daughter anymore unless I came back north. I received text and phone calls of him shouting at me and claiming I'd never see her again. I decided to head back north, and he gave our daughter back to me and apologize, stating that he was jealous and just wanted me back. So I made the decision that I would moved back down south with our daughter and be with my family where I was happy, safe and supported, also my daughter would be happy, safe and supported as well.

Flash forward a few months he agreed to phone calls so I would let him video call and see her but all I would get is abuse from him, kicking off over things I'd post with family and friends. He wouldn't interact with her or acknowledge her. I decided to block him on all socials but could still contact me via my phone number and Whatsapp.

Yesterday afternoon I received a prohibited steps order from the course from my ex, as he's decided that he wants us both back up north.
Now I want to know seeing as both myself and our daughter is settled (She's at baby groups, has weekly playdates, in a great routine, registered with the doctors and health visitor and I'm also working and have started seeing my old childhood sweetheart) can he have us move back up north and keep us there!? Or can I fight it and stay down south with my family!?

I'm terribly sorry it's long, I'm just unsure of my options.

Hi.

he can apply for a prohibited steps order and say it is because he wants you to move back but he has to give valid reasons why and then you have to give valid reasons why that’s not in the best interests of you daughter. In the end there may be a child arrangements order given as well to establish contact with each parent.

you haven’t made yourself sound too good though. At first you say that whilst sharing custody he didn’t care for her and told you he didn’t want her but in the next step you were quite happy to leave her with him while you took an 11 hour coach trip to see family. A judge would look at that and dismiss your original concerns because why would you do that if he neglected her like you say?

back to the prohibited steps, get yourself a solicitor and outline your reasons why you won’t be moving back, however, there is a high chance that you will end up having a contact arrangement where you will both have to travel etc for him to see her

Thank you I appreciate your message.

Regarding the trip to my family, the only reason we had come to the agreement that she would be with him, was the fact that her maternal grandmother would be there to supervise. I apologize I should have added that.

I'm more than happy to travel and vise versa, it's just I don't want to have to move back there as we didn't really have a life. We spent majority everyday at home not being aloud to leave our family home, as he wouldn't allow it and would constantly look at my location on an app he put on my phone. If I did go out I had to ask permission, but that was only allowed to go to the shop. I couldn't take her to baby groups or interact with other children her age.

Ok that makes sense. Make sure you include every detail. Write yourself a list of all points you want to include. You e made a life for you both and are settled so they probably wouldn’t see it in the best interests of your daughter to move her but they will probably sort out a contact arrangement which will be a child arrangement order. Definitely speak to a solicitor

It's not so much about making you relocate but it's more so the court could order your child is relocated back to where they used to live.. especially as you essentially had shared care.

I'd prepared a proposal on how you'd be prepared to facilitate contact and what steps you'd take to do the travel etc.